If you make a lot of jokes that are ok but not great, you're a comidian.

"That's So Raven!" - me watching The Crow

Rob Cee@therobcee.bsky.social · 3d ago

That's So Raven (blowing up an orphanage)

A bad gardeniner, out in the herb bed, killing thyme.

"Labour" is French for "the bour". #HappyLaborDay

Met a new cat early this #Caturday His name is Tang. He is a good boy who needs a home. I call his pattern "ghost ginger"

Wife: You should shave if you're going to. Me: I don't know, do I look rugged and handsome? Wife: You should shave.

Why didn't Machu Picchu ever evolve into Machu Pikachu?

To lighten the mood, I make a joke about premature ejaculation. She does not laugh. "Too soon?" I ask.

Met a Sith cat today.

Feels Like The First Time/Like A Virgin mashup

You misquote 100% of the quotes you don't get right.

What is the point of getting abs if the only bellies people want to touch are those of pregant women?

My “flip book” of the eclipse

New obsessions. Zanzibar in Tanzania. Baku in Azerbaijan. No real reason for either. Just memorizing the countries of the world and I find myself thinking, where is that? Do they have food? Should I go there and eat their food? Maybe they have art? What are their cemeteries like?

Every book is a Choose Your Own Adventure book, if you don't believe in free will.

I would trade the entire current administration to have Dolly back.

when you’re feeling down about yourself just remember… there are souls out there who still think about the kindness you showed them which wasn’t a big deal to you in the moment… but it was everything to them

You can't listen to the music of an different generation with the ears of that generation. The music your parents love might help you understand your parents. The music you love might help you understand yourself. The music your children love is fucking awful! How can that even be called music???

Professor Higgins: By George, she's got it! Now, once again where does it rain? Tattoo, shoving Eliza aside: The plane! The plane!

Late #Caturday Mother and son

Just brain-farting my way through life.

My NADSAQ is listed on NASDAQ.

I was always a big Keith Moon fan and one thing we’ve got in common is trashing hotel rooms. Although to be honest I’ve only ever done that on Yelp.

babe, are you okay? you’ve barely even touched your beanstachios

So from what I gather, Jesus was an OG battle rapper. He spit parable after parable, scared the robes off the scribes/Pharisees who were all like ju-tang clan ain’t nuttin to fuck w & he’s like I’m Son of Man. So they took him out solidifying him the goddest of all time 2 so many

The pleasure of my company is requested? You fools!

Last day in Spain! 6 years of Duolingo have prepared me so that when someone says something to me in Spanish, I can look at them stupidly.

Ha! Joke's on my rejection sensitivity. It turns out that I *was* uncool, and they *didn't* want me around.

Jesus, depicted here with a huge organ.

In time, the water will smooth the corners of this fountain