BREAKING: Juan Carlos Lopez-Gomez has been released. This is the moment he reunited with his mom.
hayley alexander
@hayleyalex.bsky.social
Skilled yapper. Chronic poster. Avid hobby starter. Don’t ask how much I spent on the Eras Tour. 🪩
Watching my cat roll over on the heating pad just now so he could evenly toast his other side makes me want to cry my eyes out. He’s so perfect and pure and cozy. And he has no idea who the president is, so I know he has the best day every day. 😭
oh, youre here from tik tok? (chuckle's lightly ) Is that like reddit for babies
I was forced to circle back on stuff today :( sorry to all y’all
Tabby and I have been married 54 years today. It's all good.
As someone whose mental health hinges on the availability of Little Treats & Trinkets™, I cannot possibly participate in this no-buy 2025 madness. I need my Swedish candy and special coffees.
Another Dec 31 = another financial goal with a restrictive 12-month plan that I’ll bail on in 3 months. But at least I’ll have a nice new planner!!!
Apparently my fiancé’s fantasy baseball league elected me “League Sweetheart.” I was flattered until I learned 1) I’ve been on the ballot for many years and this is just my first time winning and 2) there’s no crown, no sash — just an expectation I’ll send koozies or something to their draft??
“Hey, do you guys know any music from the new Timothée Chalamet movie?” -Me to the two-man band at a sports bar in Portsmouth, NH.
A Complete Unknown was incredible. I’m so happy. Wow.
The quick shot of Kevin McCallister shoving fireworks into his backpack in 2 really is some Chekhov’s gun shit.
Tomorrow is four years since we lost Beans to brain cancer. We'd be honored in having your support in remembering her with a $24 donation to the Team Beans Infant Brain Tumor Fund. Every dollar directly supports childhood cancer research at Dana-Farber. danafarber.jimmyfund.org/site/TR?fr_i...
Just saw a group of 5 teen goths getting their photo taken with a real bearded Santa. Who said Mall Culture is dead?
Kicking off Christmas with my in-laws by running a quick favorability poll on Luigi
If you’re ever in Mexico City, go to Blanco Colima in Roma Norte and order as much of the menu as you can. ¡Estuvo delicioso!
the feds: stop trying to turn this guy into some cool antihero with a badass public image also the feds: *treat him like they’ve captured the joker*
It’s not perfect, but Facebook is still the best platform on earth for connecting with all of the people my friends briefly dated in 2007
What if we kissed… at the Mexico City Chuck E. Cheese’s?
What do you mean I can get married at Mr. Darcy’s house???
I’m watching an Eras Tour livestream in bed, waiting to take my sleep meds bc I’m on the East Coast and I just want to see it all thru til the end. All this joy over the past 2 years has been really nice and I’m going to miss it.
Took some adderall this afternoon so I could get my act together and knock out some house projects I’ve been putting off. Ended up just knocking myself out for a blissful 2 hr. nap. It’s called staying on brand, folks.
ADHD and Type 1 diabetes is a terrrrrible combination. Terrible. Oh you left your insulin at home? You lost your Dexcom transmitter? You forgot to take insulin with ur little pancake breakfast feast and now your blood sugar is over 350?? 🤡
I need to buy one of the acrylic salad bowls from Olive Garden and they are somehow not for sale to the general public????
me: i have a bunch of anxiety rn brain: how bout a coffee me: idk sounds like a bad idea brain: iced coffee me: ok yeah that makes more sense
Let’s delete “impactful” from the Corporate America lexicon. Pls.
No one on Bluesky will be able to experience my Ambien tweeting bc I quit taking it before I migrated over here. Sad. Those were silly goose times.