ProdnoseAsWas

@lordshortcake.bsky.social

Formerly famous fat head & farceur, inventor of the Zeelman Flay (pat. pending) and one half of Danny Kelly's Performing Rat Wonderland. Sole Ambassador for Threadgold's Thorough-Grip Garterettes Currently kicking the legs up here: patreon.com/dannybaker

As someone who doesn't follow Dr Who and who bailed out half way through Tom Baker's stint, here are people I think would have been really good Dr Whos. Barry Humphries William Mervyn David Nixon James Robertson Justice Victor Spinetti

Ten years ago an old bore, whenever a celebrity version of a show was announced, would say "Never heard of any of them!" It is a fairly legitimate claim now. TV has defenestrated itself of favourites. Warhol breve magnum.

My son was out in Soho today and saw a copy of the punk fanzine I was involved in 1977. £100! We put ourselves on the cover after CBS withdrew permission to feature Clash. See also me and Mark on TV at the time with not much idea what we were doing...but neither did anyone!

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Went for the second time to the excellent Bowie: You're Not Alone show at the Lightbox, Kings Cross. On the way out is a display of all his albums. OK, I kind of get why the first one is sort of sidelined, but how odd one crucial release is missing altogether:

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We are at that stage of the closed season where I read on Twitter things like: "Aston Villa have paid 22.5 million for Croation striker Tonči Glavina from Finnish Champions Veikkausliiga" And I go: What? Who? FYI: I just made that imagined transfer up...I think.

Just got in from seeing the revival of Jesus Christ Superstar. I first saw it 54 years ago when I was 15 and went about seven times subsequently. I was right to. It is still an absolutely mesmerising absorbing experience. Do go if you can.

Same people who this time last week were saying, "DR Congo are England's worst nightmare" are now busy scaremongering about Mexico. Meanwhile, our oppositions media are busy doing the same thing about us.

I think there is a night, possibly on Channel 5, where all the world's National Anthems get played and subjected to a viewer vote until we arrive at The Number One. The winning nation gets a £60 White Company voucher.

Village People singer/writer Victor Willis has died.I met him in New York in 1979 for an NME cover story. He was wry and realistic about his fame. The others, he explained, were good people but all replaceable dancers. He had a voice. Not too far off Levi Stubbs' if you listen.

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In Paperback Writer Paul sings: "It's a thousand pages, give or take a few I'll be writing more in a week or two..." If I were his editor I would have had to say, "No, no. no. Mate it's a paperback. Ease up, OK?"

I'm glad Gary Lineker looks comfortable on ITV. Hope he fares better than Morecambe & Wise when they crossed the floor. I must declare an interest here. He consulted me before making this momentous decision.

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