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Zach Halper

@zanath.bsky.social

PR by day, Star Wars, politics, baseball by night.

5420 Posts708 Follower71 Folgt
Ty Dunitz@glitchritual.com · 5h ago

When he dies, don't let anyone hit you with some tired 'respect the dead' bullshit. We're gonna fireworks-over-Coruscant, Ewoks-playing-stormtrooper-helmets this shit until the wheels fall off

Zach Halper@zanath.bsky.social · 8h ago

Watched the first episode of The Ninth Jedi during my lunch break. I’m so impressed. So far, an excellent continuation of the amazing shorts BUT also a story you can jump right into if you hadn’t seen the others. Can’t wait to watch the rest.

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 9h ago

El-Sayed: "Mike, I'm gonna say it right now, I know you're gonna say no because you're a coward: Five debates, alright? ... By the time we're done, you are not gonna have safe quarter from people holding you accountable to what you've done for them here in Michigan. We will send you back to Florida"

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 21h ago

Trump on Venezuela: "They had the tragedy the other day with the problem, as you know. That was a terrible problem. The uhhh, earthquake I guess you would call it." (The quake was in June)

Lisa Needham@snipy.bsky.social · yesterday

honestly can't stress enough, as a former family law attorney, how depressingly common Max Miller's behavior and words are, right down to the petty fixation on custody procedure and rules when faced with allegations of shocking violence.

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · yesterday

Rep. Max Miller: "When I was reported for child abuse of my daughter for a broken collarbone, my daughter was in my ex-wife's care 9 out of the last 11 days and she took her to the emergency room, which is a contempt violation from our shared parenting plan."

Andrew Smith@azsmith.bsky.social · yesterday

The reason animals in the wild don’t wipe their asses (besides not having opposable thumbs) is that they their anuses aren’t lodged deep between two buttocks against which things can smear. When you walk your dog, look at its ass. The shit falls right out without touching anything. Basic anatomy.

Ben Collins@bencollins.bsky.social · yesterday

Oh my god the dietician who is telling everyone in the White House to only eat steak and sauerkraut doesn't wipe his ass.

To O’Mara, the diet is not just a temporary means of losing weight but a way to eat for good. He has been doing it for 10 years, and credits it with turning his life around. At one point in our conversation he pulled up the Bristol Stool Chart, which ranges from Type 1 (“separate, hard pellets”) to Type 7 (“watery, no solid pieces”). O’Mara is consistently delivering Type 4 (“smooth, soft, like a snake”), with pointed ends, indicative of healthy rectal function, he told me. “When you start eating healthy, you don’t need toilet paper,” he claimed. “Animals in the wild have no residual stool on their anus.” He described a proper bowel movement to me this way: odorless, wipe-free, over in three to seven seconds and “nearly orgasmic.” “I could have a bowel movement behind a sheet at a dinner party in the corner of the room,” he said, “and nobody would know.”
Zach Halper@zanath.bsky.social · yesterday

I’m used to cowardice by Republicans in Congress but Cornyn’s weak justifications for confirming Blanche are on another level. So much for all of that big talk after Trump fucked him over.

Zach Halper@zanath.bsky.social · 2d ago

I hope #Yankees fans give George Lombard Jr. some grace as he adjusts to the big leagues. He’s had initial growing pains offensively at every new level before settling in. I don’t want to hear any boos after his first strikeout.