Bipolar Boy Detective
@wittiestmanalive.bsky.social
Meaningful insights from an absurd, petty human being. The Internet's preeminent anti-horse activist. He/Him.
imagine arriving at the Pearly Gates and St. Peter is like "hol up I still got another 1h20 on this Nostalgia Chick video about your worth as a human being"
𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚝𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚒𝚜 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝. Media 🎥@yourtownisnext.com · last wk.Is there an ethical way to get the answer without paying money to The MLM For YouTubers to sit through 2 hours of Ellis doing that exasperated millennial wine mom shtick?
Me: [explaining Inverted Roller Coasters to an American] so imagine flying with a gun
The Greatest Hits a lot of normies didn’t realize was a greatest hits
Otto English@ottoenglish.bsky.social · last wk.What's the greatest "greatest hits" album ever?
A girl I was dating insisted that we put on her DVD of GOD, THE DEVIL AND BOB (2000), and I don’t remember anything about it except a feeling of absolute certainty that at that same time, someone at Guantanamo Bay was also being forced to watch this
Sitcom People@sitcompeople.bsky.social · last wk.What’s the worst sitcom you will admit to have watched?
true story: one of the Diarrhea Forever supporters screamed at Cute Puppy so hard he gave himself a near fatal heart attack
jaspermaxxing@hoovybaby.bsky.social · last wk.
This shit is why you can't separate continuing to financially support the Harry Potter IP (whether by buying the games, merch, watching the new TV show when its out) from the consequences of what JK Rowling does with that money She's become so stiflingly powerful that even private docs arent safe
Alejandra Caraballo@esqueer.net · last wk.I've never seen such an effort to censor a document as I have the Amnesty International report on gender critical groups because of JK Rowling. They removed the report from the Wayback Machine and now I got a DMCA strike on my Google Drive for having it. It was deleted and removed from my account.
what a shame, the world is being denied Ross Barkan's book about the Mamdani campaign the only way to experience it now is to reread Hell Gate and Jacobin's 2025 election coverage and imagine them written 10 times shittier
The Washington Post@washingtonpost.com · 2w agoPenguin Random House has suspended promotion and public sales of a forthcoming book by journalist Ross Barkan following allegations of extensive plagiarism in political columns he wrote as a freelancer for New York Magazine.
POV: your child is about to die from a combination of measles, polio, tuberculosis, cyclosporiasis and peptide-induced anaphylaxis
Staten Island’s own Scott LoTestosteroni, even when suffering the direct consequences of his weirdo ragemonster behavior, will never learn his lesson. Guy legit gave himself a heart attack. So why is he flipping us off? We’re not the ones who shot him full of gear and HRT for the last decade!
Ron Filipkowski@ronfilipkowski.bsky.social · 3w agoThe quintessential MAGA story in 4 parts.
why would anyone unfollow me i’m such a nice boy
hey real quick gonna just break out the airhorns and sirens to remind all the Internet-poisoned west wing liberals 📢🚨 GIVING MONEY TO 🚨📢 🚨📢 REPUBLICAN GRIFTS 📢🚨 📢🚨 WILL NOT “TOTALLY 🚨📢 🚨📢 EMBARRASS THEM” 📢🚨
The Independent@the-independent.com · 3w agoMarjorie Taylor Greene joins Cameo to offer $149 personalized videos - but she can’t stop talking about Trump
tfw her only job is to actually let a person of color talk
Notorious VOG@notoriousvog.b87fm.com · 4w agoJim Clyburn traveling to Michigan to burn his legacy for corporate moderate Haley Stevens is sad. All that prestige goes straight down the drain when Stevens loses the primary to Abdul El-Sayed. An out-of-touch, elite betrayal of the very base he built that saved Biden. Reject the establishment.🤦🏾♂️
I sure would hate if my taxes went toward good things A truly responsible society only supports funding endless war and human suffering. Should any knowledge of these atrocities intrude on ones blissful ignorance, good citizens must shrug and say, “Whaddaya gonna do? Good things aren’t possible.”
USA TODAY Opinion@usatodayopinion.usatoday.com · 4w agoOpinion: Mamdani's idea may sound appealing, but it's NYC taxpayers who will take the hit, subsidizing discounts they may never even use.
should Blussky add poll features? Repost for Yes! Like for No!
Spooky Sara (summer madness)@pashion.bsky.social · last mo.We REALLY need polls on bluesky. Intensely so.
Attention professional critics: the entirety of my next paycheck is yours, if your published review of the new Ryan Murphy series consists solely of the sentence “More like THE SHARTS.”
"The Cubemother is back." "Bringing vengeance?"
lanyardigan@lanyardigan.bsky.social · last mo.It’s normal when filling the ice trays to whisper, “Cubemother’s back“
My idols are all dead, my enemies are in power, and my coworkers write all their emails with AI
We can do this without perpetuating hagiography for Blockbuster, one of the primary guilty parties for destroying the video rental industry. Especially in DC Metro. Remember your history—if you want to rekindle video store nostalgia, make it a Little Free Erol’s.
Erols Video 80s Video Store
ALT: Erols Video 80s Video Store
static.klipy.com
Joey Politano🏳️🌈@josephpolitano.bsky.social · last mo.Someone in DC set up a “little free blockbuster” with DVDs inside instead of books lol
Quick heads up: none of you motherfuckers better pull this on me after I die. Y’all wouldn’t even retweet my shit when I was alive. When you get got for posting, you’re on your own.
✨queer commie terrorist✨@britculpsapp.bsky.social · last mo.lmfao c’mon man
Overheard from the crowd exiting AMC Lincoln Square: “The Cyclops? That was TOTALLY from Percy Jackson.”
