No #TOTP for me as I'm up with the lark to drop sprog no 1 off at the land of salt n sauce
Biting my tongue at mum calling up eldest and saying "Yes your dad had a great time at university and you will too" Conveniently leaving out the fact she was on the phone to me every day for first year saying that I had no right to just leave her on her own.
This is one of my favourite things of all time. Felix was an absolute genius
Jonathan Roberts@jonrob5000.bsky.social · 22h agoRhys Thomas hanging on by the skin of his teeth to not fully corpse. Quite a feat when faced by Felix Dexter in full flow
I have reached the "needs-more-mountains-and-less-people" stage of my life
I'm a bit quieter than usual on here but you're all still my favourites
So I've just finished Colin from accounts S3 and I'm going to need a few minutes...🫠
This advert pisses me off for a number of reasons but by far the weirdest one is that he doesn't appear to have any scants on.
There's a pain au chocolat in the kitchen looking at me like this 🤤
If this is a elaborate set up for a 'Deez' joke then I'll be pretty pissed off tbh
Our three little ducklings plus one
Another fascinating development. His wankmobile space was taken by a neighbour from end of the street (who's wife doesn't drive & suffers from early dementia) Wife rocked up to get the bag she forgot in car...he flies out of house (because he's watching Ring camera) and asks her to move the car.
Son of Bengt@sonofbengt.bsky.social · 8mo agoThese pricks continue to fascinate me. Now have 3 cars to protect their space. As soon as the middle car leaves they move another a little (over two road spaces) They sit and watch their ring camera constantly as they run out if a space they want gets free. How can you live your life like this?
Well today I learned that Vasquez was the mother in Titanic reading a story to her kids in bed
I am still riding this high. Things just seem...'possible' now that weren't before. New lease of life at 50. Woo, go me! 🎉
Son of Bengt@sonofbengt.bsky.social · 5d agoWell...shit! They agreed to my proposal. Basically this means I now have a business in profit 😀
What’s it like inside your head?
Speccy Twat@speccytwat.bsky.social · 3d agoWhat’s it like inside your head?
Refusing to put the heating on to defeat the 🐙
Braveheart William Wallace: Hold Stonk Hold
ALT: Braveheart William Wallace: Hold Stonk Hold
static.klipy.com
Delighted to report that the whole of Scotland has united in fury against American Dog Lady and that is a #NiceThing.
Island cafe at heart of legal row with US woman over dog ban raises £177k
THE organisation that runs a community cafe in the Outer Hebrides that is at the heart of a fierce legal row with an American woman after her dog…
thenational.scot
This joke from primary school just popped in my head: Teacher: "Mary, what does a cow say?" "Moo!" "Well done" "John, what does a sheep say?" "Baah!" "Very good, John" (She turns to Mark, from the rough council estate) "Mark, what does a pig say?" "GET IN THE VAN YA WEE PRICK!"
Last 4 characters you saved on your phone are your d&d party
Auld Bendy@auldbendy.bsky.social · 5d agoAst 4 characters you saved on your phone are your d&d party
Ok, how I stop seeing the picture of those gurning idiots on the train with the divorced cosplay ninjas?
Colin from accounts S3 is fantastic The twatty boss on the laptop gives me flashbacks to my last job though. I wish i could share with you some of the stuff that is still going on there