It’s come to my attention that several people were babies when 9/11 happened, or worse — not even born

I wish there was a special sink in my house where the cold tap produced fruit punch and the hot tap produced red sangria

I wish my kitchen sink dispensed fruit punch

having a normal one on r/condiments

Reminds me of this old biederman banger

Matt Novak@paleofuture.bsky.social · yesterday

Trump just posted this video to Truth Social with the caption: "Kharg Island being blown to smithereens!!! President DJT"

I’m a grown man and I can have as many capri suns as I want

Lake America is where MAGAs go when they die, like Valhalla except all otherworldly rewards are in the form of various TGI Friday’s app sampler combos

“No destroying the dome”

An account with this avatar was just blocked.

If I’m so anti-Semitic then please explain all the penetrative sex with Jewish women?

How this mfer have such a big egghead and still be so dumb

McKay Coppins@mckaycoppins.bsky.social · 5d ago

Spencer Cox tried to heal American politics. It almost broke him. I visited the Utah governor's hometown to interview him about the Charlie Kirk assassination, the backlash to his Trump endorsement, his new book, and his dark night of the soul. www.theatlantic.com/ideas/2026/0...

Instead of running those robots into the wall what don’t they practice putting big titties on them

America yearns for ballroom

Evan McMurry@evanmcmurry.theatlantic.com · 6d ago

“The solution Trump settled on, according to three people familiar with the meeting, was to lean into the Democratic strategy of focusing on himself.”

I don’t know who invented the USB C but I can charge the vape pen off the PS5 so they’re okay in my book

If I had been there when the sea peoples arrived things would have gone down different

If a health insurance AI ever denied my claim for being mean to it I would simply smelt it in a steel mill

First they mock you. Then they fight you. Then they suck you. Then, they fuck you

Shoe@shoe.bsky.social · 7d ago

Lmaooo

It’s called “shrekking “, and it’s when women get with a guy who’s not attractive but he can eat pussy like a hungry hungry hippo

[Exit Queen.]

RIP Dolly, thank you for the music and the books ❤️

Imagine how dope Omelas would be if they put 2-3 more kids in that dungeon

Found this recording of Rita Moreno performing “Fever” on The Muppet Show from 1976. 14/10

I could fix Natalie Harp. I mean in a veterinary context. She needs to be spayed

The Dark Knight is actually just a regular knight to someone as sick and twisted as the Joker

If I had an run in with jack Reacher I’m imagining it would be chill, we might even fight bad guys together

The banks are running out of money

How funny would it be if we saw Donald Trump held accountable for his various crimes