st Peter don't you call me cause I can't go... suspiciously green bananas from the government store...
onion person@junlper.beer · yesterdaysuspiciously green bananas is sadly one of the funniest things i’ve read in awhile
my chemical castration
@kateastrophe.bsky.social
23, she/it an iron-willed fuck up singer/guitarist in dog surgery
onion person@junlper.beer · yesterdayamazed at the idea that saying "no I simply don't want to have sex with you" never occured to the guy in back to the future. he was about to fuck his own mum out of politeness.
francis fukuyama will have her revenge on seattle
if you haven't read this yet please take a bit and do, it's incredible
Stupid Twink@stupidtwink.bsky.social · last yr.hi my name is sam and this is my petition to STOP HURTING MEG IN FAMIL Y GUY!!! 1/64 :) keep readingt!!
you have to stay alive bc if u kill urself now u might miss the magical night you share with your friends singing shitty karaoke together where midway through an off-key rendition of "Total Eclipse of the Heart" you realize the years of suffering you endure can never extinguish the beauty of living
WE USED TO HAVE STEVE JOBS. JOHNNY CASH. BOB HOPE. NOW WE HAVE NO JOBS, NO CASH, AND NO HOPE. I HOPE GEORGE W BUSH DOESN'T DIE
bus driver who stopped and let me on when he saw me fucking Sprinting after him you will be reincarnated as a lotus flower
CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES THIS IS WII SPORTS RESORT
freaky Mr Bright side: out of my cage and I'm cumming just fine
*la dispute voice* i think i saw you in my sleep. oomfie.
depressed buddhist: suicide is a temporary solution to a permanent problem
dude singing celebrity skin. Man Hole Covers
the good friday agreement has caused the previously hard border to wither away. to become soft. and pathetic. barely noticeable. and. good heavens,
dude blasting a horrible techno edit of disturbeds cover of sound of silence on the train public transport staff should be issued mortars
when one of my more popular mutuals retweets my stuff I feel like I've secured venture capital
