i think creatures could kick the asses of critters almost anytime

why is he taking us back to the past to play some shitty games that suck ass when he'd rather eat the rotten asshole of a roadkilled skunk or have a buffalo take a diarrhea dump in his ear? what was he THINKING????

this goblin is just living in peace. you do not have to block him.

User with this avatar just got blocked@avijustgotblocked.bsky.social · 2w ago

An account with this avatar was just blocked.

patient at ER: doctor, my blood pressure and pulse have been fluctuating wildly. i nearly fainted today for no reason. doctor: that sounds concerning. we will not measure your pulse or blood pressure. patient: *waits five hours* nurse: you just have fatigue, go away.

this is a good point and now i want to break their brains faster

vibe-free lifestyle and smiling apple purveyor@ellaguro.bsky.social · 3w ago

i'm sympathetic to the trans people out there who are like "i just want to live and to feel normal" but i really think we should be taking credit for breaking these guys' brains. they're mush. they're not coming back from this.

PATIENT: hi, i have signs of a rare medical condition. DOCTOR: well that can't be true because it's rare. i don't know how to help you, go away.

training my breasts to be more aerodynamic

i just got back from a trip to hell and it's only slightly colder back at home what the fuck

i think it would have been really fun to stab julius caesar

i wish windows was a leprechaun so i could batter to death it

my politics

being haunted by a watto toy from pizza hut that i threw away as a child

alright but we already learned that doesn't work would have been cooler if he started a militia

gotta love the mythical strawman white trans woman who works a secure white collar career and panic posts online who gets to serve as the eternal shorthand reason in the eyes of many why we're all annoying delusional people who don't have real problems, but also deserve whatever does happen to us

🌈Tyranny🫧Sparkles🏳️‍🌈@tyranny.sparklenoise.com · 3mo ago

a 19 year old trans woman was killed by being stabbed 40 times at UW in seattle Washington I don’t wanna hear anyone talking concern trolling shit about white trans women in “safe states” overreacting at what’s happening in the United States

i always offer to go along to my gf's doctor's appointments because doctors are so fucking worthless. there's no symptom they won't say is anxiety, no evidence they will accept, but if a man says "i've seen her have anxiety and this is something else" suddenly they're sherlock holmes

yesterday, i found a years old mcdonald's french fry between my car's seats and had the willpower to throw it away even though it was in perfect condition. nobody has congratulated me for this. what's the point of life..?

a whale can be a big spender in gambling, gaming, or cryptocurrency, a detestable water beast, or even brendan fraser. to a creative person, the whale is your oyster. -crossword puzzle designer wisdom

if this post gets a million likes, i will microwave my rat collection

this might be a bit scary, but you don't see doctors that often. it's fine. but if i had a baby named this, that would be a real problem...

guy in clown mask playing Papa Roach on guitar@conorhaloreach.bsky.social · 3mo ago

Imagine your doctor’s name was Evil Cunt

if i was a bird i would NOT ruin my voice every morning begging for sex. that's desperate. instead i would repeatedly slam myself into a window at full speed to meet that bird who's doing the same thing.

God's Will

the ominous echoes of a pseudo-xylophone reverberate through the threshold of my apartment door. this despite the constable assuring me that the skeletons, whose rhythmic rappings upon each other once amused me so, perished of buckshot a fortnight ago. i have filed another noise complaint.

yesterday, a knight errant born in the year 3642 stumbled from a time portal and caught his balance on my shoulders. seeing that he laid hands on a woman, he shot himself with a disintegration ray. i didn't feel anything, which goes to show how much less insecure i am about passing nowadays.

everytime i see this guy i'm thinking more men should use eyeliner

ella@dj90shentai.bsky.social · 4mo ago

calling this shit out as volkish needs to happen a lot more IMO

Parker Molloy@parkermolloy.com · 4mo ago

Slotkin is so gross with her "what works in the middle of the country will work on the coasts, but not in reverse" bullshit

Everyone who works for the NYT — including my many friends — should be incredibly embarrassed by this statement. The depths to which the NYT will go to back its agenda of challenging trans people's right to exist is horrifying, ongoing, and has caused very real and specific harms to trans people.

NYTimes Communications@nytimespr.bsky.social · 4mo ago

The New York Times’s body of reporting on the American Medical Association’s stance on gender-related care for minors is accurate and factual, and remains so despite the recent statement from the Chair of the A.M.A. Board, which contradicts the A.M.A.’s own statements. www.nytco.com/press/fact-c...

I always smile when I remember this 900 year old Sam & Max fanart, carved into some old twelfth century church in england

hillary can still win if we summon the nuckelavee and trap its dick in a doorframe. i haven't worked out the chain of causality, but that's definitely step 1.