Im nauseated by life right now, I want peace but all im getting is pain
Rain
@rainpupvr.bsky.social
(They/She) 25 Masc 🇨🇦 Bisexual 18+ VRC Host, Avi Creator, Gogo, and Club Dancer Im like a guy in a girl way and a girl in a guy way... ya know?
Im gonna blow my shit schmooth off the next time I catch feelings
Empty a mag in me the next time I start twirling my hair for a man
So turns out he really only dates other men. IF I HAD A FUCKIN NICKLE FOR EVERYTIME EITHER I HAVE MADE SOMEONE GAY OR THEYVE TURNED OUT TO BE GAY ID HAVE LIKE 4 NICKELS
Rain@rainpupvr.bsky.social · 2mo agoThat man, could literally show up at my wedding and tell me he loves me and I would be his... I dont know why I yearn so deeply for him. I swear we must've been soul mates in another life. Despite him telling me to give up on him because he wont be ready for a long time... I cant not yearn for him
Home is supposed to feel safe, and it generally does... until its the one place I am not out and have to hide who I am
I had someone ask me my pronouns and how i identify last night and I responded with "your guess is as good as mine" I love confusing people
That man, could literally show up at my wedding and tell me he loves me and I would be his... I dont know why I yearn so deeply for him. I swear we must've been soul mates in another life. Despite him telling me to give up on him because he wont be ready for a long time... I cant not yearn for him
Genderfluid dysphoria for me feels like im a missing texture Nothing is correct, everything feels wrong
Someone recently said "dont fall in love with the reflection of your love in there eyes" and it killed me. Ive spent so much time and effort telling someone how much I love them and care about them for them to not believe it. I fell in love with my own love, not theres....
Idk what to do about my birthday this year... a piece of me doesnt wanna send out invitations this year just to see who would show up, but also I always hold a big birthday bash cause the idea of feeling forgotten is almost worse
I used bsky to yap to the universe, im sorry for having to see me crash the fuck over men every few months
I miss sleep calls, I miss late night cuddles, I miss being someone's someone...
My body is so confused, cause i feel like I wanna cry from being rejected but im also like "Im gonna be an adult about this and not" and so im like silently internally upset but kinda still just going about my day
AND HE WOULDVE NEVER CARED IF I LIVED OR DIED
Rain@rainpupvr.bsky.social · 3mo agoTo love the ones who say theyre unlovable,, I know im fuckin delusional but good lord im COOKED
Empty a mag in me the next time I start twirling my hair for a man
First thing was an alcoholic beverage, which helped tbh
Rain@rainpupvr.bsky.social · 3mo agoWhen no one wants to host in the brain so you just boy mode cause he doesn't get out much
When no one wants to host in the brain so you just boy mode cause he doesn't get out much