Sometimes when I'm anxious or sad, I get it in my head that bangs might make me feel better and I really need more people in my life to remind me that bangs are never the answer.

My mother really wanted to visit family in the upstate. Every relative who thought I was exaggerating or thought dementia patients were all like zany Aunt Bethany from Christmas Vacation is getting a crash course this week 🙄

KLUWE PLANS UNICORN HUGS TO CURE CANCER

FinTwitter@fintwitter.bsky.social · 14h ago

SPACEX PLANS MOON FACTORIES POWERED BY HUMANOID ROBOTS

Mitch McConnell is now the OG of 'Quiet Quitting' (life). We'll soon soon one of those 2022 'nO oNe wAnTs tO wOrK anYmOrE' signs on Capitol Hill.

I’m going through memory lane cleaning out the attic which I don’t advise but it was pretty funny to find this photo and have my husband guess the grade. He guessed third and was only off by six years.

Regarding the Perez Hilton situation: Amateur true crime podcasters on TikTok are not exactly wrapping themselves in glory this morning. They're selling their humanity for literal pennies

"actually my wife is the bad guy for taking our daughter to the doctor after i broke her collarbone" - Max Miller, who Trump says is a good guy

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · yesterday

Rep. Max Miller: "When I was reported for child abuse of my daughter for a broken collarbone, my daughter was in my ex-wife's care 9 out of the last 11 days and she took her to the emergency room, which is a contempt violation from our shared parenting plan."

Little kid: Small Wonder (absolute trash) Bigger kid: Strangers with Candy and MST3K (still love both)

1. Miracle Grow is garbage. There are far better gardening brands. 2. Trump's Miracle Grow message was underwritten by Carl's Junior and sponsored by Brawndo

Acyn@acyn.bsky.social · 2d ago

The President promotes Scotts Miracle-Gro in the middle of an Oval Office event: The best grass you can get. Scotts, you know Scotts? Scott's Miracle-Gro, they're doing it. They do great grass. I got to give him a plug because they did the White House for free.

To save face, Pirro will be allowed to say that she resigned to spend more time with her box of wine.

Forbes@forbes.com · 2d ago

President Donald Trump told reporters Monday afternoon that U.S. Attorney for the District of Columbia Jeanine Pirro “choked” and “folded like an umbrella” by dropping Reflecting Pool vandalism charges.

I hate taking my mother to the same neurologist I see because it lays bare just how disinterested the medical profession seems to be where meaningful, proactive care for dementia is concerned. If you're under 70, you get the red carpet. Over 70 and it's (maybe) pills and admonishments to not drive.

This clip is only missing the Pace Picante "New York City?!! cries. Whoever thought a disgraced former mayor of the populous city would resonate with a fairly small Midwestern population needs an advertising refresher course.

Jessy Edwards@jessyedwards.bsky.social · 2d ago

A video taken Saturday shows former NYC Mayor Eric Adams in sales pitch mode in Wisconsin Rapids, as he's heckled by residents opposed to the data center he's trying to sell them on. "My name is Eric Adams," he begins, as the boos begin to rain down. "You belong in prison!" one attendee shouts.

We’re all gonna die!

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 4d ago

BASH: How do you prepare for next pandemic? RFK Jr: We did almost everything wrong B: But what about now? K: We need to protect our rights B: ? K: During covid we dismantled our rights B: But I'm asking what *to* do K: You were part of the problem B: You want to sit here and attack me?

If the blogger had reached a little harder and called him a "Kremlin Gremlin" they would have been given the Medal of Freedom by the next non-MAGA president.

The New Republic@newrepublic.com · 4d ago

A federal judge has thrown out the FBI director’s lawsuit against a blogger who called him a “googly-eyed Kremlin bitch.” trib.al/oZwZMR9

Summary of my morning Youtube advertisement experience: "Come and Get Your (AI) Slop, Pay Piggy" would be an excellent tagline.

“Sandwich guy case” “Harvard clawed frog embryo smuggling case” “Olympic canoeist reflecting pool vandalism case” “James Comey seashells Instagram post case” New rule: If the case sounds like a Mad Libs story, it’s probably about to implode.

Any happiness I would ordinarily feel when trash like Pirro earns a richly deserved L is tempered by empathy and disgust for the legions of 'little guys' who find themselves the targets of malicious prosecution. Their time and expense represents both an injustice and a debt that won't be repaid.

The Tennessee Holler @thetnholler.bsky.social · 5d ago

⚡️ UPDATE — Total humiliation for Jeanine Pirro (And Trump)

Ep. 1: How to marinate roadkill to seal in juices Ep. 2: Digestive power hour with Taylor Farms Ep. 3: Goya Beans. How bad could they actually be? www.usatoday.com/story/news/p...

Exclusive: RFK Jr. hosting a new cooking show with celebrity chefs

HHS Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr., in an exclusive interview, says he will be 'reintroducing' Americans to cooking again in a new series.

usatoday.com

@crucialconflict.bsky.social Are you going to blame Penny for this one?

Multiple horse theory? Neigh Unitary horse theory? Yay

Ben Collins@bencollins.bsky.social · last wk.

TikTok has incredible moderation team. Our InfoWars video about Multiple Horse Theory — the idea that there are many horses in the world and not just one — has been fully deemed misinformation and lost the formal appeals process. Confirmed by Larry Ellison: There is only one horse on Earth.

30th anniversary today and to celebrate my husband decided to mow the law without bitching. If you consider that we live in a hot, humid hellhole that's quite the gift.

Sure, let's dive back into how Trump handled the defining crisis of his first term. Especially while he's flipping and flailing at every self made crisis in his second term.

Great. I just took a phone call with a relative who was dOiNg rEsEaRcH through Grok and has determined that statin drugs have caused my mother's dementia. Mom will be up there next week and this person wants to convince her to stop taking them.

I'm Ross Douthat I'm Catturd 2 I'm Alex Jones This is 60 Minutes.

Oliver Darcy@oliverdarcy.bsky.social · last wk.

Scoop: I’m told that Ross Douthat is exiting The NYT and is expected to take a role at “60 Minutes.” News expected to be announced soon.

What I wish the dentist said: You're brushing a bit too hard. Consider using the electric toothbrush exclusively. What the dentist said: Scrub 'em like they're teeth-not a toilet.

I haven't had a Reddit account ever since my incredibly awesome pear tree got downvoted to oblivion when it was just a sapling. Lurking has been more than sufficient but now it appears you need an account. The auto generated name chooser really did me dirty today. I'm never poasting with that one.

I'm in awe of the family response to a relative in the hospital due to cardiac complications from simple dehydration versus the 'buck up/suck it up/get back to work' response I got after have open...freaking...heart...surgery. If it weren't for double standards, me family would have no standards.

Mitch McConnell would like everyone to know that his family knew that a townhouse in the city wasn't fair to him. He's been sent to a place upstate where he can run, drink water from the stream, and chase rabbits all day.

Even on his deathbed, McConnell is stalling legislation. That's true commitment. www.yahoo.com/news/politic...

How Mitch McConnell’s absence is helping block Trump’s biggest priorities

Mitch McConnell has been hospitalized for weeks with his absence impacting the Senate’s work with no return date only months before his term ends.

yahoo.com