Shihab S Joi
@shihabsjoi.bsky.social
Born in Bangladesh, Bred in Britain, Blissful in Barcelona. A-litter-Asian x https://substack.com/@shihabsjoi
One way of looking at this is Iran is laughing because they threw cheap rockets that were intercepted by expensive US ones the other way is to feel horrified that we don’t know just how many innocent Iranians got killed by the ones US threw their way. How many did they fire to have almost run out?!
4am, idrunk as a cunt, and thanks to @jefftiedrich.bsky.social just saw trump talk to his maga cunts and trump does this thing where he talks batshit bollocks but smirks and they all laugh If the canned laughter from the big bang theory became sentient and took ketamine, they'd be at a trump rally😑
4am haiku: I made you give birth Even though you did not want ICE cage them away
She's not wrong. The British WERE the most evil in history (well, maybe bar the mongols), but you ARE (mostly 😅) bloody lovely now x
I'm in trouble on the internet... again...
And this one is quite dark.
jameelajamil.substack.com
How many million dollars does it take to fuck up a trump contract? (punchlines welcome, but "shitloads... and none of it goes to getting the actual job done" will do)
I design and layout reports for global health and you will not believe the to and fro that goes on whenever a map is involved in a graphic (borders are extremely delicate matters)... that the US government screwed up every single African country this at a global health conference boggles the mind!
Dictators assess their domain through the tinted window of their sedan. There’s a definite correlation between them wanting to see gold statues and not wanting to see undesirables line the streets… they then go into their gold offices and sign off more gold statues and kill off more homeless
I respect boycotts but can’t stand selective performative hypocrisy Got lecture that a gig I’m arranging has a dodgy sponsor. Fine, except the holier-than-thou is preaching to me on WhatsApp, owned by fucking Zuckerberg, from an iPhone! It’s like a vegan scolding you while eating a doner kebab 🤨
Friend: Can you cook cuban dishes? Me: Um... no Friend: Oh, I wanted to impress my mother-in-law. She's Cuban. You know I can't cook, oh well, I guess I'll knock something up in the thermomix Me:
Bangladeshi here. My uncles fought with the mukti bahini in the independence war. I have nothing but love for my Pakistani and Indian friends but try that pointing at a map and saying "show me bangladesh in this map of bharat" and I'll serve you your arse on an mustard oiled plate
Social media types often say to me "as a Muslim where is your outrage over this event" For what it's worth, I'm outraged and desperately sad about this event No buts 😥 Solidarity to all LGBTIQA+ friends x
Darlington Green Party@darlingtongreens.bsky.social · last wk.A short statement following events in Berlin.
I am just a dreamer and you are just a dream (Neil Young)
Secret Drug Addict@scrtdrugaddict.bsky.social · 2w ago
People who cook. When someone comments "wow, did you make that from scratch?" what are you meant to say? Um, I didn't make the onions but I bought them and chopped them myself... did the same with the garlic, ginger, veg and meat. I didn't make the spices either. Does that count as from scratch? 🤷
Trump to Iran: so hey, where do you get those cheap missiles you throw at our bases that we have to intercept using really expensive ones? I've asked Russia and China and they won't give me a discount, can I buy some off you guys? I give good price
I'm still upset about the comment I got after sharing my method for slow-cooked pork ribs in a food thread on mumsnet 20 years ago. "not all of us can afford to keep our oven on for eight hours you rich, selfish prick 😡" 😕
I know houmous is sacrosanct in the vegetarian world and meat-eaters have no business messing with it, but I had some leftover slow-cooked lamb and thought, I wonder what would happen if I home-made a houmous only with lamb? I'm afraid it was bloody delicious!
Anyone feeling stressed? Watch this till the end and you'll feel the absolute joy and satisfaction that comes with sticking with something and seeing it through x
Why I love Barcelona pt 843 After the gig last night couldn't get cab, got lost on the walk and took a random turn to find a street party. Went round the corner looking for a place to pee, and just found another street party... 🎈❤️
As New Model Army put it so eloquently exactly 40 years ago: "Our star-spangled Union Jack flutters so proud Over the dancing heads of the merry patriotic crowd Tip your hat to the Yankee conqueror We've got no reds under the bed with guns under our pillows"
NEW MODEL ARMY - 51St State - 1986
YouTube video by supermaxisingles
youtube.com
AgentJoeMcJoe 🇺🇸@joemcjoe11.bsky.social · 2w agoTrumpy is the problem. He'll steal from all of us. Even his own supporters.
So I won't get into the politics of it all but I will say for those who remember that classic 80s Pepe Jeans ad, there's been an el nino heatwave in Barcelona for months and literally the moment he played this the rain came thundering down and it was fucking glorious x
Shihab S Joi @shihabsjoi.bsky.social · 3mo agoWhen your wife remembers you were a massive Morrissey fan when you met 15 years ago but hasn't updated her Husband Music Politics app...😬
My favourite throwaway line from the CNN report: “See those beautiful chandeliers? I can tell you everything about them,” he threatened.
No. The British people want you to explain your £5m bung. The British people want you to stop whinging. The British people want you to stop claiming you speak for them. The British people want you to fuck off and die.
Cry havoc and let slip the gates of war! Sounds less a war cry and more a call to the repairman to fix the fencing
Proof, were it needed, that no amount of money can stop an awkward incel wankbag from coming across as anything but an awkward incel wankbag
My commie WhatsApp group is shit. All I get is memes about ways to replace capitalism with collective ownership to eliminate economic inequality, poverty, and the exploitation of workers, no invites to hey who's up for some buckwheat rye and vodka then we go blow up mount rushmore 😑
Show a photo that makes you smile (getting all my friends I've held onto for 35 years under the same pub) x
TerryLeopard@terryleopard.bsky.social · 2w agoShow a photo that makes you smile
I heard Johnny Cash's version of Mercy Seat before I heard Nick Cave's original, and it stands as the most brazen repeated chorus in a song I know Here's a #MusicChallenge to you, because Cave sings that chorus (I lost count) at least 23 times over and over again. Can you think of a better example?
The Mercy Seat
YouTube video by Nick Cave - Topic
youtu.be
