Can't make shrimp fried rice? That's a krill issue.

Patrixmyth@patri.xyz · 3h ago

Can't cook burgers very well? That's a grill issue.

Hannibal Lecter isn't dead, he's just running a bit behind schedule.

this motherfucker said 'and to sipped'

"Amazon wants a 5 picture deal with a nobody to keep it cheap."

The Independent@the-independent.com · 9h ago

James Bond producer shares update on 007 casting: ‘It’s got to be really different’

fuck your sports

My first inclination was to make a snarky comment about Perez Hilton, but I took a second and looked at their recent activities, and they've been trying to be a better person. I wish them well and a swift recovery in all aspects involved in this.

Can't cook burgers very well? That's a grill issue.

We probably can't wholly replace oil companies with solar panels on every roof, but we can definitely cut their fucking profits.

Had a blatant cautionist dream where the path I took literally had skull symbols in the roadway and I still drove over the cliff edge, and as my scooter crashed down, I thought, well isn't this nice, and isn't it ironic... literally, the lyrics popped in my head before I woke myself up pre-impact.

The party split hasn't turned out to be in the Republican Party but between centrist and more democratic socialist aligned (not necessarily DSA, still Democratic Party aligned) candidates. With centrists peeling off disgusted Republicans, and DSists peeling off, well Democrats.

Arizona’s Democratic Governor Set to Pick a Republican Running Mate (Gift Article)

Gov. Katie Hobbs, locked in a competitive re-election battle, plans to tap a moderate former mayor of Mesa, Ariz., John Giles, to serve as her lieutenant governor if she wins in November.

nytimes.com

"you're gonna have to be more specific than that, Avery" no, I actually hate all of them equally

Training wasps to wrap all my presents.

despite all my feats I am still just a clown made of meat

bitecoin- for every hungry person you feed, there's a chance you'll be awarded a token. As the number of hungry people declines, the chances of receiving the token decreases until no one is hungry, at which point we'll all have a bunch of bitecoin, and there is no problem with this plan!

Maybe identification in general was a mistake.

Listening to an old Beastie Boys track and realizing this generation will never develop the self-reliance to independently rank and identify their best/favorite porno mag.

Logging into the bank portal does not mean smashing through the door glass with a tree branch. I know that now.

the CEO's comments could have been taken out of context, and bsky could have a problem with how it shelters 'desirable' accounts at the expense of 'undesirable' accounts, with an aspect of that problem being that there are accounts bsky finds 'undesirable'.

Ok, decided to use Gist instead of my blog. Current state of my firefox bsky filters with a little gear icon to foldup the filters.

violent monkey image and video filters for firefox web browser of bsky

violent monkey image and video filters for firefox web browser of bsky - script.txt

gist.github.com

I'm in a very angry silly mood.

We need a gun that shoots out wrapping paper based on how scifi monsters incapacitate their victims by spitting out quick hardening goo.

Maybe the friends we met along the way are the friends we met along the way.

Idaho shouldn't even have a national guard, they have half the population of the city of Los Angeles.

I hope she wins, and I hope every resident of Idaho gets a bill for $1.48 to pay it off to make it clear we're all responsible for what's done in our name.

NPR@npr.org · yesterday

Military veteran and D.C. resident Anna King has filed a $3 million lawsuit against the Idaho National Guard, saying three guard members assaulted her while detaining her in front of her home. n.pr/4wyjw9S

This is how I put on my pants after I bake sourdough.

JP@johnathanperk.bsky.social · last yr.

If you’ve never seen Ms. Tamara Walcott deadlift 641 pounds, I’d highly recommend watching this:

The surest bet in the world is that anybody who holds a press conference to say they're not going to resign is going to resign pretty soon.

announcer: Welcome, and I'd just like to thank you for agreeing to take part in our fun little video project 'Funny and Die!' contestant: Don't you mean 'Funny or D*Grizzly pedals on stage riding a unicycle*

You’re going to see a bunch of stories about free tuition at universities, and before you praise them, all I ask is you consult the spirits about the ‘small school exception’.

I try to be a good ally on class, race, sex, and gender. That doesn’t mean you should trust me. That means you should speak up when I’m fucking it up.

Please, performative bullshit is my father. Just call me an ally.