Alley Cats feels like it was written by David Brent.

I love reading @quantick.bsky.social books and this one really put a smile on my face. Looking forward to the next one

Someone just described a piece of political chicanery as Putinesque and now I can't stop thinking about pasta.

OMG. 2 people I absolutely loathe. I can't... I don't know what to... Aargh! Don't. Make. Me. Side. With. O'Leary... I need to lie down, my head hurts. share.google/nCHEQfFjdbeE...

Spat deepens between Elon Musk and Ryanair's O'Leary

Musk and Ryanair boss Michael O'Leary have called each other

share.google

Watching the Simon Cowell doc series on Netflix and noticed his company name Syco. Good name I thought but by rights his name is SImon not SYmon so it should really be... oh, right, fair enough.

Preparing the 2nd episode of Charlie Higson's interview on the Offcuts Drawer podcast, and the transcription app has renamed his 2015 revival of that well-known fantasy drama series starring Vic'n'Bob: RANDOM HOT COAT DECEASED. Which I quite like actually.

Final episode of the podcast is a 2 parter. Charlie Higson has had such a varied and interesting career that there were too many projects to fit into one hour. So this is Part 1. Also featuring the largest cast so far. Enjoy. And please share 🙏offcutsdrawer.com/charlie-higson-1

Fast Show's Charlie Higson: The Projects That Didn't Make It

Fast Show star, James Bond novelist, writer of TV drama, thrillers, sketch comedy & more, shares the writing that didn't make it and what happened next.

offcutsdrawer.com

Lookee here. Purdy river sunset. So purdy I couldn't choose which shot to post so please enjoy all three. #purdy

Fascinating thread. And that's EXACTLY what my podcast The Offcuts Drawer is all about. Will be taking notes - and may have found some guests for the next series... offcutsdrawer.com

The Offcuts Drawer: Top Writers Share Their Best Worst Ideas

Podcast where successful writers share their rejected scripts & unfinished writing. Performed by actors. Hosted by Laura Shavin.

offcutsdrawer.com

John Reppion@johnreppion.bsky.social · 8mo ago

Do you ever think about the projects you got paid to work on, but which never actually came out? I co-wrote an entire original comedy horror TV series pitch / outline / bible for a production company once. I turned someone else's short comic into a script for an animation once. Loads of things.

Hey TV comedy producers! Writer here... with a climate-based sitcom pitch. I spy the below initiative - for a duo of writer + producer. Fancy joining me to apply, to fix the twin issues of CLIMATE and PEOPLE NEED TO LAUGH? My people (me) are (is) ready to take your call (or DM) okre.org/okre-fund/

A brief but important piece of advice that Jonathan Lynn would give his younger self, which applies more than ever today. Hear the whole episode: offcutsdrawer.com/jonathan-lynn

😆😆😆

Lucy Prebble@lucyprebblish.bsky.social · 8mo ago

Not this, but

Seriously guys. T SHIRTS and MUGS too. It's so brilliantly done, such a fantastic idea for a gift, and calendars are fine but don't suit every potential recipient. Plus more £££ for you. I WANT A SET OF THESE MUGS.

christhebarker@christhebarker.bsky.social · 8mo ago

Calendars have arrived and look smashing! If you bought one you should receive it soon. If you missed out and you’d like one, you can get them now at shop.printtrail.com/product/the-... They really would make excellent Christmas presents. (If you happen to live near me you can buy direct from me)

The comedy legend Jonathan Lynn (Yes Minister, On The Buses, Harry Worth - Harry Worth! - and films like My Cousin Vinny) shares the projects that were less successful & talks about his life offcutsdrawer.com/jonathan-lynn His 1st pro acting job was on BROADWAY with Cleese & Chapman pre-Python ffs

Jonathan Lynn: Screenwriter, Film Director, Actor & Novelist

The creator & writer of Yes Minister shares clips of the abandoned projects & rejected screenplays along the way to his Hollywood success & beyond.

offcutsdrawer.com

Having problems making a particular decision? Not got a tossable coin to hand? I made this to help you... voracle.base44.app

Back after a short break. New writing podcast ep out, featuring multi-nom-de-plumed novelist Bernadette Strachan and an acting cast of @emmabclarke.bsky.social Beth Chalmers, Marcus Hutton, Noni Lewis and Shash Hira. offcutsdrawer.com/bernadette-strachan

Bernadette Strachan, Novelist - The 7 Voices of Bernadette

Bernadette, with 28 published novels, shares some of her more outlandish, unexpected writing from projects that never made it... but still led to success.

offcutsdrawer.com

Hmm... this rings a bell... Old Fools podcast with Ian and @quantick.bsky.social - lots of entertaining grumpiness (and mucho swears, be warned) Have a listen why don't you.

Ian Martin@ianmartin.bsky.social · 10mo ago

Paddington Bear, the Face of Palliative Care (and Assisted Dying).

Always.

Google recipes. Find one that looks tasty & has 50+ good reviews. Check ingredients, method & then read reviews: "swapped the salmon for chicken, even better", "lime makes it too sweet, used soy sauce instead" "Replaced tomato with chocolate, makes a tasty dessert".... I mean, what's the point??

See the funny faces! Well, the faces aren't funny but their voices say things that are & this is what the voices look like. There are some very entertaining scripts in this episode by BBC's Ed Reardon. Find out why they went awry and more... Also JUNE WHITFIELD offcutsdrawer.com/christopher-douglas

The Way It Is, 4x series on R4, early 00's. Simon Evans was presenter Richard Richard, I was co-prez Lolly Swain + all other F parts (loads) Dave Lamb (Come Dine With Me) & Chris Pavlo played the rest. Writers on here @simonblackwell.bsky.social @jonholmes.bsky.social @dannyrobins.bsky.social + more

What would you do if the great June Whitfield insisted to you that the Beatles' heyday was during World War II? (No, obvs she's alive in this scenario smartarse) This is what @chdouglas.bsky.social did, very resourceful I thought. Hear the full episode here: offcutsdrawer.com/christopher-douglas

This looks fantastic, and what a great idea for a Xmas prez for the discerning coolhunter d'un certain age. Also I really want these designs available as posters, t-shirts and mugs - make it happen Q 🙏

David Quantick@quantick.bsky.social · 11mo ago

For @ianmartin.bsky.social and the rest of the feisty pensioner sleuths: www.kickstarter.com/projects/dav...

Fan of Crossroads? Old-time British comedy greats? New-time Radio 4 curmudgeon Ed Reardon? This episode is right up your street. Christopher Douglas shares the comedy scripts the BBC turned down (the fools!) and tales of working with June Whitfield and beyond. offcutsdrawer.com/christopher-douglas

The Fabulous Fails of Comedy Writer Christopher Douglas

The writer & voice of BBC Radio 4's Ed Reardon's Week shares the comedy scripts that missed the mark, got rejected by commissioners or still remain unfinished.

offcutsdrawer.com

When you give your cartoonist pal an idea for a cartoon, he draws it beautifully, adds an extra gag, it gets published in Private Eye and he gives you a thankyou credit for it... Now accepting offers for further work as "muse" ❤️👀🤩

I don't just make this stuff up. This is a wee taster of the very real @pierstorday.bsky.social talking about writing for children and for theatre - and in the full ep sharing some lovely and funny stories about all the fails before the success. Ep is right here: offcutsdrawer.com/piers-torday

New podcast ep klaxon! Award-winning children's author & playwright @pierstorday.bsky.social shares the fascinating failures that led to his writing success with clips performed by @joxvox.bsky.social @kennyblyth.bsky.social @helgwyn.bsky.social & David Lane Pusey offcutsdrawer.com/piers-torday

Piers Torday - Children's Novelist & Playwright

Former TV writer Piers Torday shares pieces of his failed writing projects in various genres before becoming an award-winning children's novelist and playwright

offcutsdrawer.com

Podcast thing. Shout out to the cast: Emma Clarke, Beth Chalmers, Chris Pavlo & Helen Goldwyn, with extra kudos to Ms Clarke for reading a poem that would make my stomach knot if it were me, plus it would have to be at gunpoint (no YOU'RE repressed and uptight, SHUT UP) offcutsdrawer.com/adele-parks

I mean, full disclosure, me, but he and everyone else did this for Equity minimum just so it could get made. I bloody love him. www.mixcloud.com/espeee/the-h...

Ian Martin@ianmartin.bsky.social · 11mo ago

Old man, legend, comedy genius, national treasure, certified Top Human Being, speaks his mind. "We couldn't make that movie now..." THAT's the thing you want to write a biting little essay about? Right, let's put MICHAEL FUCKING PALIN in his place. Step outside, breathe the rain-polished air, mate!

The ultimate challenge. Can you watch this short video right til the end without looking away? My stomach's in knots - the finger in the mouth moment - yeeeeesh. Kudos AG, you've caused me actual physical cringe-pain.

Alistair Green@mralistairgreen.bsky.social · 12mo ago

You are exactly where you’re supposed to be right now 💞