Jordan LaFlure
@jdlaflure.bsky.social
Executive Editor @theonion.com Proud employee of an adult-attraction-only workplace.
The Onion presents Birth of a Nation, the only movie ever named this, is now live. www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cTi...
America: Birth Of A Nation
YouTube video by The Onion
youtube.com
America: Birth Of A Nation | Official Trailer The Onion's look back on 250 years of American exceptionalism premieres July 3, just as our Founding Fathers predicted.
To my coworkers: This will be the very last time I make this face in the office. I sincerely apologize and will be taking some time to reflect on the decisions I've made that got me here.
The nation’s unrivaled purveyor of political satire says it will direct a “significant share” of merchandise sales to Sandy Hook families in perpetuity.
Say whatever the fuck how want about kat. But besmirch a $12.99 shrimp plate from the finest fast (casual) food restaurant in the midwest and you’re gonna catch some heat. Believe that.
Person falsely claims to be poor. People get offended for us taking an issue with that.. while admitting that the person is middle class.
Imagine my surprise this morning, firing up infowars.com for my daily dose of brain poison!
Off Air
infowars.com
My statement on the end of the old InfoWars, and the imminent beginning of a much better one.
The Onion’s print ads are the best thing in the newspaper.
clearing shelf space for our first pulitzer
Trump Asks Nicki Minaj To Explain Eating Ass
WASHINGTON—Pulling her aside at a Treasury Department event Wednesday, President Donald Trump reportedly asked hip-hop artist Nicki Minaj to explain eating ass. “Explain it to me, in the simplest term...
theonion.com
if this was the audio I heard when watching live on tv I’d have cried harder than I did
As called by Don Fischer (who called IU's basketball game in Bloomington earlier today) on Indiana radio:
Print edition of the @theonion.com is worth it for the ads alone. And last December, they included extra sheets with gift wrap. And there was also the full-sheet "sickos" panel insert.
Folks! Today is the last day to take advantage of The Onion's Black Friday sale. For $75, you get a year of newspapers shipped monthly to your actual house. First one arrives by Christmas, and the middle of the December issue is wrapping paper. Sign up! It's good! membership.theonion.com
Hi everybody, It's Black Friday, a big day for us at The Onion, since we rely almost entirely on your memberships. Our goal for 2026? More print subscribers than the Washington Post. This is, somehow, feasible. So sign up! A year of print is $75 for the year today. Help us do a very funny thing.
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Disappointed in the Albert Brooks heads on this site ignoring how obvious this is.
Somebody owes us an explanation for why this isn’t called ‘Defending Your Wife’ youtu.be/irXTps1REHU?...
Somebody owes us an explanation for why this isn’t called ‘Defending Your Wife’ youtu.be/irXTps1REHU?...
Eternity | Official Trailer HD | A24
YouTube video by A24
youtu.be
Look, I’ve unsubscribed and resubscribe to the NYT a dozen times in the last few years. I, too, have been a target of the “ if you had any ethics you would quit” ire when I worked at Deadspin. But journalism jobs are few and far between these days, and there are very few “good” media owners.
You're not very principled if you're working for the NYT at this point. Or at least, it's the wrong damn principles.
A very big Onion announcement: The Onion has spent the last two months working on a masterpiece. It's a documentary titled Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile. It's so good, in fact, we were set to release it in theatres nationwide on October 2nd. Then two weeks ago, Charlie Kirk was shot.
The Onion News Network truck is currently stationed outside the Broadview ICE Detention facility just outside of Chicago.
I have sent a copy of ‘The Onion’ to every member of Congress. To spread its message to less powerful people, I have also taken out an ad in a lesser newspaper. Read my full letter here: theonion.com/why-im-sendi...
EXCLUSIVE — The Onion has a full-page ad in today’s NYT featuring part of an editorial calling out congressional fecklessness towards Trump. They also sent a copy of their latest issue to every lawmaker. My report, with an excerpt from the full editorial: www.thehandbasket.co/p/exclusive-...
If I told you how long I've dreamed of an animated newswire on theonion.com, you'd probably believe me but we'd both be embarrassed to have discussed it.
Incredible to hear. I’ll say it’s less surprising to someone intimately aware of all the previous constraints but still very validating. Long live The Onion.
It isn't a surprise to me that returning to print has made the Onion significantly funnier, but it is a surprise to me how *quickly* it has done so.
The Onion subscriber newsletter was nominated for a Webby Award today. The thing you get OTHER than the paper is up for an award. Yes, I will eat the Webby if we win. Stop asking. I like how they taste. It is not unusual. It's regular behavior. vote.webbyawards.com/PublicVoting...
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I just voted in The Webby People's Voice Awards and checked my voter registration.
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Long live The Onion.
GREAT news everyone! The Onion is hiring! For a bunch of new positions. Sports Editor (yes, we're bringing it back): jobs.gusto.com/postings/the... Entertainment Editor (going harder here too): jobs.gusto.com/postings/the... And a Staff Writer (!): jobs.gusto.com/postings/the... Apply or die!