Ryan opens a book called ‘How to talk to people.’ “Alright… Step 1, think of what to say… Step 2… Say… It… … This book sucks.”

“NUH UH. IT WOULD BE HILARIOUS FOR BOTH OF US!!!”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 3d ago

“IT WOULD HAVE ONLY BEEN FUNNY FOR YOU!!”

He puts on a construction worker helmet ontop of his wizard hat which looks very stupid. “Imma just put this one for safety… Besides you already look like you’ve been smacked around by someone who also got aggressively violent.”

𝔸 𝔾𝕦𝕪 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤!@webofspider-man.bsky.social · 3d ago

Is actually pretty fine. He's used to eating some extremely spicy food. "I just needed the carbs, sorry man." He looks a little like he'd been hit by a low flying plane.

He watches in absolute horror “… Dude… D-Don’t actually eat those… I don’t like being around other people who can’t handle spicy food… They become aggressively violent.” He says actually trembling like this has happened before…

𝔸 𝔾𝕦𝕪 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤!@webofspider-man.bsky.social · 3d ago

THWIP. "Yoink." Now he's munching... Wait. He didn't take off the mask. MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH. THE HORROR.

Eldric is loudly munching a bag of spicy chips… Specifically a shareable bag of chips… They look really good.

“Haha… Gonna just… Be Eldric now because that’s all everyone cares about! Just gonna be the grand ol happy little wizard! Woohoo!!!… Woohoo…”

“Damn it was worth a shot… It would’ve been really funny though”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 3d ago

“Let me think reeaally hard about whether I’d let myself-a be sold... Hmm... ...No.”

“Luigi cmon… Turn yourself into a Lego so I can sell you… Please?” He says with googly eyes

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 3d ago

“I don't know about-a that... I think I'd rather hunt ghosts in abandoned mansions for money than sell myself as a Lego hostage... At least I already have experience hunting ghosts!”

“Yeah… Not my fault you turned into a Lego dude! I mean I could consign you to a Bricks and Minifigs, then when you’re stolen from me I can fight to get you back and get millions of views on the internet and then sooner or later they’ll settle and we’ll make millions… …Yknow what? Let’s do it!”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 3d ago

“So I’m going to be bought-a, lose my rights, get abducted and stolen by other people, AND be dragged into a court case?! THAT IS A TERRIBLE LIFE!!”

“… Actually yeah! You ever heard of the $200,000 Lego scandal?! Bricks and Minifigs totally stripped away a guy’s freedom of speech with corrupt cops and stuff! … So yeah”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 3d ago

“DOES THAT MEAN I LOSE ALL MY HUMAN RIGHTS AS SOON AS I'M-A TURNED INTO A LEGO?!”

“ITS TRUE! I mean I’d say it’s only true without the mask… Even then I have my doubts.”

Ivette “Ivy” Velez / The Jaguar@themightyjaguar.bsky.social · 3d ago

she spoke in a higher pitched tone, her voice shaking “WH-WHAT?!? Sh-Shut up!” she cleared her throat and crossed her arms, her voice becoming deeper and gravely “…shut up…”

“You’re a bottom that wants to be a top so badly.”

Ivette “Ivy” Velez / The Jaguar@themightyjaguar.bsky.social · 4d ago

“Bottom? No. Top.”

“When you’re a minifigure, technically not!”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 4d ago

“I'M-A PRETTY SURE THAT'S ILLEGAL!!”

ᅠ ᅠ ᅠ ᅠ⠀⠀ ❝ Check it out, Dipper! I successfully bezazzled my face! ❞ ᅠ ᅠ ᅠ ᅠ⠀

Mabel Pines! 💫@shooting-starsx.bsky.social · 4d ago

Ryan looked down at his wizard robes sitting beside him on a couch. “…I don’t feel like being him today.” He looked around. “Anyone wanna hang out?”

“… Imma pretend who those people are … And my beard is totally real! Your face is fake!”

𝔸 𝔾𝕦𝕪 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤!@webofspider-man.bsky.social · 4d ago

"Wizard dude with the fake beard... Only the X-Men will find this relatable. And only Nightcrawler and Rogue."

“I don’t know, I just say stuff to make people mad… So yeah… But you fumbled like a dick”

Agent Spider | Vincent Valet@invincible-spidey.bsky.social · 4d ago

“Currently? No one. I did date a secretary, a cheerleader, a reporter, a model… …but much like this conversation? Fully admit I fumbled…how about you?”

Ryan is laying down infront of a generic fast food restaurant… Staring up at the sky… This time he looks as if he hasn’t slept for a good minute. And it doesn’t seem like he’s gonna sleep any time soon. Too many thoughts and feelings racing through his body… Just too many.

// lowkey actually feeling really… really down right now… Expect some Ryan angst. I’m utilizing my sadness!

“This is a highly relatable situation right here!”

𝔸 𝔾𝕦𝕪 𝔽𝕣𝕠𝕞 ℚ𝕦𝕖𝕖𝕟𝕤!@webofspider-man.bsky.social · 4d ago

“NAHNAHNAH WHO ARE YOU DATING THEN”

Agent Spider | Vincent Valet@invincible-spidey.bsky.social · 4d ago

“Turns out, I’m going to have an awkward conversation.”

“My parents died when I started wizard school.”

Agent Spider | Vincent Valet@invincible-spidey.bsky.social · 4d ago

“Turns out, that IS his mom. And he’s going to have a very…awkward conversation later.”

“YO ILL WHOOP YOUR ASS! YOUR GIRLFRIEND LOOK LIKE MY MOM!”

“Well that sign can’t stop me cause I can’t read!”

Elf princess Elise@eliseurayel4.bsky.social · 4d ago

Do not be rude to each other.

“IM GONNA PACKAGE YOU UP AND SELL YOU ON EBAY”

[ 𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕁𝕦𝕞𝕡 𝕄𝕒𝕟 ]@onejumpman.bsky.social · 4d ago

“THEY TURNED ME INTO A MARKETABLE LEGO MINIFIGURE!!”

@eldricthewizard.bsky.social //for you

Incase any of yall are curious about what Eldric listens to…

Eldric’s Playlist

Playlist · Shiba · 37 items

open.spotify.com

// I actually got quite a lot to say so hit me!

“I’m not offensive. No! Some people find everything offensive! … okay.”

Ryan’s looking in the mirror “My shit looking gross. I look poor.” He turns to the reader “Nah don’t lie to me bitch, I don’t look cute”