BREAKING LEX NEWS! Tony Stark named his nipples! The right one is called Charlie Chapnip. Left one is called Doctor Dotittle.
// Okay for context. Justin Trudeau, former Canadian Prime Minister, in his younger, dumber years, did black face for Halloween. He’s apologized countless times. He was Prime Minister for almost a decade He stepped down. Mark Carney is now the Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is dating Katy Perry
// Calling him Katy Perry’s boyfriend when he was prime minister for almost a decade
BREAKING LEXNEWS Tony Stank, much like Katy Perry’s boyfriend, has some explaining to do
// you know I kid but you know what I always found funny? Censorship on The Walking Dead TV show They could show people getting eaten alive or having their heads bashed into mushy puddles. Really violent shit But they aren’t allowed to say fuck. That’s a step too far
We’d like to apologize for the foul language. Anyways, back to the intense sex life of bloodthirsty violent aliens
LexCorp@lex-corp.bsky.social · last mo.LEXNEWS BREAKING NEWS SUPERGIRL HAS ORGIES IN WHIPPED CREAM TUBS WITH NINJAS, DINOSAURS, ROBOTS, AND SHARKS …what the fuck am I reading?
LEXNEWS BREAKING NEWS SUPERGIRL HAS ORGIES IN WHIPPED CREAM TUBS WITH NINJAS, DINOSAURS, ROBOTS, AND SHARKS …what the fuck am I reading?
Our PR department is run by Jon, Jon, Jon, Jon, Jon, Jon, John, Joan, and Jon. They are very hard workers
The following is meant for adult LexCorp customers only HARDLIGHT DILDOS! Cumming soon for sale to Legion of Dildo. And hopefully you will too.
We would like to address the rumors that Lex Luthor is the ruler of a far off alien planet. Lex Luthor is clearly too busy to be the most brilliant man on Earth to also be the grand ruler of another planet. He’d have to be in two places at once. These claims are ridiculous and absurd
Due to water damages caused by an alien attack, we are sad to announce that the Club L'Excellence located in Little Bohemia will be shut down until repairs and a criminal investigation are complete. Thank you for your patience
LEXNEWS Princess Supergirl demands to be called Princess! We will respect her decision and exclusively call her that! @karawot.bsky.social
We are good without the Web Weaver Mayo.
ᴠᴏᴜɢʜᴛ@voughtcorprate.bsky.social · 2mo agoAre your burgers subscription only or something? We provide the good American consumer with our juicy chicken breasts whenever their appetite calls for it! Sounds like a supply and demand issue for you guys at LexCorp. Also our mayo is creamier than yours.
Also we are LEXCORP. Not LuthorCorp LuthorCorp was LexCorp’s past. We do not speak of LuthorCorp.
We do indeed have those. But we don’t show the best of the breasts to just anybody. The sauce may be red, but we aren’t under any districts with red lights Only the most loyal customers can come to our beautiful succulent all American breasts and add any kind of sauce or toppings they want.
ᴠᴏᴜɢʜᴛ@voughtcorprate.bsky.social · 2mo agoIs this one made of 100% American pasture-raised chicken breast, drenched in hot sauce? We don’t think so.
BREAKING LEXNEWS SUPERGIRL CAUGHT ENDANGERING WHALES Multiple animal rights groups are infuriated Marine Biologist George Costanza brought to tears! We will keep you updated as news develops
𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐃𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐅 𝐊𝐑𝐘𝐏𝐓𝐎𝐍@fistofkrypton.bsky.social · 2mo ago<— lifting a whale out of the sea THE BIGGEST FISH
The best selling book is coming in audiobook form, read to you by Lex Luthor himself! Be sure to pick up your copy of A Better World. And while you’re out book shopping, be sure to buy Lex Luthor: Simply Brilliant as well! Physical copies and audiobooks can be purchased at LexBooks!
LexCorp is proud to say we love hiring women! LexCorp respects women! And pronouns!
LEXNEWS Supergirl attends BronyCon! Possibly to find new horse boyfriend? More details to come!
LexCorp, in collaboration with Hedare Beauty is proud to announce Beau-Lex, a cosmetic break through! Reverse the effects of age, stress, and sun!
Happy National Graham Cracker Day! Here at LexCorp, we love our crackers! Especially when we buy them in bulk at LexMart! Come in today for a free sample!
Become a LexMart Gold member and get 10% off every purchase and 30 times your rewards point on every purchase!