Marzipan felt I was moving too slowly preparing her breakfast this morning.

Just going to put this Samus Aran logo right here next to this guy's sweatshirt with a logo for a local construction company.

Sitting at a high school football game and I'd just like to reiterate, when I take over the world, the song Seven Nation Army will be outlawed.

It's good to occasionally be reminded JD Vance only seems smart because he's often juxtaposed with Donald Trump.

Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com · 2d ago

Q: How do you define socialism personally? JD VANCE: I think in reality what it actually means in the American context is you want to replace American workers with foreigners workers, and you want boys to play in girls' sports

When Trump and Roger Clemens get on stage together the assholery is so dense even light can't escape. apnews.com/article/trum...

Trump says he'll award fireballer Roger Clemens the Presidential Medal of Freedom

President Donald Trump has announced he will award the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Roger Clemens, calling him “maybe the greatest pitcher of all time.”

apnews.com

Going to sleep fine tonight. Suck it, New York.

"I said, come on Fhqwhgads."

Daniel Bellingradt@dbellingradt.bsky.social · 4d ago

Wrong answers only. My bet: thanks for all the fish.

If you see this, quote skeet with a bat.

Michael Keaton Applauds Meme

Alt: Michael Keaton at an awards show with a black sports coat and a white shirt with an open collar. He gestures "come here" with the first two fingers on both hands.

static.klipy.com

🌯👻 Boorito Zen 👻🌯@burritozen.net · 4d ago

If you see this, quote skeet with a bat

RIP Tim Curry, you scared the shit out of me when I was 10 years old.

Pennywise the Clown Watching in Bathtub

Alt: Tim Curry as Pennywise the Clown, looking somewhat jovial while standing half in/half out of a locker room shower drain. He puts his right elbow on the floor and rests his chin on it.

static.klipy.com

Sleepy Hollow Reviews 🎃🐎@sleepingvillage.bsky.social · 6d ago

In honor of scary media month: what is the first piece of media you remember truly frightening you as a child?

A day late, but happy Caturday from Marzipan.

I look like a chubby 8th grader when I shave. In fact, my girlfriend has never seen me without a beard and I'm a *little* nervous what will happen when she does.

Jennifer Ouellette@jenlucpiquant.bsky.social · 6d ago

What’s the point of beards? www.popsci.com/science/why-...

As a Patriots fan, I feel it is important to point out that Robert Kraft can fuck right off to the moon.

Yashar Ali 🐘@yasharali.bsky.social · last wk.

1. Tonight at Gillette Stadium, Zach Bryan, one of the biggest country music artists in the world, wore a Free Palestine shirt onstage. Gillette Stadium is owned by Robert Kraft, who pushed Ed Sheeran and his promoter to drop Macklemore from his tour. Bryan isn’t just a major country artist.

Use a GIF, pic, or vid to share how you are feeling today 🩶

geist, now with double the hauntings@prettyvulgar.bsky.social · last wk.

It's time for a midweek mood check! Use a GIF, pic, or vid to share how you are feeling today 🩶

It's almost as if actual facts are completely meaningless to him...

Matthew Gertz@mattgertz.bsky.social · last wk.

President Trump's demands for Fox propaganda are getting even more bizarre and extreme.

Post a vampire that isn't Dracula.

Danie Ware@danacea.bsky.social · last wk.

Vampire that isn't Dracula

A bold prediction: I'm going to regret staying up this late to watch the Red Sox lose.

Hey, do you know what is definitely not the same? "I've never heard 'Choosin' Texas'" (which is what the headline says) and "I've never heard OF 'Choosin' Texas'" (which is literally the very first line of the article). Those are different things. www.rollingstone.com/music/music-...

What Some Folks Really Mean When They Claim to Have Never Heard 'Choosin' Texas'

Claiming to have never heard Ella Langley's record-setting country song 'Choosin' Texas' is similar to saying, 'I listen to anything but country.'

rollingstone.com

"Congenital measles is a disease that’s rarely, if ever, seen in the U.S.," until now!! We're gonna be #1 in the WOOOOOOORRRRLD!!! #USA #USA #USA

Rachel Maddow@maddow.bsky.social · 2w ago

"At least six babies in Pennsylvania have been born infected with measles, with two so sick they had to be admitted to intensive care. Congenital measles is a disease that’s rarely, if ever, seen in the U.S..." www.nbcnews.com/health/healt...

It will be a difficult thing, but I will not be playing the new Crazy Taxi game. (J/k, I wasn't going to play it anyway.)

Game Informer@gameinformer.com · 4mo ago

Sega confirms and responds to generative AI content in the new Crazy Taxi. "Generative AI was used to support our teams during the development of background assets for Crazy Taxi: World Tour," Sega says. gameinformer.com/2026/06/07/s...

OH HEY, LOOK WHAT FINALLY CAME.

FUCK YES BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS

Ygrene@ygrene.bsky.social · 2w ago

let’s goooooooo

I last consumed alcohol on September 23, 2023, but because I got sober in Taipei, Taiwan, my 3 year anniversary is technically today. I'll wait until tomorrow to celebrate though.

On this #HobbitDay let us celebrate Bandobras "the Bullroarer" Took, whose reaction to the invasion of the Northfarthing of the Shire by a band of orcs was to decapitate the orcs' leader with a club. When the fascists arrive, fight!

Orkney Library & Archive@orkneylibrary.bsky.social · 3w ago

Today is #HobbitDay because Bilbo and Frodo Baggins were both born on September 22nd. Normally we'd shire a hobbit pun or two but it might just feel like a tolkien gesture and we don't want to embarrass our elves. Anyway it's a good day to come and boromir #Tolkien books. 📚

My father worked for a Japanese company in the early/mid-80s and someone had returned from a trip to Tokyo with a Famicom and a copy of Super Mario Bros. I was allowed to play with the it while visiting my dad's office and nothing has been the same since.

Retro Blast 👻@retroblastpod.com · 3w ago

What's your "origin" video game? Most gamers have a lot of favorite games, sure, but there's always one that basically 𝘥𝘦𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴 you. I'm talking about the game that flipped that little switch in your brain and made into a life-long gamer. So, which game is 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧𝙨?

This is why I think it's so important to push back against the personification of LLMs. If a person shoots someone while wearing a hand puppet, they can't claim the hand puppet did the murder.

Courtney Milan@courtneymilan.com · 3w ago

Referring to the harm as being caused by LLMs, when it is caused by people, actually serves to exonerate the people as if they did not make explicit decisions.

New contender for the ultimate "Imagine if Obama said it" submission

Razzball@razzball.bsky.social · 3w ago

lmao

While Trump is both a liar and delusional, it's important to remember that he is also deeply, deeply stupid.

George Conway ⚖️🇺🇸@gtconway.bsky.social · 3w ago

I usually attribute Trump's bizarre ramblings to either his psychopathic lying or his psychotic delusions, or some combination of the two. But this is just him being an economically illiterate moron.

Heeeey, do you know how progressives are definitely NOT going to win this? By throwing the most vulnerable among us under the bus. Fuck Marcy Kaptur and fuck this. Trans rights are human rights motherfucker.

Erin Reed@erininthemorning.com · 3w ago

Holy shit. Marcy Kaptur becomes the latest Dem to release an anti-trans ad, and its worse than all the rest combined. "I voted WITH Republicans to keep transgender ideology out of schools, and let me be clear, boys should NOT play in girls sports." This is getting out of control.

What scene makes you emotional matter how many times you see it? "I love you, Penny. I've always loved you. I'm so sorry. I love you!"

Puff the Magic Hater@mskellymhayes.bsky.social · 3w ago

What scene makes you emotional no matter how many times you see it? 😭 ("You don't know what it's like to be a coward" gets me every time.)