Tessera

Star Trek Minus Context

@nocontexttrek1.bsky.social

Double dumb-ass on you. (And so fourth) #AltText enthusiast. Also on mastodon, formerly on twitter. Other similar accounts are not me.

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Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 3w ago

Star Trek The Original Series scene. Kirk, in the dessert, has his shirt ripped open and looks like he's been in quite the tussle. He's doing a fist pump, as if his favorite sporting team recently scored a sporting point.

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

It's the weekend, baby

Star Trek Voyager scene. Seven of Nine (tertiary adjunct of unimatrix 01) is pictured. She has a dolphin shaped metal robotic implant around her left eye because she is a borgs. Closed caption reads, "Fun will now commence."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

Star Trek Voyager scene. Ok, so we see the EMH doc in uniform standing in front of what must be like a movie theater sized screen just behind him. On that screen is two Klingons in their Klingon military uniforms with long hair and forehead ridges. The Klingons are looking at each other and snarling and kind of intertwined. Closed caption reads, "initiate courtship by biting the female."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. An early season clean shaven William T. Riker is shown investigating something. You can tell he's investigating something because he's leaning forward on one leg, and looking *intently*. I think he's in the transporter room. Closed caption reads, "Odd-looking."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. We're in the bridge of the "D" and Worf stands with arms crossed, looking defiant. (Like pissed and fed up not like the USS Defiant from Deep Space 9)
Closed caption reads, "Die."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

Star Trek The Final Frontier scene. Kirk and Spock, friendly colleagues, are on the bridge in their 'movie red' uniforms. Kirk is facing Spock and holding onto his shoulders as if he's going to share a long kept secret that dareth not be spoketh.... or maybe just going in for a hug, as good work associates do. Spock is just standing and speaking, and being held by Kirk. Closed caption reads, "Please, Captain... Not in front of the Klingons."

Forbidden alt text contained in image 1

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

So there's a large guard looking fellow. He's wearing a dirty fur vest garment, some armor, and holding a shield. Has a shielded helmet on too but the helmet also has hair. It's like a reverse mullet helmet with metal plating for protection. Mr. Man here has a messy & thick beard, and could really benefit from seeing a dentist. Basically this guy has seen better days but is still menacing in a meth kind of way. He's standing guard in front of a castle door. Closed caption reads: [Grrr]

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 4w ago

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. We're on the bridge of the Enterprise. Various crewfolk are crewfolkin' in the background and we see Counselor Troi standing and looking like she's half offended and half interested in something. Closed caption reads, "He's planning to beam himself"

Ian Robberson @microberust.bsky.social · last mo.

Read the Alt Text

Star Trek Minus Context@nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

DS9 scene. Ezri Dax and Odo (🎶 Bucket's of fun🎶) are standing next to a table. Both are wearing clear safety glasses, and both are human looking though one has a slug worm thingy inside of her and the other is a shapeshifter guy with v smooth features. On the table is a round purple object being held up by some kind of holder-upper type thing. Closed caption reads, "Now, take a step back from the melon."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

DS9 scene. Ezri Dax and Odo (🎶 Bucket's of fun🎶) are standing next to a table. Both are wearing clear safety glasses, and both are human looking though one has a slug worm thingy inside of her and the other is a shapeshifter guy with v smooth features. On the table is a round purple object being held up by some kind of holder-upper type thing. Closed caption reads, "Now, take a step back from the melon."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Scene from Picard Season 3. We're in space and looking at one of those giant Federation spacedocks that looks like a floating mushroom. We see a beautiful version of the Enterprise from the underside doing a fly by. Exploding all around are big bursts of fireworks. Reds, greens, yellows, purples, pinks all beautifully fireworking it up in space. Can fireworks burst like this in space? I'm sure people will argue and expound in the comments, stay tuned!

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. We're "on the D" and see Picard in red uniform sitting on the bridge in his captain's chair. Looks like he's stewing about something. (Pun intended) Closed caption reads, "("Stars and Stripes Forever" plays loudly)"

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

🇺🇸

Star Trek Deep Space Nine scene. Close up on Quark, a Ferengi guy with a smooth and domed head that kind of looks like a butt and huge exaggerated earlobes that connect like a unibrow across his forgead. He also has nose loaf that kind of looks like a pine cone. He is pursing his mouth and doing a 'Jim from The Office' look to camera. Closed caption reads, "baseball, root beer, darts, atom bombs."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

It's the weekend, baby

Star Trek Voyager scene. Seven of Nine (tertiary adjunct of unimatrix 01) is pictured. She has a dolphin shaped metal robotic implant around her left eye because she is a borgs. Closed caption reads, "Fun will now commence."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

stefa @stefapie.bsky.social · last mo.

Being this gifted with alt text means the images not working doesn't really matter, and alt text in general rules also everyone should use it! Not just for accessibility but also because you can cram in more jokes

Star Trek Minus Context@nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek First Contact scene. We're in a clearing outdoors with thicc green forest and camping tents in the background. We see Zefram Cochrane (a human guy) further back looking up towards Geordi, and Geordi up close, on some kind of platform or stage. He's posing, holding one arm up and out, as if getting handed something from someone above. Both he and Zephram are wearing civilian clothing, outdoorsey "I own a kayak" type stuff.
Closed caption reads, "I gotta take a leak."

An exoskeleton @just-a-chrysalis.bsky.social · last mo.

New challenge: figure out STMC screencap by alt text alone

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek First Contact scene. We're in a clearing outdoors with thicc green forest and camping tents in the background. We see Zefram Cochrane (a human guy) further back looking up towards Geordi, and Geordi up close, on some kind of platform or stage. He's posing, holding one arm up and out, as if getting handed something from someone above. Both he and Zephram are wearing civilian clothing, outdoorsey "I own a kayak" type stuff.
Closed caption reads, "I gotta take a leak."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. Data is sitting motion less like he's glitching and malfunctioning or maybe just tripping balls. Picard is holding his arm and has an arm behind his back to stabilize him and he's making a face like you'd make if you were a pirate and yelling YARRRRRRR, MAYEY!!
Closed caption reads, "How do I destroy everything?"

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

[gong]

Star Trek The Original Series scene. We're on a planet that appears rocky with a red backdrop sky because it was probably inexpensive! We're looking at some kind of ceremonial area, with stone carved features and flat surface for a performance or ritual. In the middle is maybe a fire or coal pit, and some artifacty items. Standing with his back to us is Spock, in baby blue uniform, and he's hitting a mallet against one of those gong things that makes a big gong sound. Closed caption reads, "[gong]"

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek Picard scene. An older Worf is shown, white eyebrows and goatee. There's a 'Mr. Worf Goes to a Rave' feel, with what looks like confetti dropping over him, blacklighting, and abstract art on the walls behind him, presumably drawn in Tide. Closed caption reads, "Beheadings are on Wednesdays."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Show me a picture that captures your essence

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. For some reason Worf is sitting and looking at himself in a circular salon type mirror. He holds a tuft of his mustache between two fingers daintily, admiringly. He looks transfixed by his own beauty, because of course he is beautiful. No caption. Words would add nothing of value to this moment.

aric@aghastronaut.com · last mo.

show me a picture that captures your essence

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek The Animated Series scene. Cartoon Kirk is standing in his gold uniform, and has a man satchel over a shoulder. Behind him is a green and blue archway/wall design. Closed caption reads, "[FLAPPING] There it is again, a flapping sound."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek The Original Series scene. We're on planet somewhere and in a room backlit in purple and red. There's a human looking man standing and looking off in the distance with a determined face. He's wearing a snug white long sleeve shirt and white spandex pants that fit a bit too tight if you ask me. Definitely rocking some moose knuckle. Kirk and Spock are standing on either side of him, Spock is holding his arm and leaning in as if whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Closed caption reads, "Logic is a little tweeting bird."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

DS9 scene. Dax looks like she might be in a purple dress versus a uniform here, and she's short of draped onto The Sisko, also in casual wear. She's doing that thing where someone who is annoyingly drunk gets way too close to tell you something they think is SO IMPORTANT but really they're just hammered and it's stupid nonsense. Closed caption reads, "Have I ever told you that you smell wonderful?"

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

It's the weekend, baby

Star Trek Voyager scene. Seven of Nine (tertiary adjunct of unimatrix 01) is pictured. She has a dolphin shaped metal robotic implant around her left eye because she is a borgs. Closed caption reads, "Fun will now commence."

Kyle Hilliard @kylehilliard.com · last mo.

Acting.

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek Voyager scene. We're on the bridge! of "The Voyager" and we're seeing a convo between Chakotay and Janeway. We're facing Chakotay and see Janeway from the back. They're in command chairs next to one another. Chakotay is leaning in, and has a smirk on his face. Seems like that thing where you lean in to say something you don't want everyone else in the room to hear. Closed caption reads, "You strike me as the bear type."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · last mo.

Star Trek The Next Generation scene. Riker and Worf stand close together for a dude chat in a corridor on the Enterprise D. Worf in gold uniform with silver baldric, Riker in command red. Worf is looking cautiously/suspiciously at Riker. Riker has raised brow and a cheeky grin. Thier eye contact is strong as steel. Closed caption reads, "It's jazz."

Star Trek Minus Context @nocontexttrek1.bsky.social · 2mo ago

It's the weekend, baby

Star Trek Voyager scene. Seven of Nine (tertiary adjunct of unimatrix 01) is pictured. She has a dolphin shaped metal robotic implant around her left eye because she is a borgs. Closed caption reads, "Fun will now commence."