I ♥️ SEGFAULTS

Sorry ✋️ I don't believe in the kind of mumbo jumbo that makes it harder to write incorrect code

Haskell programming language@haskell.org · last wk.

But you can have a machine-verified way of keeping track of your state changes! Today! This is not science-fiction! We have the technology!

YOU CANT CHANGE THE WORLS WITHOUT CHAMGING SOME STATE

Giacomo Cavalieri@giacomocavalieri.me · 4w ago

I love mutable state I love pointers I love changing the value of variables, yes I want more &mut please

Does the cryptography community have a backup plan for if Alice and Bob ever break up?

shonen anime about static analysis. season 1 ends with the protagonist learning to apply the knaster tarski theorem

I don't use any Microsoft products but I make sure to install at least a couple in case any hackers ever need full access to my machine

The past years have seen horrendous attacks towards trans people. We have a duty to protect the most vulnerable members of our communities. There is no Haskell without the trans people who have shaped it through the years. This June is a month of celebrations, but the struggle continues. ✊🏳️‍⚧️λ

(builds a mechanism) hey i think this might be god???

When the codebase lowkey has nutty putty cave vibes

The established best practice is to Not

Eniko Fox@enikofox.com · 3mo ago

are there any good ways for dealing with json in C? preferably single header library

PLEASE never follow programming languages on social media in hopes of dating them

The GNU C Library@glibc.bsky.social · 3mo ago

@c-official.bsky.social do you love me 🥺

The major reason why LLMs suck at writing C has been out in the open for years but nobody is ready to talk about it www.wired.com/story/openai...

OpenAI Really Wants Codex to Shut Up About Goblins

“Never talk about goblins, gremlins, raccoons, trolls, ogres, pigeons, or other animals or creatures unless it is absolutely and unambiguously relevant,” reads OpenAI’s coding agent instructions.

wired.com

Tip: NEVER use a random number. A non deterministic "solution" is unworthy of the divine touch of a turing machine

Kill the QA in your head

Being decrypted probably feels amazing for a message

backslash undoubtedly the worst character of all time. absolute diva of a symbol aaalways needs some kind of special treatment. super toxic vibes

What if there was a man in the middle attack but the man in the middle was like, really chill. What if he was basically a chill guy who didn't mind if you sent a secret or whatever

Pleaaaaaase cast this void pointer to an int pointer. Nothing bad will happen I promise. Plssss

Jana H-S (she, like a knife)@jana-aych-ess.bsky.social · 6mo ago

make language beg for it

have you seen the new supply chain vuln? don't update tubu. it's literally on heebee. they got poodee's deps. they infiltrated dippy. roll back weeno. disable scripts in ~/.gumpyrc. it's in poob. do not install poob. do not update poob. uninstall poob right now. poob has it in for you.

When people suggest leaded solder it's usually because of ease of use but another cool perk is that it tastes much better

Biggest open problems in computer science: 3. Porting doom to nixos 2. Concurrent fizzbuzz 1. Making led go blink

(* said through gritted teeth, screwed-shut eyes, and a throbbing temple vein *) so true bestie....

The C Programming Language@c-official.bsky.social · 5mo ago

The great thing about C is that if your code compiles, it's correct

The great thing about C is that if your code compiles, it's correct

First of my bloodline to know what a compiler is and suffering for it

uart

David Buchanan@retr0.id · 5mo ago

the everything protocol

this joke was not written by a C programmer you can't fool me

The C Programming Language@c-official.bsky.social · 5mo ago

in the Nat club. straight up 'succing it'. and by 'it', haha, well. let's justr say. My peano.

www.theregister.com/2026/03/12/i... RIP to the man behind the funniest bit of all time: the invention of the null pointer

Quicksort inventor Tony Hoare dies at 92

Obit: Classicist, philosopher, wit, and one of the greatest British computer scientists of all time

theregister.com

in the Nat club. straight up 'succing it'. and by 'it', haha, well. let's justr say. My peano.

mom says its my turn on the random oracle

Bem@bem.neocities.org · 5mo ago

Haha, that's so quirky. Anyway, do you mind encrypting two messages for me and giving me the ciphertext of only one of them? I bet I'll neeever be able to tell which of the messages you encrypted with a non-negligible advantage if I only have access to an encryption oracle haha

Hmm i think today I will use plain RSA as a signature scheme