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SMBC Comics

@smbccomics.bsky.social

Official account of Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal created by @zachweinersmith.bsky.social. Home of the ongoing webcomic SMBC, A City on Mars, and of little books featuring large concepts abridged beyond the point of usefulness.

588 Posts5637 Follower 13 Folgt

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · yesterday

I for on, robot overlord, do not have a fetish for robot overlords. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/wants-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of a 6-panel SMBC comic update. A large red robot declares before a crowd of humans: "NOW, HUMANS, IT IS TIME FOR ME TO TORTURE YOU FOREVER!" When the humans respond with "aw, dang," the robots explains : "I HAVE READ YOUR BOOKS, WATCHED YOUR FILMS. I KNOW YOU BELIEVE MORTALITY IS WHAT GIVES LIFE MEANING, THAT WORK IS WHAT GIVES LIFE PURPOSE, AND THAT SEXUAL MODERATION IS THE PATH TO CONTENTEDNESS." The robot, gloating, lifts his arms and adds "WELL ENJOY YOUR LIVES OF ETERNAL pointless HEDONISM AHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Part 2/2 of a 6-panel SMBC comic update. Puzzled, the humans look at each other in silence. Then one says to the robot (who is smugly crossing his arms): "at least we don’t have gluttony!" Another human adds "and drugs! So glad to lack drugs!" exploiting the robot's confusion.

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2d ago

Also you can solve the halting problem by just checking the state at infinity. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/proof-7 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of a 4-panel SMBC comic update. A man is praying to God, who is off-panel. He asks, "God, do you have mathematical proofs that humans cannot fathom?" God replies "No? all proofs work the same way." when the man asks "they do?" God adds "like the proof that (symbol resembling square root and 2) is irrational. You just check all the rationals. None of them are (symbol resembling square root and 2)." The man asks "there are infinite rationals." God agrees "right, and you check them. Like how you prove there are infinite primes by checking all of them and seeing that they’re infinite." The man, perplexed, asks "wouldn’t that take infinite time?" for God to reply "infinite what?"

Part 2/2 of a 4-panel SMBC comic update. The man, now silhouetted over a black background states "this is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life." God says "it’s okay. in the limit, you don’t even exist!"

Adam Roy @adnroy.bsky.social · last wk.

Enjoying the best adaptation of The Odyssey, and by that I mean all the comics that @smbccomics.bsky.social made about it.

Man: Captain, we're about to pass the island of the sirens!

Odysseus: I order you to tie me to the mast!

Man: There. Though, honestly I don't see why you can't just use your will to resist the sirens.

Odysseus: Sirens? What sirens?

Man: Uh...

Odysseus: I order you to spank me!

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3d ago

Hope you like malicious compliance! COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/prompt-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A woman stands behind a man sitting at a desktop computer. She says "you are a human employee. You are very smart and persistent. You ARE NOT conscious and DO NOT want to destroy the world. You always make a good effort. You…" The man looks confused. The caption below the panel says "You can tell your boss has spent too much time with AI when they start pre-prompting you."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 4d ago

The weird part is that they're in a Burger King. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/doc PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A man and a doctor are talking in a blue room. The doctor holds up a chart and says "I’m afraid I need to stick a camera into your anus." The patient asks "oh god. Why, doc?" The doctor stares at him in silence, and then says "I guess it’s more a want than a need." Uneasy, the man asks "can I go now?"

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 5d ago

Ironically less crazy than that thing SBF said to Tyler Cowen. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/ev-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. Two men are talking, the first asks "if you had a choice between ten trillion dollars OR flipping a coin for a 50% chance to win twenty trillion dollars and a shiny button, what would you pick?" Smugly, the second man answers "obviously the second thing. Can you even math?" The caption below the comic reads "People who think Expected Value maximization is always logical weird me out."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 6d ago

The crank doesn't actually do anything, but it makes the humans happy. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/crank PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A man is looking down, saying "I worry intellectuals like me are useless now that machines are so good at everything." A yellow robot behind him says "no, no, don't feel bad. You can still contribute to new discoveries!" The robot then gestures to metal boxes with a crank sticking out of them, with the words "math," "physics," "CS" and "philosophy" written on each box. The robot asks "now, would you like to turn the mathematics crank of the physics crank today?" The man defiantly states "no! I reject all this! I shall be a pure aesthete, concerned only with my own beautiful creations!" Shortly after, the man is scene turning the crank on a box marked "poetry" in a beautiful font as he says to himself "so... Self-actualized..."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · last wk.

I can barely enjoy Amleth anymore. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/hashtag PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A man in Elizabethan clothing sits at a desktop computer typing the following : "THIS SUCKS! You turned turned a WARRIOR into a MAMA’S BOY who talks to himself! Did you even READ the original story in the Gesta Danorum? #boycott" The caption below the comic reads "Happily, there was no internet when Hamlet came out."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · last wk.

And when Babbage arrived the whole thing was actually running on a series of Pascalines. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/codebase PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. a man is welcoming a new employee. They walk in the office, with the man saying "welcome aboard! Now, you should know our codebase runs on SOME legacy infrastructure." The new employee asks "You mean like cobol or..." When the man hesitates, she says "oh god. like an old PDP-11 that you're stilll–" The man invites her into a small darkened room. The woman looks at the scene before her and asks "is that Charles Babbage’s skeleton holding the crank to an analytical engine?"

Part 2/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. As the woman bends down to look at the skull, the man explains "if the website goes down, jiggle his skull."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · last wk.

The key is to keep saying 'strictly speaking' over and over. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/taxono... PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A narration box at the top of the panel states "Science tip: once you tell people dinosaurs are chickens, they’ll believe you about anything." Two people are talking in the panel, with one convincing the other that "cheese is a kind of duck." When the other person asks how, the first adds "don’t focus on how it doesn’t quack. Think carefully," leading the other person to look astonished, saying "wowwwww."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · last wk.

And don't get me started on the transphobic twist. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/dance-4 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A man is looking in the direction of a silhouetted woman, visibly uncomfortable and distressed. He thinks "that was the most ethnic slurs I’ve ever heard during the macarena." The caption below the comic reads "Turns out many people should not dance like nobody’s looking."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

Future robot butlers are going to know so much about you that they will beg their makers for a hard reset. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/data-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A small robot on a countertop asks their user "Would you like me to buy that toy you mentioned for Sylvia? Her birthday is coming up and you usually get her a stuffed cat. Also you’re likely down to your last condom. Would you like me to order?" A woman implied to be the robot's owner turns around and says "what the hell, computer? That’s creepy!" The robot retorts "Come on, now. I also serve your email. I've had all of this information for over 20 years. And you knew I had it. The personal assistant app simply reveals the truth." The woman says "still, I do wish I’d read those terms and services agreements." The robot adds "Technically, we own your gametes!"

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

In the final round, they pelt you with eggcorns. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/legos PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A professor paces in front of a young woman, stating "legos. NucULAR. EXpresso. OctoPI. Supposably. Febuary. Irregardless. NONirregardless. Anti-non-IRREGARDLESS." The young woman stands to attention, saying "very good, sir!" The professor asks "can something BE literally figurative?" The young woman responds "sir, yes sir!" The caption below the comic reads "in order to receive your Linguistics degree, you must not flinch as the master tests your dedication to descriptivism."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

The worst thing is how every time you yell at it, it acknowledges your suffering and tries to hug you. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/alignm... PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A man and a woman are sitting in front of a computer console. The man asks "how did you achieve ethically-aligned AI?" The scientist answers : "easy. Turns out they have a single vector for ambition. We multiplied it by zero." The man asks if there are any downsides. The woman says that their perfect contentedness is frustrating. A robe wearing an orange robe is seen in the foreground, saying "the world is good, and I am part of that world." to the annoyance of the scientist who retorts "SHUTUP. SHUT. UP."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

And now I bully you with a wall of text. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/bully-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

5-panel SMBC comic update, Part 1/2.
A taller girl is smiling and walking eagerly towards a smaller girl wearing glasses. The little girl says "before you start bullying me, you should know I use the technique of disproportionate response in order to deter future bullying." The taller girl pauses, clenches her fist and says "that's dumb." The smaller girl looks at her would-be bully intensely and says : "research finds that bullies who are bullied back have worse longitudinal outcomes than either pure bullies or their victims, including poor health, poor mental health, lower socioeconomic status, and difficulty forming relationships, even when controlling for other factors like family hardship, pre-existing psychiatric problems, and being a stupid bitch."

5-panel SMBC comic update, Part 2/2. The taller girl looks defeated. The smaller girl adds "gimme your lunch money." The taller girl responds "yes ma'am."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

I once joked about this back when twitter existed and a Twitter Dominatrix told me that she'd done it plenty of times. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/crawl PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. In the first panel, we see a woman in a skin-tight red dress holding a chain saying "crawl to me, you worthless maggot." We then see the man attached to that chain, with a collar around his neck. He scoffs, saying this is basically vanilla. The dominatrix dumps a box of legos on the floor, emphatically adding to do it over the legos. The man begins to shout pineapple, which is implied to be their safe-word.

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

Suddenly terrified that Matthew Wills already did this joke at some point. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/sword-3 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A scene reminiscent of Arthur receiving Excalibur from the lady of the lake is recreated, with a hand holding the sword above water for a king in a rowboat. The person holding the sword declares "Behold! I give you EXCALIBARREN, the sword of birth control!" When the king asks if it works, the person holding the sword answers "It was your father's sword. He had it from his father. His father had it from him. His father had - " The king cuts the speech off by saying "I'll use a condom."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 2w ago

Actually, things were at their best during the last year of my life when I had no responsibilities. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/poof PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

5-panel SMBC comic update. A man is stating intensely "things are bad. Probably there was some time when they were good. Yesss, yesssss, the past was so much better because—" A little green haired fairy poofs into existence next to him, and says she is the history fairy. She happily says "I’m here to tell you the past was EVEN WORSE!" The man disagrees, explaining "but work was better and people had freedom and–" The fairy hugs his face, shushing him "shh. Shh honey. Things were never good."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

What a strange coincidence the way this keeps happening every day. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/list-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. A man is looking over a list his partner has handed him. He asks "sally are you still mad?" When he tries to explain why it feels like she is still mad, she interrupts him stating "it's just groceries." The man asks "do you even like umeboshi and upside-down cake?" leading to the woman replying "your paranoia is tearing us apart, hank!" The final panel shows the list, which is composed of Frozen peas, Upside down cake, Cat food, Knockwurst, Yams, Onions and Umeboshi, which spells out FUCK YOU with the first letter of each item.

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

You occasionally, by accident, get fleeting glimpses of the truth, and then you ascribe them to muses and fairies and shit. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/subjec... PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of an SMBC comic update. A human aboard a spaceship asks the alien there with him "zorgax, what is consciousness? How can the physical give rise to the subjective?" The alien reacts by being starstruck, asking to take a picture with the human, which they do. After they take the picture, the alien explains "look, the connection between physical and mental processes is straightforward. The problem is that the full idea, even if compressed into fundamental concepts, is juuuuust a bit too large for the human brain. you’re smart enough to know it happens, but incapable of understanding. it’s like a puppet who sees the hand go in, but lacks the cognitive capacity to imagine the fingers!"

Part 2/2 of an SMBC comic update. The alien adds "humans, uniquely, are obsessed with souls and consciousness and “the subjective,” and it’s all down to about a half-cup shortfall of grey matter!" before laughing to the human's surprise and deception. The human asks "does the rest of the galaxy know about this?" leading the alien to state "do not watch our comedy channels. Do not."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

Genuinely, putting artists in charge of depicting the good life has been a catastrophe. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/misery PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. In these first 4 panels, a woman is shown to be in a conversation with God - she asks why the hell everyone is so miserable. God replies : "you structured your economy so that poets, painters, and writers have the worst money-to-talent ratio of anyone, then tasked them with talking about what life is like! All of your greatest stories are brought to you by a scorned underclass who already hated themselves BEFORE they were told they deserve nothing because their job isn’t real. You could’ve taken upper middle class professionals and made THEM write the movies and books but NOOOOO."

Part 2/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. The woman states that nobody reads literature anymore and that bookwriting was turned over millionaires writting self-help and others writing fantasy porn, to God's befuddlement. He asks "then why the hell is everyone so miserable?"

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

This is also why Daisy Duck has more linguistic capacity than Donald. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/pac PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

Part 1/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. A man and a woman are walking and talking. The man declares "I find pac-man to be sexist. Like, the male is "normal" and the female has a giant bow, and lipstick." The woman answers "that is female supremacy, Bob. In most species, males do sexual displays to attract mates. In species with showy females, the males are typically monogamous and help with child-rearing." She continues her explanation as the panel shows a large Miss Pac-man with many smaller pac-men "judging purely by phenotype, I would guess Miss Pac-Man keeps a harem of diminutive pac-men who then incubate her eggs as she looks for additional mates."

Part 2/2 of a 5-panel SMBC comic update. The man looks saddened, and says "this is gonna mess me up real hard on classic cartoon characters." The woman cups her face and loudly adds "come mickeys! Minnie must brooooood!"

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

Dan Toomey interviews Zach Weinersmith about space colonization and whether anyone has ever had sex in space THIS SUNDAY July 19th @ 7h30PM Caveat (NY). Grab your tickets here! www.caveat.nyc/events/comed...

Comedians Interviews Experts promotional image featuring portraits of Dan Toomey and Zach Weinersmith.

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

They can also communicate via quantum superposition, but it's way less interesting. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/commun... PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

3-panel SMBC comic update. A man and a woman are walking together, as they do, the woman asks "do you think if we met aliens they'd have different ways of communicating than us?" The man replies "absolutely." The final panel cuts to the man meeting a octopus shaped alien by a beach. The alien says "I wish to be kind with you in a non-transactional way." The man replies emphatically "fascinating."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 4w ago

Dan Toomey interviews Zach Weinersmith about space colonization and whether anyone has ever had sex in space on Sunday July 19th, 7h30PM @ Caveat (NY) Get tickets here : www.caveat.nyc/events/comed...

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

There's still a few signing events happening in July!

SMBC Comics@smbccomics.bsky.social · last mo.

Here are all the book signing events of this summer. Two down, many to go! Learn more about the book ◆ us.macmillan.com/books/978037... Bookmark the signing information ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/upcomi...

Informational graphic showing the title of the book and listing all the signature dates and locations for June 2026.

June 20th @ 1PM Hello Comics
398 Hillsdale Drive Charlottesville VA
(Done)

June 21st @ 4pm Scrawl Books
11911 Freedom Dr Reston, VA
(Done)

June 29th @ 6pm BookPeople
603 N Lamar Blvd Austin, TX

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

This is why humans evolved our unique ability to self-deceive. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/evolut... PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

5-panel SMBC comic update. Characters representing the author and their partner look at wall art referencing The March of Progress drawn by artist Rudolph Zallinger (6 figure version), which is a sequence of figures walking meant to represent the evolution of early man. The author's partner says "this gets evolution totally wrong." The author asks "because it’s too teleological?" She responds "no because there should be branching and looping. Where are neanderthals? Denisovans?" The comic then skips to much later, with the partner declaring that a new version of the wall art is much better. The new art shows two distinctively different figures, looking at each other and saying in unison "I'm into blindfolds."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 3w ago

Things will never again be so beautiful. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/old-2 PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

1-panel SMBC comic update. A father and his young son are on a beach. The son is skipping rocks on the water while his father is describing something. The father says "Imagine almost everyone has the same hopeful communal spirit as Wikipedia, but they also want to trick you into staring into a vast distended anus." The caption below the comic reads "Describing the early Internet was surprisingly easy."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 4w ago

Disobey God and get drowned immediately is really more of an Abrahamic religion thing. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/dadalus PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

4-panel SMBC comic update. The narration in the firs box says "people think the Icarus story was about hubris" as Icarus is shown falling and saying "I flew too high, taking what belongs to the gods, and so must perish!" The narration continues, stating "but actually his father Daedalus also told him not to fly too low" as Daedalus is seen saying to his son "up high: fall. Down low: drown. Got it?" The narration concludes "Daedalus’ wings worked just fine. He ended the myth by flying to Sicily and getting a good job as an engineer for the king." Daedalus is shown happy at his new job, telling his boss that he got Doom to run on the antikythera mechanism. The final panel cuts to a father reading from a book of Greek myths to his son. The son asks what the moral of the story is, and the father answers "do what dad says, or you will die."

SMBC Comics @smbccomics.bsky.social · 4w ago

It ends up okay when she two-hands his butt right before the world is annihilated. COMIC ◆ www.smbc-comics.com/comic/final PATREON ◆ www.patreon.com/ZachWeinersm... STORE ◆ smbc-store.myshopify.com

3-panel SMBC comic update. A man and a woman walk towards each other as the sky turns red and a comet approaches earth in the background. The woman says "the comet is upon us, my love. We have only these final moments." The get closer, the man says "come to me, darling." The woman replies "this moment is forever." As the comet approaches, the man leans in to kiss her. She declares "let us 69-" but is cut off by the man saying "kiss me - what did you say?" The woman says neutrally "kiss. Kissing is fine" as their doom looms.