Return of the Cmonmacques
@cmonmaque.bsky.social
Un éléphant. Pour de vrai.
Ashley Madison is the new Facebook. Welcome to the world of one night only.
gwen howerton@kissphoria.bsky.social · 2h agoi'm locked in on this film sorry to anyone else
Coming from a small town I know what it's like to have a terrible secret that we don't share with outsiders on the night of a full moon...
Of course, how could I be so blind. The robots are going up there to throw moon rocks at us
Granted I'm not smart enough to be a SpaceX investor but if I was, I think I would have questions about why you need humanoid robots working in factories on the moon, presumably making things that would need to get shipped back to earth
It's one thing to have bad opinions on here, whatever, but I really don't want to hear about how antisemitic al-Sayed is from people paying the world's richest Nazi so they have extra characters to tweet about it
I didn’t put any word on my bingo card. That’s not how bingo works. You’re all gonna lose bigly at the rec Center
Me on my talk show: "So what do you think the deal was with that sock puppet, 'Jericho', on Oz?" Daniel Day Lewis: "I'm not sure I don't watch television" Me: "No yeah I totally understand. Say, what did you think about that madame web" DDL: "I've brought a pair of shoes I made" Me: "Fantastic"
Grotesque Man Eating Nom Nom
Alt: Dan aykroyd in nothing but trouble with an interesting choice of nose
static.klipy.com
SteveEveLibertineDreⒶm@steveevelibertine.bsky.social · 2h agoI saw that opening weekend with my dad; I think he was expecting boobs lol Instead he got Dan Ackroyd with a penis for a nose 😂
I saw that opening weekend with my dad; I think he was expecting boobs lol Instead he got Dan Ackroyd with a penis for a nose 😂
My interview with John Fetterman: Me: “so, Senator, is fire good?” John Fetterman: “fire BAD!!!”
“Put out that dog rocket!” That was such profoundly weird movie
James Bond producers: “we’re going for something REALLY different this time” Me: “Is it a white British guy?” James Bond Producers: “how’d you know!???”
The Independent@the-independent.com · 7h agoJames Bond producer shares update on 007 casting: ‘It’s got to be really different’
"This child was conceived in a Burger King bathroom."
CNN producer: El-Sayed is projected to win. Quick, get the biggest fucking loser you can find on air
“You ever seen that Clint Eastwood movie where he’s going around getting in fights and chasing a chimpanzee?” “Yes I’ve seen ‘in the line of fire’ but that’s not a very nice thing to say about John malkovich…”
Imagine President Zohran telling CEOs to wait in line like everyone else.
The Wall Street Journal@wsj.com · 16h agoNew York City’s business elites are long accustomed to direct access to City Hall, where even Democratic mayors felt the need to court the city’s wealthiest and most influential corporate leaders. That access is getting shredded by Mayor Zohran Mamdani.
Sorry, everyone. I didn’t realise it was Opposite Day
Politico@politico.com · 10h agoProgressives didn’t get the big election night they wanted
John Fetterman has responded to this news with an official statement reading: “Fee Fi Fo Fum…”
Return of the Cmonmacques@cmonmaque.bsky.social · 13h agoTomorrows news today: The winner in Michigan was the Abdul El Sayed campaign, but it’s important to recognise the loser in Michigan too: Also somehow the Abdul El Sayed campaign.
Tomorrows news today: The winner in Michigan was the Abdul El Sayed campaign, but it’s important to recognise the loser in Michigan too: Also somehow the Abdul El Sayed campaign.
The lady loves her genocides, is what I’m saying
Return of the Cmonmacques@cmonmaque.bsky.social · 5h agoSheryl Sandberg is interesting because she’d say something like “oh you care about Gaza? What did you have to say about the Rohingya?!” And you’d be all “hey, where were YOU when that went down” And she’d be all “uh uh I meant Syria. Sudan. THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER!”
Sheryl Sandberg is interesting because she’d say something like “oh you care about Gaza? What did you have to say about the Rohingya?!” And you’d be all “hey, where were YOU when that went down” And she’d be all “uh uh I meant Syria. Sudan. THIS CONVERSATION IS OVER!”