Tessera

War and Peas 🧿

@warandpeas.bsky.social

🌹 Comics by Elizabeth Pich & Jonathan Kunz 🌹 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/warandpeas All Links: https://warandpeas.start.page Shop: https://warandpeas.com/shop/

1662 Posts39574 Follower 267 Folgt

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · yesterday

You were put on this earth to shake what your mama gave you, but instead, you’re staring at a spreadsheet, wondering how many more years until retirement. We understand your pain and distilled it into this glittering, holographic sticker that’s tragic and iconic at the same time.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2d ago

A friendship can be sincere and transactional at the same time. Ask a cat.

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A robot shoots laser beams from its eyes across a living room while a delighted black cat named Nibbles chases the red dots, laughing, "Ahahaha." Panel 2: The robot turns and asks earnestly, "Nibbles, be honest... Why do you really hang out with me?" Panel 3: The cat looks up sincerely and answers, "What do you mean? You're my friend and I love you very much." Panel 4: Then Nibbles goes right back to swatting at the laser and adds, "But let's keep those lasers coming."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4d ago

Good Mood

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A smiling man strolls into the office with a briefcase and calls out, "Morning, Barb!" Panel 2: A woman at her computer answers flatly, "Morning, Carl." Panel 3: She frowns and wonders to herself, "Why is he always in such a good mood?" Panel 4: The man walks off with a wide, blissful smile, thinking, "I hate it at home."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 6d ago

Couples who haunt together, stay together.

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A ghost wakes with a startled "GASP" in bed and cries, "Honey, I had a dream you died!" Panel 2: The other ghost calmly replies, "Sweetie, we're already dead." Panel 3: Nuzzling their partner, they add, "We were murdered by that crazy axe killer, remember?" Panel 4: Reassured, the first ghost sighs, "Oh, right... what a relief," as the couple drifts back to sleep beneath a crescent moon.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · last wk.

Putting art on your wall transforms those ordinary moments when you're just walking past into tiny moments of joy – like discovering a twenty in an old jacket, except it happens every single time you notice it.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · last wk.

Another comic that made a content violation on Webtoon because of "rear nudity"

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4w ago

TURD NOW!

7-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A couple relaxes in a wooden hot tub when a "Plopp" rings out; the man asks the woman, "W-was that you?" Panel 2: She says, "What? No... someone must've..." as a small turd bobs in the water. Panel 3: Cut to a cheerful salesman in an infomercial: "Welcome to Turd in a Pool. Our service is simple," beside the number 1-800-TURD-IN-A-POOL. Panel 4: He explains, "We will discreetly place a turd in a pool." Panel 5: "Why, you ask? Why not?!" Panel 6: Pointing at the camera, he adds, "Don't ask how we do it. Just call our toll-free number and say Turd Now!" Panel 7: A branded Turd-in-a-Pool helicopter hovers over a house, lowering an operative on a cable to complete the job.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · last wk.

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A cheerful ladybug picks on a young mantis in a cap and backpack named Timmy and gasps, "Oh my God, Timmy, look!" Panel 2: In the grass lies a headleass praying mantis mate, who did not survive the night. Panel 3: The ladybug grins and says, "Looks like someone got lucky last night." Panel 4: Timmy forces a nervous, sweating smile and laughs, "Yeah... hahahaha..."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

We all know the internet's algorithm overlords have decided they get to curate your digital life. Our newsletter is different. It's the antidote to algorithmic paternalism. Every week, at least one new funny strip appears in your inbox like a tiny comic relief to your everyday stress.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

5-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A witch carries her worn-out broom into "Ye Ol' Broom Shoppe," where a green, fanged witch clerk remarks, "That thing's got a lotta mileage." Panel 2: The witch explains, "Yeah, my girlfriend and I went to Transylvania to meet her folks." Panel 3: The clerk grins, "Oh, got yourself a vampire girlie, huh?" Panel 4: The witch asks, "You think we could put a padded seat in the back or something?" Panel 5: The witch flies through the clouds on her broom, which now has a cozy padded canopy seat on the back where her vampire girlfriend lounges comfortably, reading.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4mo ago

4-panel comic by War and Peas Panel 1: A woman with black hair in a bun, wearing a black dress, stands against a red background, gesturing as she speaks. She says, "Ok, girls. You really need to show our guests more affection." Panel 2: She continues, "Sit on their lap, let them touch you a bit." Panel 3: She says, "Rub against their leg. You know the drill." Panel 4: The reveal: the woman is inside a cat café. Several cats of different colours sit on chairs and tables around the room. A "CAT CAFE" sign is visible reversed on the window. One black cat (Lord Nibbles) says, "I quit."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4mo ago

6-panel comic by War and Peas Panel 1: Inside a car at night. A vampire drives. Fuzzy dice and a tree air freshener hang from the mirror. The vampire says, "Don't look but I think we're being followed." Panel 2: The passenger (Slutty Witch) turns around, alarmed. She says, "Oh, fuck! Not again!" Panel 3: Outside view: a giant purple spider with green joints and multiple eyes chases the car down a dark road. Panel 4: Inside the car. Slutty Witch, now wearing sunglasses sips a drink. She says, "I told you to take off that damn bumper sticker!" The vampire grips the wheel, unamused. Panel 5: Close-up of the car's rear. A yellow bumper sticker reads "SPIDERS ARE FRIENDS" Panel 6: The giant spider chases the car across a mountainous landscape. The spider calls out, "Wait! Are you guys into tap dancing!?"

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2mo ago

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A pink worm stands at a podium before a crowd of insects. "Welcome to this year's Bug Conference." Panel 2: Close-up of the worm at the podium. "Firstly, the stick bug would like to remind everyone, they're not a coat rack." Panel 3: A stick bug stands in a spotlight, covered in hats, coats, scarves, and accessories hung on every limb. Panel 4: Close-up of the stick bug resigning: "Thanks, Janet."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: In an exam room, a masked doctor sits at the foot of a chair where a witch reclines for a check-up and says, "Ok, let's see." Panel 2: A bat suddenly flies out from under the sheet and the startled doctor throws up his hands, shouting, "WHOA!" Panel 3: As the bat flaps away, the doctor remarks, "It must've been a while." Panel 4: The witch replies, "Oh no, that was just my boyfriend."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

Oh, to be a cow...

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

New exclusive comic straight from our sketchbook. On Patreon (Extras level and above): www.patreon.com/warandpeas

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

This comic was banned on Webtoon for nudity

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: A tired office worker at a desk with a computer and charts thinks, "I wish I'd followed my passion and become an artist." Panel 2: An artist painting at an easel thinks, "I wish I had gone into a more financially stable profession." Panel 3: A split panel shows both of them side by side, each wistful and longing for the other's life. Panel 4: A vast, empty landscape of mountains and sky stretches out beneath the words "The end."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

First Grim Reaper comic

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: The Grim Reaper cruises across a field on a skateboard, scythe in hand, cape billowing behind it. Panel 2: The Reaper leans toward a couple of kids and dares them, "Bet you can't do a kickflip over the shark tank." Panel 3: A confident boy in a yellow shirt and cap steps onto his board beside a tank full of circling shark fins and grins, "Betcha I can, old man!" Panel 4: A close-up of the Grim Reaper, quietly delighted, as it says, "I love my job."

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 2w ago

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: An industrial building with a glowing sign reads "Dams Inc.," smokestacks puffing behind it. Panel 2: A hugely muscular beaver kicks open the CEO's office door, flexing, and shouts, "Time for sweet payback!" as the startled boss yelps, "Ah!" Panel 3: The buff beaver grabs the terrified executive, cackling "Muahahaha" and declaring, "You like being spanked, Mr. Big Dam!" Panel 4: The scene cuts to a bedroom, where the sweating man lies awake beside his wife, who sighs, "Oh, honey, was it Buff Beaver again?"

Zach Weinersmith @zachweinersmith.bsky.social · 3w ago

Too bad they never made any Star Wars prequels or sequels. Probably for the best.

Marko (Nerd and Jock Comics)@markoraassina.bsky.social · 3w ago

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

4 panel comic by War and Peas. 1. Panel: Two aliens look through the window of a house. One of them goes, "This must be the alpha species of the planet." 2. Panel: They present an alien gift to an orange cat who sits on the top of a couch and say "We come in peace." 3. Panel: The alien gift sits next to the cat who looks at the it. 4. Panel: The cat pushes the gift off the couch.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

Webtoon is one of the most horrific example for enshittification.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

We've got greeting cards for every occasion: divorce, the birth of a child or when you're friend finally quits their toxic job. And then there are cards for when nothing has happened at all: when no one was born or quit or anything and you simply thought of someone on a Tuesday and wanted to say so.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

Happily Forever After

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: In a public restroom, the Grim Reaper strides toward a man washing his hands, thinking, "Your time has come" while a strip of toilet paper trails from the Reaper's own shoe. Panel 2: The cheerful man points and says, "Hey, pal. You got some toilet paper on your shoe there." Panel 3: The Reaper glances down and mutters, "Uhm... Thanks." Panel 4: As the man strolls out into the sunshine, the embarrassed Reaper quietly crosses his name off a long list.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 3w ago

"The opposite of fascism is neither socialism nor communism. The opposite of fascism is democracy. Anti-fascism is democracy."

Mel Aura@melaura.bsky.social · 3w ago

So sieht es aus!

„Das Gegenteil von Faschismus ist nicht Sozialismus und auch nicht Kommunismus. Das Gegenteil von Faschismus ist Demokratie. Antifaschismus ist Demokratie.“
– Selda Kaya

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4w ago

TURD NOW!

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4w ago

How to Befriend a Fly

A whimsical illustration of a large red spider with long, thin arching legs and big round white eyes, hunched over an open book on the grass. The spider is intently reading a chapter; the book's page reads "How to befriend a fly" and shows a small sketch of a fly alongside lines of text. Two pale blue crayon-drawn clouds float in the sky above.

War and Peas 🧿@warandpeas.bsky.social · 4w ago

4-panel comic by War and Peas. Panel 1: The Grim Reaper, scythe in hand, appears in a bathroom where a person is sitting on the toilet, and they cry, "Oh no, not like this!" Panel 2: The Reaper politely says, "Ok, I'll wait," and steps out. Panel 3: He peeks back around the door and asks, "Number one or number two?" Panel 4: The Grim Reaper sits patiently on a stool in the hallway, scythe propped beside him, calmly reading a magazine while waiting.

GroovyShelly @groovyshelly.bsky.social · 4w ago

I'd love to credit whoever wrote this. No idea. But I'm 100% with its message. When I think of how the '80s ethos, "Greed is Good" has metastasized, it surprises and depresses me. Imagine having so many millions, hundred of millions, even billions & caring about nothing except your own vanity.