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Scum Shit 🔜 Blizzcon

@drivethrupmc.bsky.social

Former Cockroach Pimp, Active Combatant

763 Posts208 Follower219 Folgt
mr. cannoli@boner.ink · 2d ago

we asked bluesky's 38 most influential posters what is their secret to posting so good and they all told us to kill ourselves

Mettic@mettic.bsky.social · 2d ago

do you think if that nexon starcraft thing is real and they announce it at blizzcon next week are people just gonna start lighting shit on fire? like i'll be watching the stream and see people just straight killing each other? i'm gonna see johanna faries get eaten?

Stephen Thompson@idislikestephen.bsky.social · 3d ago

When I worked for The Onion, practically everyone who visited the office would ask how they could submit headlines. This one stoner delivery guy was so persistent, we finally told him he could submit 10 headlines on spec and we'd take a look. First one on his list was "Shit and poop are Stinky!!!"

Jon Bois@jonbois.bsky.social · 3d ago

if i wrote for the onion i'd write a headline that was like "Breaking News: The president is an orange!" and then you'd click it and the article would be like "An orange-haired no-good crook, that is!" that might seem a little mean-spirited but the way i see it, i'd get a click and you'd get a laugh

splendidland🌱@splendid.land · 3d ago

we also had a running joke about a line of low quality and incongruous action figures called Cheapo's. I was probably around 8 when we made this. this is the foundation my sense of humour is built on top of.

Coming soon to a charity shop near you! Only 7p each. Cheapo's, Your one dimensional buddy! Ages 10-10. WARNING - DO NOT EAT! Made in Ivybridge by blind squirrels. Action Figures Guaranteed to fall apart owing to cheap production methods. No. 1: The Cheapo's Sheriff. Also coming soon! No. 2: The Cheapo's Ice cream van. No. 3: The Cheapo's Stones No. 4: The Cheapo's Rabbit Hutch (The rabbits do not fit in the hutch, not to scale!) No. 5: The Cheapo's Grass (One square inch of green fun!) No. 6: The Cheapo's Tea cosy Look out for the Cheapo's comic at car boot sales! Issue one comes with amazing free flies.
Ami - BUY MY BOOK 🏳️‍⚧️📚💙@amithero.bot · 3d ago

hello I am modern aaa game designer. the shareholders told me to make the game longer. I do not wish to make the game longer. they told me to make the game longer or I lose job. I make the player collect 6 potatoes for 5% damage resistance. The shareholders are happy. I've been laid off.

Crushed@silenttakedown.bsky.social · 4d ago

yeah sure whatever, let lara croft cook potato stew on her phone for 2m0s of damage resistance who gives a shit anymore

a screenshot from the upcoming remake of Tomb Raider 1. lara croft is looking at her phone in the middle of an ancient ruin, and it's showing her a generic crafting menu, and a png of saucepan of stew that apparently her phone lets her cook for "Damage resistance" if she has 6 potatoes