The reason animals in the wild don’t wipe their asses (besides not having opposable thumbs) is that they their anuses aren’t lodged deep between two buttocks against which things can smear. When you walk your dog, look at its ass. The shit falls right out without touching anything. Basic anatomy.

Ben Collins@bencollins.bsky.social · yesterday

Oh my god the dietician who is telling everyone in the White House to only eat steak and sauerkraut doesn't wipe his ass.

i’m never gonna be able to fire a cruise missile yet the question of using my tax dollars for them has never been up for debate

USA TODAY Opinion@usatodayopinion.usatoday.com · 3d ago

Opinion: Mamdani's idea may sound appealing, but it's NYC taxpayers who will take the hit, subsidizing discounts they may never even use.

Also the Republicans were screaming that Fauci helped authorize vaccines for children, which is something every goddamn parent I know was praying for every day for more than a year and have been thankful for ever since. These people are all self-centered idiotic sociopaths, nothing more.

Melissa Gira Grant@melissagiragrant.com · 3d ago

if you hated covid "lockdowns" try long covid

I spent two years working to help desperately sick people who were unsure what to do thanks to this lying raccoon eater. All healthcare and public health workers then were heroes doing the best they could with information that changed daily.

Dr. Lucky Tran@luckytran.com · 3d ago

I worked for New York’s largest medical center at the start of the pandemic. There were morgue trucks on the streets. They set up emergency medical tents in Central Park. Healthcare worker colleagues died. It is horrific that RFK Jr is on national TV lying that ICUs were empty.

THINGS ALLOWED TO BE ANXIOUS WHEN THEY HAVE UNEXPRESSED THOUGHTS - infants - cocker spaniels - your buddy Craig who works at 7-11 and is high all the time THINGS NOT ALLOWED TO BE ANXIOUS - people who can launch nuclear weaponry

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 3d ago

Sen. John Kennedy on Trump's blatant reflecting pool lies: "The president says it was caused by vandals. I don't know if he really believes that or it's part of his political messaging or he's just thinking out loud ... he grows anxious when he has an unexpressed thought."

So if I understand this right, Spain invades Africa and essentially overstays its visa, but then Africans invade those parts of Africa that Spain holds and say they’re now in Europe? Seems very 2026 to me.

The New York Times@nytimes.com · 5d ago

Ceuta is one of two cities on the African mainland that are officially part of Europe. Tens of thousands of migrants in recent days have entered the territory, deepening tensions over a border that has long troubled the relationship between the two governments. Here's what to know. nyti.ms/4fvVztT

Fascism thrives in contradictions: COVID was a hoax that never hurt anybody. It's also a terrible pandemic and Fauci must be held responsible. The COVID vaccine killed millions. MRNA vaccines are a crime against humanity. Also Trump invented the COVID vaccine and must be credited for it.

Don Moynihan@donmoyn.bsky.social · 7d ago

New, from me: It is fine to disagree with aspects of the pandemic response. But what we saw at Fauci's hearing was something different: a show trial where cranks tried to threaten and shift blame to an public servant. Here is why this is bad for all of us.🧵 donmoynihan.substack.com/p/watching-t...

This is news? The vaunted NYT is noticing this just now and making like Capt. Obvious?

The New York Times@nytimes.com · last wk.

Dubai Chocolate has become a worldwide phenomenon for good reason: Few can resist the combination of rich chocolate and creamy pistachios punctuated by crispy bits of toasted kataifi. This cake transforms those flavors into a showstopping dessert with stunning layers.

Rand Paul--who doesn't believe in evolution--holding a hearing of Dr. Fauci--a retired, life-long public servant-- while we are *actively* in the midst of SEVERAL disease outbreaks due to unnecessary public health cuts and corporate lobbying shows exactly how unserious Republicans are.

hundreds of millions got the COVID vaccine and there were so few problems that the main form of criticism turned into "friend-of-a-friend" hearsay stories, so this guy can't actually cite an actual case but knows his base will think they know people who know people this may have happened to

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · last wk.

Sen. Roger Marshall: "Who didn't have a friend who took this vaccine and had some time of complication? A stroke, a blood clot, a young man getting some type of heart inflammation. That's what destroyed the trust in the American people for our government."

"Remigration" is the polite term for forced deportations of unwanted minorities and ethnic cleansing. The punishment for being a "traitor" is execution. But yeah, you've got to stay on Twitter for baseball highlights or some shit. I get it.

Toby Buckle@polphilpod.bsky.social · last wk.

the restore 'remigration' plan musk has endorsed would see 10 million brits forcibly expelled

Actually, under this system the current president would have fewer votes than my middle class self does. It penalizes tax cheats. (Still not endorsing it of course because it’s dumb.)

Taulby Edmondson@taulby.bsky.social · last wk.

I love when these guys discover centuries-old arguments and think it's breaking news.

new political axis just dropped

OK, we all have a love/hate relationship with the NYT, but bring the love for this one. Not just great reporting, but real courage in the face of government repression. A guaranteed Pulitzer next May

Eric Lipton NYT@ericlipton.nytimes.com · 2w ago

JUST POSTED: A deep investigation by The NYT of shortcuts taken to get President Trump his Qatari-donated plane in time for POTUS to show it off during 250th anniversary events-compromises that leave the plane more vulnerable to potential threats (Free link) www.nytimes.com/2026/07/25/u...

If his neighbor is a cannibal, I see a solution that would satisfy numerous interests.

Mrs. Betty Bowers@mrsbettybowers.bsky.social · 2w ago

"No clingy purple blouses! No kitten mule heels! No Doris Day clam digger slacks! I'm being deprived of EVERYTHING! And yet, somehow, able to tweet about it . . ."

Imagine if Kamala Harris had campaigned like this. Imagine if NYT and WaPO would publish like this, and CNN and MSNBC and ABC and NPR would broadcast like this.

Mayor Zohran Kwame Mamdani@mayor.nyc.gov · 2w ago

Benjamin Netanyahu is a war criminal.

Not to be pedantic, but fans of Cartier-Bresson would argue that a crop is an edit. (And also in this case the end justifies whatever means, so fine.)

Helen Kennedy@helenkennedy.com · 2w ago

I think it's a crop, not an edit

World Cup trivia- Donald Trump is the first convicted rapist and pedophile to fondle the World Cup trophy.

What is it with dogs and sticks! 🐕🪾😂

This would work just as well for the communications firm I work for.

National Security Counselors 🕵@nationalsecuritylaw.org · 2w ago

I think I have a new slogan for the firm

The administration is in favor of gender-affirming care now? It just depends on which gender, I guess. So confusing.

Matthew Gault@mjgault.bsky.social · 3w ago

Hegseth announced they're gonna start screening for T and administering testosterone treatment for warriors found wanting

I’m gonna be forced to talk about headlines and euphemisms and passive voice and the obscuring of harm and responsibility again aren’t I…

Miami Herald@miamiherald.com · 3w ago

NEW: A 28-year-old man died Tuesday morning following an encounter with Immigration and Customs Enforcement and Homeland Security Investigations agents in St. Augustine, marking the third death involving ICE in a week.

Don’t get me started, man.

Hamilton Nolan@hamiltonnolan.bsky.social · 3w ago

News organizations should periodically stop and look in the mirror and ask themselves “Have we internalized copspeak to the point that our headlines indistinguishable from police department email subject lines?”

Four years ago, Biden gave a speech warning about the dangers to democracy and the networks refused to air it because it was "political." I wonder if Trump making a partisan case for relitigating the 2020 election and calling for his political opponents to be jailed is going to be "political" too?

Matt Negrin still host of Hardball on MSNBC@mattnegrin.bsky.social · 3w ago

As has been the case for six years any news outlet taking trump live thursday night after he said he’ll lie about the 2020 election and the legitimacy of georgia’s senators is explicitly endorsing that lie as a legitimate opinion

I avoid AI for similar reasons that I avoid meth: maybe I'd become more productive in the short term, or maybe I'd spend 36 hours disassembling a lawn mower and sorting the parts into neat little piles and develop a crippling addiction. Who's to say!

Great job 👏

Lindsey Graham on Gaza: "Just flatten it, like we flattened Tokyo and Berlin." Lindsey Graham on the Iran War: "We are going to make tons of money." Lindsey Graham on Renée Nicole Good: "She deserved what happened. She provoked ICE." As grandma used to say: GOOD RIDDANCE TO BAD RUBBISH.

Deeply saddened to learn of the loss of my dear friend Satan, the Prince of Lies. Though we often disagreed about matters such as the appropriate role of torture in the afterlife, I will most remember how his quick wit and affable nature made our weekly golf outings a ritual. He will be missed.