“is it weird having a girlfriend who’s smaller than some of the dicks you’ve sucked?”
Emmy Cumslutress
@coyotegirl.online
she/it "charismatic weirdo" doll-sized canis latrans co-host of @bimbomentality.bsky.social
bestie wedding weekend roadtrip to wine country cant wait to make "MEET ME IN TEMECULA!" references to everyone at the reception and get completely blank stares because none of them were obsessive deadspin commenters lmao
got my eyebrows threaded and feel like a new woman how does this always work and yet i forget each and every time?
PUBLIC TRANSIT IS BISEXUAL -ANYONE CAN RIDE IT i rest my case
Katie Tightpussy, Editor-In-Chief@katie.bzky.team · 16h agopublic transit is NOT bisexual
you can be whatever the fuck you want
molly@mollyfied.bsky.social · 2d agoyou can be whatever the fuck you want
gonna start using "womandatory" in casual conversation and see if anyone calls me on it
absolutely cooking here with the crop top idea tho holy shit
Josh Gondelman@joshgondelman.bsky.social · 2d agoI came up with some more inane bullshit for everyone to argue about!
*matches with two local dolls on taimi* both are inexplicably named emma lmao
if chicxulub was so cool, why hasn't anyone made chicxulub 2? the oort cloud and orbital mechanics: "lol ok then, bitch, if that's how it's gonna be"
excited/nervous/stressed the fuck out about my old SF roommate's wedding this weekend which'll be the first social situation i've been in with my cis ex (who immediately started dating and eventually married my ex-friend) since we broke up 4 years ago,, i have no choice to serve nuclear-grade cunt💅
me hearing another trans girl's voice: "what an actual angel, a veritable goddess, i simply *must* hear her recite sonnets to me on a warm spring day" me hearing my own voice: "3/10, at best a fruity gay guy, somehow even more nasally than i expected"
if 80% of my given bsky posts in a single day aren't simp-ly replies gassing up my friends then i've failed tbh
everyone loves the bitch at the festival who brought the hand sani in her fanny pack
I need help. Because of legal issues, we are years past due on property taxes. We have most of the money but still need $700 within a month or we will lose the house. Our two jobs barely keep us above water and we aren't gaining. Thank you. $app: junkblader venmo: junkblader PayPal.me/junkblader
I would simply like to live my quiet little life as a trans woman and buy fruit and sing and walk my dog and wave to my neighbors and watch movies and use restrooms without being the subject of a culture “war” where both political parties agree I’m a disgusting freak who doesn’t deserve civil rights
i stg everywhere i'm surrounded by faggots. case in point: just this morning i woke up to brush my teeth, and in the mirror what do i see? some faggot mocking me with a toothbrush in her mouth!!
Puppy got to sit in the cockpit today :))))))) Puppy is very very happy
remember to check your pockets, girls. don’t want to run your girlfriend through the wash.
im bored, might play "kiss me" by sixpence none the richer while walking down the stairway holding the railing and looking all shy after getting all pretty to go out, just to feel something,,
*looking at a pic of the petronas towers* "me and who?"
✨️Angel Facts✨️@angelic.style · 2w agooh, theyre sister cities ? do the ..... do the skyscrapers kiss
thinking again for no reason about Eternal Darkness's sanity meter trick where it pretended to delete all your saved games perhaps the most evil gameplay element ever and i love it to this day lmao
help, my gf just kissed me and then shocked me by spitting on my chest as a power move and i haven't washed it off yet because i was so surprised and i don't want to admit how much i liked it, did i say like?i meant loved it im never taking a shower again why is a woman marking me as hers so hot om-