I PASSED MY SWALLOW STUDY! Turns out this was the big one, too, not just 1 of 2 - so now they'll take 10 days for observation while I transition to food, and then we'll schedule surgery to take this feeding tube out. ^_^ *ecstatic noises* And last night? Unbroken sleep! Finally!

Today's the 1st anniversary of surviving the stroke that nearly killed me. I'm still in rehab, still relearning how to walk, but I'm doing a lot better and close to getting out. Details on what happened and the future of Criminal Intentions now in my FAQ: blackmagicblues.com/faq/

FAQ

Welcome to the longest FAQ on the planet. Now with a soupçon of snark. Edit: I’ve added the info about my stroke, and then the regular FAQ resumes after that. CW below for vomit, near-death, …

blackmagicblues.com

I JUST WALKED Five fucking months and I was finally able to shuffle across a room under my own power, albeit with a walker (I'm sorry I haven't answered comments or finished posting what happened with the stroke--cross-posting to socials still takes a lot out of me.)

Okay. Okay. Okay. I should try to explain what happened, why I'm in the hospital, and why I'm so mad without getting myself any angrier. Anger is why I had one stroke. I don't need another. .... Yeah, I fucking got Fettermaned. Brain bleed blowout. Back of my skull removed. 1/?

I am so fucking tired of nearly dying every other day and no I will *not* be some smiling positive inspo martyr about it, I am angry and I can't walk and I WANT OUT OF THIS HOSPITAL BED

(hi, not dead, not okay but I will be, problem with access to my anti-inflammatories that keep me functional but is getting sorted + dead laptop, do not have the spoons for anything else and sorry if anyone thought I was ignoring them, my tank is on zero--back when I can be)

it has not even been a MONTH since "Freydis Moon is actually Brooklyn Ray brownfishing FOR THE SECOND TIME," can we not get a MINUTE of daylight between that and "James Somerton faked his own suicide then posted balls and hole on his alt the same day"

I was going to say every time I try to move my body gets all "fuck you, I'm a dragon" but honestly that would be worth the pain if I were currently transmuting into a dragon vs. what I actually am: a sack of angry bones that don't want to work properly anymore

god, why do heating pads feel so amazingly good

I saw a post on FB that said "Queer kids need stories about happy queer adults." Yes, absolutely. But they also need stories of angry queer adults whose rage and disdain for the world as it is fuel them to tear apart systems of oppression, even if they never get to become one of the happy ones.

oh my god I am losing my everloving shite mab got her squeaky stuffed little bitty skunk toy stuck to her paw by one claw and she's trying to shake it off squeak squeak SQUEAK and I need to grab my phone and video but I'm laughing so hard and I don't want y'all to hear me wheezing until *I* squeak

why do I keep giving M. Night Shyamalan any trust any trust at all

Do he got a booty? Yes, he doooooo.

I am agog at waking up to being at $625/$735! Only $110 left to go to keep me housed! *8* days left! Please help keep me from becoming homeless. Thank you, you beautiful people. 💙💙💙 #MutualAid #Helpsky paypal.me/rookkilljoy CA/VM: foxrook gofund.me/a6b0a356

Help marginalized gigworker survive, organized by Brandi Michelle Burnett

Hi everyone! I wanted to make a proper update to explain that I am moving … Brandi Michelle Burnett needs your support for Help marginalized gigworker survive

gofund.me

Rook Killjoy (dirtyhands the ninth)@foxrook.bsky.social · 2y ago

I am sick with anxiety - I don't have a hope to get this in 9 days. On my knees begging at this point. Currently sitting at $125/$735. $610 left to go to keep me housed. *9* days left. Please help keep me from becoming homeless. Thank you! #MutualAid #Helpsky paypal.me/rookkilljoy CA/VM: foxrook

SALE! SALE! SALE! For the rest of #IndieApril, grab the ebook copy of my latest story collection for only $.99!!! Generous selection of fairy tale, folklore, and ghost-inspired fantasy and horror stories all with an original illustration by me! #art #book #horror #sff books2read.com/ABrokenThing

Me: I need to get up, but it hurts too much to move. Friend: Pretend the zombies are coming and if you don't get up, they'll eat you. Me: I'm up. Friend: Wow, that worked? Me: No, but it made me smile through the suckage.

ow.

Me: *thinking about a nap before work because fatigue* My Brain: or My Brain: what if My Brain: we concocted a dissertation on how Black Box could have been an amazing, emotional slow build Black-led horror-drama but it fucked itself with amateur-level cinematography and editing + bad tech knowledge

I think about this a lot. If I was "good at people" I wouldn't have been locked in a room for 100,000 words with only a dog for a year. Trying to be a people person online without knowing much of anything about socializing was such a bad fit. I have many regrets. Heh.

Hillary Monahan@hillarymonahan.bsky.social · 2y ago

No one told me social media was a skill. And I just sucked at it. I've evolved, become a less reactionary person. I try to learn, but. I was and am not a natural. 😆

Fuck a buncha Impostor Syndrome. It exists solely as a tool of oppression, of marginalization. It’s designed to make us doubt our worth & gifts, to Other us, to distract us so we don’t rightfully question: what are these spaces? how do they harm? why am I supposed to want them? who keeps the gates?

when militarized police are arresting peaceful protesters that's one of The Signs

You are fantastic. You are an unexpected pizza. You are a series finale that doesn't disappoint. You are a fierce goddess in a jagged wood. You are a seed germinating in wildfire. You are a parade of a thousand Pikachus.

Mad Scientist building a Protocol Droid to transfer my consciousness into for eternal life

david van duzer@dvd.tennica.net · 2y ago

my 5-character theory of all possible stories: Thembo Rogue BearDog Biped Protocol Droid Mad Scientist Main Character Syndrome

A story I wrote in 2015. Around 1900 words. Not much happens. www.patreon.com/posts/102945...

STORY: THE WORKING WORLD | Jayaprakash Satyamurthy

Get more from Jayaprakash Satyamurthy on Patreon

patreon.com

Darlings, write that book. Ignore the 'not selling' rhetoric. Write the book. Write your fix-up novels or your trashy book or your serious historical epic or your barely-disguised autobiography or your pew-pew SF. The people who love books depend on you. Do not fail them.