Mallory Langston
@primnimproper.bsky.social
Sorta-sabbitical-ing lawyer mom, former indigent parent counsel, plush robe and blanket enthusiast, Roger the alien fangirl, casually profane, bakes and builds shit.
This is the same energy as the flight attendant who deployed the emergency slide (on the ground), grabbed two beers, and jumped. Kings among men.
Pixie Casey@pixiecasey.bsky.social · yesterdayin insane local news, the 26 year old director of a rocky horror production was arrested for sending threatening messages to himself in order to get the play shut down bc he didn’t want to deal with cast drama www.mynbc5.com/article/rock...
I don't know who needs to hear this today, but they couldn't just fly on the eagles to Mordor because THERE'S NOTHING INCONSPICUOUS ABOUT A GIANT BIRD IN THE SKY. You know who'd see that coming from miiiiiiiiiiiles away??? THE GIANT EVIL EYEBALL IN THE SKY.
I've been binge-watching documentaries for a couple of weeks, and I really think that, at my core, I am just a nosey little shit who longs to know things. I mean--er, ummm--I'm a "lifelong learner."
God, if this ain’t the entire truth. Standardised tests measure one (1) thing, and that’s how good you are at playing the standardised test game. and once you realise that solving a Rubik’s cube is just a party trick, if you see someone bragging about it like it makes them better… it’s gross
Chris Riedel@medievalhistory.bsky.social · 3w agoSome of us are very good at figuring out how standardized tests work. Most of the time, we get grouped together. That's when some of us realize 1) it's just a neat trick, and 2) avoid the ones who don't have that realization.
When people ask whether I have travel plans for the summer, they don't realize that this is maybe the fifth or sixth cutest thing I've seen today. By bedtime, it won't even rank in the top 20 for the day. There's nothing out there for me.
"That dog needs a job." You think keeping the ears of 6 cats perfectly clean is easy??? That's 12 ears! Louise is *always* working! Sheesh.
Mitch McConnell called me today, but I have my iPhone set to send anyone not in my contacts straight to voicemail. He left me a lengthy message about an opportunity to settle my tax debt before the IRS takes me to jail. He tried from several numbers today alone. He's very alive. Very.
Is it just me (a 41 year-old millennial), or does the communism scare tactic only work on a very specific sect of Boomers and older? I have known people my age who oppose socialist policies, but I can't recall a single person who genuinely fears communist world domination. It's a punchline, at most.
Eric Cartman & Butters: We Are Not Letting Them Take Over Our Country
ALT: Eric Cartman & Butters: We Are Not Letting Them Take Over Our Country
static.klipy.com
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · last mo.Trump starts randomly ranting about "communists" and says, "we don't want communists in our country"
Racist piece of shit 1: "It's gonna be hot. Should we reconsider the dark -colored long sleeve shirts?" Racist piece of shit 2: (Something racist/homophobic/misogynistic about 1's "fear" of the sun.) The sun:
Daenerys Targaryen Commands 'Dracarys'
ALT: Daenerys Targaryen Commands 'Dracarys'
static.klipy.com
Ashley Murray@ashleymurray.bsky.social · last mo.Dozens of Patriot Front members just boarded metro minutes ago at the Eastern Market station in Washington, D.C. I asked one National Guard member who they were and they responded "protesters." A July 4th community parade is about to begin just outside the Eastern Market station.
As an ex-vangelical, currently raising a child without religious indoctrination, I can tell you this shit doesn't work in a vacuum. When the grownups in your life aren't threatening eternal damnation if you don't believe it, it reads as batshit bonkers on its face. Enjoy the lawsuits, TX.
Phil Lewis@phillewis.bsky.social · last mo.Starting in 2030, all public school students in Texas will be required to read passages from the Bible in class
Y'all probably need to see this video of Louise having a dream so good it made her tail wag.
going to laugh forever about the Knicks only losing the Trump Game immaculate scriptwriting, no notes
I have a theory that someone programmed a keyboard shortcut on all of DJT's devices that replaces a certain six-letter word with "low IQ individual."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 2mo agoTrump: “Stephen A. Smith is an arrogant fool, a low IQ individual. In other words, he’s ‘dumb as a rock,’ and totally unqualified to ever think of running for high political office, or even low political office, for that matter!”
I'm seeing lots of talk about the Hacks finale from people who looooved it. I sure wish I had. I have loved this show from the beginning. I love Jean Smart so much. I have thought SO MANY TIMES, "I wish my mom could have seen this show. She would have loved it." My mom died at 64.
Being an American during the 250th Aniversary of the United States feels a lot like if the terrorists in Die Hard demanded that the hostages continue having their Christmas party.
Let's imagine it's 10 years ago. An attorney is drafting a pleading. He finds no case law to support his argument, so he gets creative. He makes it up. Files it. Opposing counsel goes to research her response and discovers the case is fiction. How many of these does he get before he's disbarred?
Reuters Legal@legal.reuters.com · 2mo agoA former law firm partner who was sanctioned by an Alabama federal judge last year over artificial intelligence-generated errors in court filings has been reprimanded again by the Oklahoma Supreme Court, marking the fourth time he has faced formal consequences over the same incident reut.rs/430WVFW
My brain has been loud as fuck today. I don't know how to convey to quiet-mind people what it's like to have your own brain blast Bastille's Pompeii at full thinking volume without stopping. It's also not technically playing the memory of the sound recording. It's my voice mocking the recording.
The AI they're trying to shove down our throats is the modern day technological equivalent of the residential trash compactor of the late 80s/early 90s. No one fucking needs it. A human can do it better. We had a trash compactor in our kitchen in the 90s. Stupidest fucking invention of all time.
because I know y’all can’t click and read
Trish Greenhalgh@trishgreenhalgh.bsky.social · 2mo agoEvery summer I repost this article on how to spot drowning. Please read it and pass on. In the last few years I’ve had SIX messages from people who saved a kid’s life after clicking on the link from my feed. slate.com/technology/2...
Neighbor text this afternoon: "I'm so sorry about your car! Let me know if you need anything." I was blissfully unaware of this mess out front. The upside is that I almost dropped this baby down to only liability coverage recently, but got distracted. Rare ADHD win.
Yesterday, charges were dismissed for myself and five others protesting ICE. Yes, it was a win. But it’s not justice. And it’s not over yet.
Two feet of snow in February in Arkansas. I had recently moved back to my mom's house in Springdale, to establish residency ahead of my enrollment at the University of Arkansas School of Law. I was coming off a string of heartbreaking years, and I needed a win. Badly. ...
Written by Uju ✍🏽@writtenbyuju.bsky.social · 3mo agoWhat happened to you that changed the entire trajectory of your life?
A, E, I, O, U, and sometimes Y. Sometimes.
madeline odent@oldenoughtosay.com · 3mo agowhat are the Six Genders? wrong answers only
