I woke up from a dream where I was fighting off Zombies just has I was struggling to stab one in the head and now Im worried that when I go back to sleep its gonna be waiting for me to finish the job

Waiter gave me a free Hat cause I asked if they sold them but they dont 😁

Its so weird being 42, I distinctly remember when I was 9 saying I wasnt ever gonna get older. Why didnt that work?

Damn it. My tea was too hot to drink so I left it for a bit and now its too cold

Hey a lot of folks missed "the Mitchells vs the machines" cause it came out in the covid times without any real advertising, and thats a real shame cause it was a great movie. So if youre reading this thinking, what that? Go watch it.

Monchi Mitchells Vs The Machines

Alt: Monchi Mitchells Vs The Machines

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Beans

My wife just punched me in the arm in her sleep. I said oi what are you doing?! She said sorry ai was punching people in my dream. I said you were punching people in reality too. Shes so violent when shes asleep.

A show about peoples innies and outties but its not severance its just bellybuttons.

Why dont you make like a Jazz musician and skedaddle daddio

Why do people say "how are you today?" First thing in the morning, like I dont know its too early to tell

Im never sure quite how much of the filling youre supposed to spit out in the car after your dentist appointment.. like when does it stop being oh thats just a little bit of loose stuff they didnt hoover up and start being, huh that thing hasnt taken, should prolly go back..

Squig of the day

So anyway, in ET, he dies (no explanation) and comes back to life (also no explaination) but while hes dying, there are doctors attempting to treat and revive him.. what the fuck is going on there? They dont know how to treat this previously unknown being from another planet, surely?

Today Steve wanted to play fallout4

Ok but is Jimothy just a real life Rigby?

Rigby from Regular Show

Alt: Rigby from Regular Show

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The problem with mornings is the time that they happen

Up early for a dentist apointment. Then heading straight out to do some gardening in wimbledon. But did anyone tell my colon? Will I have to poop? And if so where?!

Once youve thrown a coin in the Trevi fountain, insuring that you will one day return to Rome, you cannot die until it has been fufilled. Its the easiest way to gain immortality.

Checking the TickerTape machine for the lastest offerings from BlueSky.com

Today I took some watermelon for the squigs and rats at the graveyard. Didnt get any photos though

Its hot, when its hot we take them hydration.

@iseefacesinthings.bsky.social

Went on a hike with 2 of my cousins today. 22km from Seaford Head, across the Seven Sisters, to Eastbourne.

Today at the park I saw Limpys Daughter, with her was a very young squig with very similar features, does Limpys daughter have a daughter of her own? I can only speculate, but I think yes, most likely.

Watching a video of an American Badger and singing American Badger in the style of Lenny Kravitz

Cute American Badger 'Fat Thor' Resting in Dirt

Alt: American Badger Resting in Dirt

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We’ve all lied or cheated or held a bank manager hostage. It doesn’t make us "bad people"

Me: ok this is pretty delicate work, oh, ok the ants are escaping, need to focus, get this under control, then deal with the ants.. My body: is now a good time to suddenly really need to poop? Me: no! My body: *sucks air in through teeth* ah wish youd let me know sooner I already sent out the order

Gonna go play with my chainsaw. Catch you kids later.

Arnold Schwarzenegger carrying log in Commando

Alt: Arnold Schwarzenegger carrying log in Commando

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You just know one day youll wake up and find youre on a private island being hunted for sport by a billionare, and as soon as you fight back and kill Them and escape Youre the one gonna get in trouble with the police..

by taking no responsability for anything I do, it stands to reason that anything that goes wrong, is someone elses fault