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Philip Michaels

@philipmichaels.bsky.social

This gun for hire if you need someone who can write pretty and make other people write pretty. Here, I mostly just talk about sports and movies and whatever's grinding my gears at the moment.

6441 Posts866 Follower95 Folgt
Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 22h ago

The circle of life "Ah well, guess I better eat some fish." "Cooking fish sucks. Why did I decide to eat fish." "Wow that fish turned out pretty good. I should eat more fish." "Oh no -- fish on the menu again?" And repeat.

Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 2d ago

Imagine working for Arte Moreno — too far from heaven so that God can’t hear your cries — having a way out and not immediately saying “Oh yes please, there’s just going to be a cloud-shaped version of me here come October.”

J.P. Hoornstra@jphoornstra.bsky.social · 2d ago

John Mozeliak was asked if he wants to stay with the Angels in a permanent role. “It’s been fun. In terms of what I want to do, I don’t know the answer to that yet.” Mike Trout wasn’t going anywhere at the deadline so Mo said he invited Trout into the Angels’ “trade room.”

Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 2d ago

At the doctor’s, checking in for a routine procedure: Staffer: Do you have a health care directive? Me: Uh… I don’t… Wife: Yes. He does. He’s DNR. Me: (exaggerated outrage) WAIT, WHAT? The comedy stylings of Schmeiser and Michaels, folks.

Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 4d ago

Love when I cancel a subscription and getting an email that's basically, "Hey, your subscription was mysteriously cancelled, clearly that's a mistake, you want us to fix that for you?" And I'm like, "Nah, buddy, our business is concluded, it's not like you were selling oxygen, you know?"

Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 5d ago

At a certain point, the practice of making grandiose charges only to quietly mutter "Uh, never mind" when you think no one's paying attention should result in future grandiose charges being treated with more skepticism at the outset.

Scott MacFarlane@macfarlanenews.bsky.social · 5d ago

FLASH: Justice Dept seeks to dismiss Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool criminal case against former Olympian David Hearn Trump Admin acknowledges: "Damage to the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool in June 2026 was the result of flawed installation by the contractor"

Philip Michaels@philipmichaels.bsky.social · 7d ago

My AI Slop-loving Facebook connection likes to share three common ideas with their posts: 1) Kids today need to go to trade school 2) The olds are full of wisdom and today's entry 3) Things were better before we had personal technology.

Charlie Brown is saying "Be honest: Would you walk away from smartphones and social media to go back to the 1970s?" His words are making Snoopy ponder things. On one side, the Peanuts gang frolics outdoors; on a grimmer side of the screen, young people have their faces buried in phones.