Jay Besemer

@divinetailor.bsky.social

poet•author•artist•fool. aging, tr^ns, qu♾️r, sick/disabled, autistic. he/they. 🛑DO NOT ADD TO STARTER PACKS WITHOUT CONSENT!🛑 http://www.jaybesemer.net

POETS BEWARE—USE CAUTION AND DO NOT APPROACH. if you encounter plums in a refrigerated environment, be advised that they may be engaged in poet-catching activity & therefore pose a significant risk to your personal safety. this risk increases with groups of plums. to report plums: 1-800-ATE-PLUM

closeup of two black plums on the green lid of a round plastic container, in a refrigerator. a red bag of supremo shredded chihuahua cheese is in the background.

Adoptee friends & others impacted by adoption: I'm a librarian planning a display for November (National Adoption Month). These are just some of the books that'll be on display—I'd love your suggestions!

A stack of 12 library books about adoption with spine titles shown. The titles are: 
* Broken Links, Enduring Ties 
* Somebody's Children
* Culture Keeping
* Like Our Very Own: Adoption and the Changing Culture of Motherhood 1851-1950
* Following the Tambourine Man: a Birthmother's Memoir
* Giving Away Simone
* The Violence of Love: Race, Family, and Adoption in the United States
* Choosing Family
* Gay Fathers, Their Children, and the Making of Kinship
* BirthMarks: Transracial Adoption in Contemporary America
* Kinship by Design: A History of Adoption in the Modern United States 
* A Living Remedy

observing (late) lammas, & the 2-year anniversary of jet’s death. swamp mallow, every path becomes a stream. across the dangerous road, in the woods, two stags dash ahead. i used to wake up to this smell every day, unzip my tent & breathe.

i get these periodic urges to go to the town where i was born, to follow the history of my birth families west, to be in the places (the land) where they lived & worked. i don’t know what i am seeking in this; maybe a fuller bodily relation with the places i’m/they were from or made lives…

the funny thing about relying on other people’s fear for one’s sense of (or actual) power is that it means you fear other people. when they lose their fear of you, your hold over them is gone. i learned about this in my origin family & from bullies, & i witness it at every gradation of scale.

i so love the kono “rekorder” repurposed b&w sound film…that deeeeep daaaark black, super-detailed sharpness…whew⚡️ some frames have pre-exposed timestamps for added surprise & mystery

a very high-contrast textural and graphic extravaganza of a weathered concrete wall surface. it’s covered with graffiti, unexplained numbers that seem related to its original purpose, drips and smears of paint that may or may not be intentional—and a “no fishing” sign.an odd high-contrast b&w shot of a small stalk of charming pale flowers (yellow, in life) with five round petals and dark centers. their leaves are somewhat star-shaped, and a string of white letters and numbers extends vertically in the center of the image.

i want to talk more about zen but so much of it is not really possible to articulate in words, the stuff that really matters can only be experienced & practiced. i’m starting to get why there are so many misconceptions about it, & there’s nothing i can do about that. it’s not comfortable to accept

i put a glow-in-the-dark MYOPIC BOOKS sticker on the back of the black phone case of my black phone & i feel very pleased with my oddball strategy for finding my phone in the dark. now i only have to remember to lay it face down every time. sure, that’ll be easy!🙃

frustrated with & disappointed by yet another offering on addressing online toxicity whose rhetorical moves mainly just reinforce, repeat & retrench the very language behaviors it purports to critique & remedy. we don’t have time for that.

may be setting up a reading/signing/❓ for ON BEING HALF-IMAGINARY at chi tardis…sent the initial email this morning. as i told a friend, i’m still a bit ambivalent about combining work with play—CT has kind of been my birthday vaycay for the past some years. but looking at what i do there, i do see

volunteering at chicago tardis con was a great experience last year, though it’s not something i can do again. if you’re curious about it, def give it a try! there are many options for a fit with your interests & skills.

Chicago TARDIS@chicagotardis.bsky.social · last wk.

Volunteers are essential in the time and space adventure that is Chicago TARDIS! Take the opportunity to apply to volunteer for our con through the end of the summer: chicagotardis.com/volunteer

lots of domestic machinery fails this weekend (window AC unit, garage door spring, etc.) so we find ourselves again contemplating the fine line between necessity & liability. or i do, anyway. also mourning the passing of a world where such things have *become* necessities. i’m not a luddite, but.