I cannot believe how embarrassing our species is. We’ve got everything we need to make life here incredible for everyone, and instead we’ve let one creepy, sweaty, barely-human wax figurine hoard all the wealth and lazily bash his useless, phallic litter into the moon.

Sunday morning, 11am, I’ll be at Backyard Comedy Club in Bethnal Green talking about that time I went to a bunch of countries to find out how people cope with mortality (way more dancing corpses than you might think). I will be joined by a live band and poet! www.tickettailor.com/events/sunda...

Reserve your spot – This Party’s Dead: A Journey to Seven of the World’s Death Festivals – Backyard Comedy Club

This Party’s Dead: A Journey to Seven of the World’s Death Festivals – Backyard Comedy Club, Sun 3 May 2026 - This week, to mark Dying Matters Awareness Week, we welcome writer and journalist Erica Bu...

tickettailor.com

I won a Creative Climate Action Award for a poem called There Are Still American Flags on the Moon. www.europeana.eu/en/exhibitio...

Europeana@europeana.bsky.social · 4mo ago

Discover the winning stories and poems from the Europeana Creative Climate Action Award 2026! 🌍⭐😍 The Award asked participants for up to 500 words of creative writing, fiction or poetry inspired by one or more of the images in our #ClimateAction gallery. Read the winning entries ➡️ bit.ly/4sLWR7n

The Spanish PM: "The govt of Spain will not applaud those who set the world on fire just because they show up with a bucket" In other news Starmer is in the Middle East today.

may this define her for the rest of her life. she was willing to stoop this low and still got fired. girl, bye.

If you ever feel like you’re generally not good at things, think of this picture: my failed attempt to crack an egg. You’re doing great, sweetie.

Horrified by the antisemitic attack in our city. Antisemitism is vile and has no place here. Solidarity with the Jewish community in Golders Green - and with our communities across the country who will be feeling this today.

"What's your favourite book of the Bible, Robert?" "Tough one. I think I'd have to say The Best of the Bible"

Henry Mance@henrymance.ft.com · 5mo ago

from Fraser Nelson:

🎶 HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU… 🎶 *knock knock* Now who could that be? www.theguardian.com/uk-news/live...

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor arrested on suspicion of misconduct in public office – live

The police raided Andrew’s Norfolk home this morning

theguardian.com

Reform thinks not being allowed to invite themselves to speak at a university is an attack on free speech (it’s not), and they responded by threatening an actual attack on free speech.

Otto English@ottoenglish.bsky.social · 6mo ago

This is pretty menacing. Sarah Pochin wrote to Bangor's university student run debating society requesting that she attend to "answer questions from students." When they said "no" Reform rolled all it's tanks onto the lawns and said they'll cut funding to the entire university if they win.

Trump is mentioned in the files WAY more than Harry is mentioned in all the Harry Potter books. And all of the Harry Potter books have come out.

“Peace isn’t what you ask for when the boot is already on someone’s neck. Peace is what the powerful ask for when they don’t want to be interrupted.”

Greg Olear@gregolear.bsky.social · 6mo ago

One of the best things I’ve read in a while:

“What horseback sport featured at five summer Olympic Games?” “Jousting.” Let’s not chuck the baby out with the bath water here folks, I’m taking that one as a suggestion.

Private Eye Magazine@privateeyenews.bsky.social · 7mo ago

Is the nation dumbing down? These are real answers to real questions on real quiz shows, all from Private Eye's Dumb Britain column. From ‘Private Eye - The Year In Review 2025’. Available to watch in full on the Eye’s YouTube: youtu.be/AQ5Xxj2EwGQ

Yesterday London posed very nicely for me from the window of the OXO Tower.

Can’t stop seeing it.

Trump administration demands lists of Jews “as part of the administration’s stated goal to combat antisemitism on campuses” Phew! Calm down everyone, the administration sending out a Gestapo to abduct people to force them into penal slavery just wants to help www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026...

UPenn faculty condemn Trump administration’s demand for ‘lists of Jews’

Groups say EEOC demand for names and personal details echoes dark history and threatens safety and civil rights

theguardian.com

If you won't bring severe consequences for these relentless crimes against humanity, if you won't even consider it, if you won't even try then what is the point of you? Not just as a politician; as a human being.

Helen Kennedy@helenkennedy.com · 7mo ago

I want these fuckers prosecuted. I will not vote for a candidate who shies away from this.

I watch the bulk of ashleythebaroness videos, despite rarely sharing them. But this one hit today. And she's right! We're not dealing with some foreign ideology. We're dealing with a uniquely American phenomenon. fascism wrapped in our own flag

More appalling news from dystopia central www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2026...

London’s homicide rate drops to lowest in more than a decade

Sadiq Khan says ‘public health’ approach has made the capital one of the safest cities in the western world

theguardian.com

i know we're all busy but i just overheard a plumber say "parlez-vous français ? non ? you motherfuckers don't even speak french, do you" to a pair of french bulldogs

I am so tired of the narration. It’s a pedophile protection ring, kidnapping and murdering their own citizens and trying to start WWIII - we have the info we need, a thousand times over. No more narration needed. DO SOMETHING. AND NARRATE THAT.

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 7mo ago

Walz: "Do you have no decency? We have someone dead in their car for no reason whatsoever. I don't want to be right about this, but I said if they do this they're gonna create a chaotic situation where someone innocent is gonna get killed. And they did it."

We in Britain are proud to emulate the Democrats’ tough line against lawbreaking, corruption and bare-arsed evil: we won’t do anything, or even really suggest anyone should, but so help me god, we will narrate it.

Adam Bienkov@adambienkov.bsky.social · 7mo ago

Starmer's spokesman says the reports of Grok's activity is "disturbing" but doesn't say UK Government will take any action

The lack of courage in the “home of the brave” is desperately embarrassing. They’re being dragged into an openly corrupt illegal war by a murderous pedophile to a Democrat chorus of “oh hey, come on now!”, and the only thing that will ever take him down is his own rancid, failing carcass.

PizzaMonk@pizzatraveler.bsky.social · 7mo ago

If kidnapping a foreign president isn’t enough to get him out of office, why would the Epstein files be a silver bullet?

Well, it’s not as if Trump went THAT beyond the pale. It’s not like he [trigger warning: terrorism] spray-painted a plane.

Jonathan Hopkin@jonathanhopkin.eurosky.social · 7mo ago

Starmer being as Starmer as you can possibly be

"Ho ho ho remember when we thought Bush was as bad as it got hehehe" narrative always ALWAYS ignores the fact: it's because they were as bad as it was allowed to get THEN. That's how bad they could be at that point and they paved the way for it to be the way it is now. Same as in the UK.

Marco Rubio is reportedly saying Maduro will stand trial in US courts. Which means it’s now the US administration’s position that US courts can hold foreign presidents, but not the US president, accountable for crimes.

The FIFA Peace Prize doesn't mean what it used to

If one more person shares this with a joke about Stephen Miller being on the end to hide the fact that he has no reflection, so help me GOD I will laugh again

Corporate wants you to find the difference between this picture and this picture.