"...but I think we're doing a much better job than they ever could."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3d agoJD Vance: "If you look at the Iranian ability to disrupt the normal lives of Americans, I think it's quite limited. It's not zero."
Derek Sheen
@dereksheen.bsky.social
Comedian, actor, writer, musician and pretty great in the kitchen. My new solo show "MotherL*ver" is coming soon to a town near you. Check out my albums on Apple Music and Spotify! You can find out all about me here: https://linktr.ee/dereksheen
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3d ago“As much as it was a terrible day, I love going to New York..and I love hearing when the loved ones read the names.” So low rizz even Trump won’t endorse him.
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3d agoJD Vance on the 25th anniversary of 9/11: "I am looking forward to it, because it's such an amazing honor to get to go to New York"
“When this is all over, we’ll see…”. So, no. The answer is no.
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3d agoCOLLINS: The widow of an airman killed in the Iran war says she's having trouble getting benefits that they should have access to because it has not been officially declared a war. Can you personally ensure that the family of Alex Klinner gets all the benefits they deserve? JD: So, what's her name?
But when we do it, it's called "law enforcement".
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 4d agoTrump: "They kill they people when they get out to protest. They shoot them right between the eyes."
Jeffries, from my perspective, is largely full of shit. Does @hakeem-jeffries.bsky.social think we're all fucking stupid? Kushner isn't even a federal employee so why would he meet to talk "affordability" with him and not Bessent, or Nutlick or any of the other stooges who got us into the crisis?
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 6d agoJeffries on meeting with Jared Kushner: "He asked for a meeting. I took it. Nothing more, nothing less. We had conversations largely focused on, from my perspective, the affordability crisis."
I hope the Lorax shows up and pulls his tongue out through his asshole
Rick@rickylongthread.bsky.social · last wk.More than 60 trees have been cut down at the East Potomac Golf Links in Washington, D.C., raising alarms among preservationists ahead of a planned golf course overhaul backed by President Donald Trump.
Are you crippled with economic and existential dread, feeling like the act of staying home is the only form of activism you can muster any energy for? Well, you’re IN LUCK! My new special, UNRELATABLE, is streaming on YT and you don’t have to do ANYthing except be online! youtu.be/Xu_6UAYA-7I?...
Derek Sheen - Unrelatable | Full Comedy Special
YouTube video by Blonde Medicine
youtu.be
At long last, "FBI" finally means Female Body Inspector.
Mediaite@mediaite.com · last wk.FBI Reportedly Loosens Hiring Rules So ‘Prostitution and Bestiality’ Are No Longer ‘Automatic Disqualifiers’
No one’s calling it Lake America. “Lake America” is what you name a summer camp for soft children who say, “Don’t you know who my father is?” after a t-ball stand strikes them out
I offered Ted Cruz 10 million dollars to eat his own shit on livestream. Crickets from Ted Cruz. Why is he afraid of the truth
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 2w agothese guys really hate women
One way you know Dolly Parton lived life the right way: I don’t think anyone’s going to get fired for accurately quoting Dolly Parton today.
both hot ones and the joe rogan podcast take place in the black lodge
Me hosting the next WHCD: “Hegseth’s here. Pete, it’s nice to see you left your closet to be here. I kid. Pete’s with his lovely wife. Weird, I’ve never seen you with a beard before? I kid, I kid. Oh, Pete looks mad. Pete, the angrier you get, the cuter you look.” (Sniper takes me out)
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 2w agoHegseth: "No more trannies, just training"
Hi! In case you didn’t know, my brand new special, UNRELATABLE, is now available on YouTube and free to check out! It’s real fun and a little dark and I hope you decide to take the ride!!
Look, are we the laughing stock of the world? Yes. Are we losing a war we should’ve never started? Yes. Is all our food poison now? Yes. Are all the jobs going away? Yes. But the important thing is a blue-haired college student I made up in my head feels bad about memes.
Oh, NOW I see why the economy is so bad. He thinks the gas is the breaks and the breaks is the gas.
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3w agoTrump: "When our country is strong, interest rates should go down. When our country is weak, frankly they should go up."
YAY!! It was so much talking with the great @jackiekashian.bsky.social about French cooking and food and our mutual love of schmaltz!! Go listen and subscribe!!
Jackie Kashian@jackiekashian.bsky.social · 3w agoTomorrow’s dork forest w @dereksheen.bsky.social is amazing and is about French cooking and he has a new special coming out friday!
Wow, he actually does a pretty good Fetterman.
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3w agoWELKER: Do democratic socialists belong in the Dem Party? JEFFRIES: What I can say is I do not support defunding the police, I do not support open borders, I do not support abolishing the Senate. We're focused on actually solving the problems hard-working American taxpayer want us to solve ...
This fuckin’ guy continues to not get it.
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3w agoWELKER: As Democratic leader in the House, would you vote for or against Medicare for All? JEFFRIES: It's not legislation that I currently am co-sponsoring or that I support, but I support the notion we've got to find a path forward to fix our broken healthcare system