To learn which questions are unanswerable, and not to answer them: this skill is most needful in times of stress and darkness.

Guys:

McSweeney's@mcsweeneys.net · 4d ago

"First prize is this here gold ounce. Want to see second prize? (He pulls up his pant leg, revealing his stump.) Second prize is he eats yer fucking leg. Third prize is you drown."

This is just to say I have OCRed the text thet was in tne arch:ve and whicb yov were prabaldy seamhing for "breahtast" Fargme ms fheg mem debo:w5 sb ?mccf mmb 5c oc1b

I just hope I get to have a drink with @benloory.bsky.social some day, that’s all

Tim Melody Pratt@timpratt.org · last wk.

the sky above the port was the color of a wine-dark sea

this is the final straw for me and mr. rocket ships

Matt Novak@paleofuture.bsky.social · 2w ago

There's a reason Elon Musk rarely does interviews with real news outlets.

solomon in 1 Kings 3

every morning I wake up and look at this screenshot and laugh so much that it enables me to go on living

Weirde & obscure wordes are not an elitist control thinge. Thei have hidden all thys tyme, & thei carrye wyth them great poweres & unforeseen futures. Wordes you have to looke up are wordes that businesse hath not bent ynto sad smooth chains to harness desyre. Lookinge up wordes ys rebellion.

if these people do not in fact name their child *Valerie* I will set off 250,000 fireworks at the same time

I’ve been doing this forever, keeping very quiet about my weirdness.

Emily Nussbaum@emilynussbaum.bsky.social · 4w ago

I FOUND ANOTHER PERSON WHO DOES THE SAME SELF-DESTRUCTIVE OCD-ESQUE OBSESSIVE TURNING OF HER FIRST DRAFT PARAGRAPHS INTO WIDOW-FREE CUBES I AM NOT ALONE IN THE WORLD

you and me both, buddy

Moby Dick@mobydickatsea.bsky.social · last mo.

This whale is not dead; he is only dispirited; out of sorts, perhaps

Pro tip: When you feel uncertain about posting something, you should never post it. Instead you should open a donkey sanctuary and devote your life to helping donkeys.

SKULL OF THOMAS AQUINAS: TAKE A LEFT NOW PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going— SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti— SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE

Sardonicus@sardonicus.eu · 8mo ago

'Skull of St. Thomas Aquinas being transported to Fossanova Abbey.' Photograph by Daniel Ibanez

Kurt Vonnegut: In my book I drew an asshole as a cautionary tale Anthropic: At long last, we have created the Vonnegut Asshole

Micah Lee@micahflee.com · last mo.

I know this has been pointed out many times by many people but I just want to reiterate: Anthropic is basically using Kurt Vonnegut's drawing of an asshole as the Claude logo

A #BlueskyLullaby for tonight. Check this out—well worth a listen. See you around.

Adam Keiper@adamkeiper.com · 2mo ago

Well now here's something pretty spiffy. New out today from the New York Vocal Collective, a choral arrangement of Paul McCartney's "Blackbird." The first two and a half minutes are fine, but then it becomes…something else entirely. (You know the THX sound effect?) www.youtube.com/watch?v=n9ot...

Elon Musk’s DOGE cut the federal government’s screwworm monitoring program, which cost $15 million. Now, the Trump administration is preparing to spend $1 billion to combat the screwworm outbreak. Never forget how destructive and downright stupid DOGE was.

The Assembly of Treaty Chiefs in Alberta is calling on the RCMP and the Auditor General to investigate whether Premier Danielle Smith and the UCP government have committed treason under the criminal code. It's over the premier's handling of a referendum on separation. www.aptnnews.ca?p=289999

Chiefs in Alberta demand treason investigation into Premier, UCP

Dozens of chiefs from Treaty No. 6, No. 7 and No. 8 have voted unanimously on a resolution calling for an RCMP investigation.

aptnnews.ca

Washington Nat'l Opera sues the Kennedy Center alleging that the Center STOLE the opera's endowment. WNO had a longterm agreement where KC ran the opera's development back office, and in 2025 KC just ... stopped doing it and seized the funds. storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...

the main problem with video as a format is that it's too slow at dispensing information. I can read much faster than you can talk and there's no way you can address this without becoming incomprehensible to most of the audience.

We say it with our chests. ICE is a human rights stain on America that offends the conscience of every decent human being on planet Earth. We are going to abolish ICE and DHS and enshrine freedom of movement in the Constitution, because to do anything less is to compromise with Hell.

Mediaite@mediaite.com · 2mo ago

New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani said it is time for the Democrats to ignore party leaders, embrace a “new vision,” and call for the abolishment of U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement.

eavesdropping on a couple of english lit academics in st. john, i overheard confirmation of what is surely going to be the biggest literary news story of the year

On the eve of our submission window opening, we felt we should add an AI policy

You used to be able to google the time of the sunset, and Google would give you the exact time right on top every single time. Thankfully, with artificial intelligence, you can now ask Google what time the sun will set and it will conveniently tell you "I don't know."

I'm sorry, are we living in a fever dream

Charlie Warzel@cwarzel.bsky.social · 2mo ago

wake up babe the white house is a six flags

THE PEACE THIEVES is just one week away! “A deeply felt and deeply affecting look at the vicissitudes of war and its aftermath...” —Nino Ricci, author of THE ORIGIN OF SPECIES Available June 2nd on our website or at your favourite bookstore.

Full policy here: www.law.berkeley.edu/wp-content/u...

UC Berkeley Law creates new AI policy that bans AI for "conceptualizing, outlining, drafting, revising, translating, or editing any work submitted for credit" or exams because "thinking remains the sine qua non of good lawyering (and of a quality legal education)." That's what I'm talking about.

Guy who invents a machine that can open any lock and his customers spend two years saying it's only for when you forget your keys, then he goes on stage and opens a bank vault with it. "You can make millions!" he brags.