Mark Hurst
@hurstaka.bsky.social
Ah, Juicy Fruit.. https://hurstaka.wordpress.com/
Breaking: #CountBinface comes under fire for undeclared donations. It is alleged that he has so far received: Half a Mint Aero An out of date, losing lottery ticket A book of four 2nd class stamps A Lidl carrier bag (torn) Some football stickers #ClactonByElection
Traditional FIFA Nursery Rhyme There once was a man called Folarin Balogun He got a match ban, for fouling another man Infantino got a call from a man with an orange tan Now Folarin Balogun's back again.. #BELUSA #Trump #Fifaworldcup
I'm not wholly convinced that Morrisons is that committed to discouraging shoplifters. Not only did they sack a staff member for trying to stop one, but my local branch has a sign at the meat section, saying - 'Grab and Go'..
Polls have now closed at the Galton & Simpson by-election. The turnout is expected to be very nearly an armful..
Bloke in the supermarket, picking up watermelons, holding them to his ear, and tapping them. Can't help imagining his face if one tapped back..
Political Nonsense. Twas Brylcreem, and the slimy tories Did squirm and dangle in the wabe All mimsy were the Faragegroves And the Reform wraths outgrabe. “Beware the Jenrickwock, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Kuenssberg, and shun The frumious Badenochsnatch!”
(To the tune of Puff The Magic Dragon..) #Grok The AI Chatbot Developed for X Takes quite decent images And turns them into sex It's little Elon's caper And some have had enough They want Ofcom to take it down For making dodgy stuff..
Suggested opening song for tonight's #Panorama - #Evri #WheresMyParcel Evri time they don't come by I die a little Evri time, they lie & lie I cry a little I need my 10L Compostable bin Liners When they change from 'We're nearly there' to 'Some other time', Argh! Evri's times? Pie in the sky..
Whoever arranged this draw is, ironically, a massive ballbag.. #WorldCup2026
In-store music in supermarkets provides no great salve for the monstrous costs and greedflation on display. However, if there has to be a soundtrack to one's ire at Tesco's latest mushy peas price-hike, then it could be worse than John Holt's, Help Me Make It Through The Night. I was almost jaunty.
This Budget has had a bigger build and more publicity than the Oasis reunion. After Weds they should take it on tour. Generate some extra revenue..
It's all new Singing With Squirrel! Me: Do you like punk/new wave, mixed with music hall-esque lyrical wordplay? Her: I don't know what any of that means. But you crack on, fella..
R-E-L-E-A-S-E - by Lammy Wynette His R-E-L--E-A-S-E came early today Him and another L-A-G got clean away Now they're on the run, because of what they've done In the past, Illegally Oh I can't believe this accidental R-E-L-E-A-S-E
It's not easy directing a squirrel and a monkey nut. And yet.. 'Dracula meets Autumnwatch' - Transylvania Bugle 'Scarier than when Twitter tried to cancel me' - Stephen King
Must have had a good night at the state banquet, I found him on the pavement this morning, looking quite chuffed with himself..
Coming up on tonight's episode of 'Singing With Squirrel'..
At first, I thought they said 'a conservative scottish MP has defecated to #Reform' Sounds about right..
I just saw the new Cadbury's ice-cream advert, and it exposed a horror story for our times.. hurstaka.wordpress.com/2025/08/25/i...
I Scream, You Scream..
I Scream, You Scream.. I saw an advert earlier today for a new Cadburys ice-cream. In it, a young lad opens a fridge, takes out an ice-cream carton, removes the lid, and sees it’s completely …
hurstaka.wordpress.com
I've never owned an apple corer before now. Feels quite grown up, but also slightly dangerous, like it could turn on you and put a hole through your hand..
