Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass isnhakf empty. Job advert: The glass is competitively supplied.

Rogue Trader. Yeah, I'm not living to see that money.

Nina Marotta ☢️💙@mrschief7.bsky.social · 5d ago

You're offered $250,000,000 but to claim it you must enter the last video game you've played and stay there for a full year. How are y'all faring in this deal?

JK Rowling deciding if someone is a woman

@owenjones.bsky.social you need to stop, even when he makes noises that resemble good points, referring to this buffoon as worth listening to on any subject!

Post-Left Watch@postleftwatch.bsky.social · last wk.

Tucker Carlson: "Putin, on the spectrum of Russian politics, is firmly on the moderate side." Glenn Greenwald: "Yes." Tucker: "And Pro-European, and his early career was in Europe, in East Germany as a KGB officer, famously speaks German."

I suspect Arday would still be alive if the worthless fascist shitfucks at the BBC, The Guardian, and the Telegraph hadn't dedicated every breath they spared from trying to hound all trans people to a similar fate to amplifying every unsubstantiated allegation about him into a new front page scoop.

Well, you know, people were complaining that he had a whole COBRA meeting and came out with nothing but a promise to ask shops to think about not selling so many disposable barbeques. Maybe he thinks this will convince us he's taking the impending extinction of the human species seriously?

madeline odent@oldenoughtosay.com · last wk.

I gotta be honest, I don’t feel like this is what emergency alerts are for. It’s important and severe but if I hear that noise from my phone I expect tornado idk

Fresh out of the COBRA meeting about the drought and wildfires where the only action point generated was "asking shops to sell fewer disposable barbeques", a deliberate and calculated measure to ensure the situation gets worse and worse.

The Guardian@theguardian.com · last wk.

Andy Burnham moves to cut new EV sales targets

The main character in James Patterson's latest murder mystery is monstering at a LARP event. It's a crewdunnit.

Serious Freud Office@seriousfreudoffice.bsky.social · last wk.

The main character in James Patterson's latest murder mystery is King Henry VIII. It's a Tudunit.

COUNT BINFACE'S VOTER LEVEL IS OVER 9000!

Dark Souls. Playing DnD with a DM who obsessively needs to win is no fun. I just remember sitting there thinking "if this game wasn't so fucking ugly to look at, I'd probably be sadder that I'm never going to see 99% of it".

Kristin 🇨🇦🤓@faierius.bsky.social · 2w ago

No hate, no dogpiling, just curious. For me, it's Skyrim. Don't know why, considering it should be exactly my kind of game, but it just didn't click for me.

The thing is, now you should think about the people with ADHD on these meds and how ‘normal’ they seem, and extrapolate to how they experience the world _without_ those meds working…

Matt@itsmattagain.bsky.social · 2w ago

Man without ADHD tries uppers for the first time: I mean honestly we're scraping the barrel on this now surely. I'm not diabetic. If I took insulin the affects would be far worse.

Remember: Do not stare directly at the sun during the eclipse! Only stare directly at the sun during regular full daylight

Today is the 47th anniversary of this clearly unimprovable photo, from a story so absurd that it shouldn’t be true, but is: the day a team of workers from British Waterways pulled the plug out of the Chesterfield Canal, and all the water emptied out

It's the uniforms. The Nazis had great uniforms. That is why people think authoritarianism and Fascism are about order. They aren't about order. They're about permission. Permission for people to be their worst selves. 🧵

Could we just not? Please? Have none of these fucking goons seen or read any science fiction? Are they trying to recreate the ones that scared them most as children to get over the old trauma? Is that it? Little jimmy wet himself during The Andromeda Strain so now we all have to die?

The New York Times@nytimes.com · 2w ago

Breaking News: Scientists have used A.I. to create new viruses for the first time, raising hopes for medical advances while also raising the possibility that the technology could someday be used to invent dangerous pathogens.

If you see this, quote the energy you bring to Bluesky.

Wtf You On About Withnail And I

Alt: Wtf You On About Withnail And I

static.klipy.com

Mike Brooks@mikebrooks668.bsky.social · 3w ago

If you see this, quote the energy you bring to Bluesky

I think "AI" plumpers should be happy I'm focusing mostly on the nonsense it's doing to my field, rather than how it's very clearly designed as a tool for the capture of wealth and capital by a bunch of accelerationist weirdos enthusiastically huffing their own farts from the depth of their K-holes

The Register@theregister.com · 3w ago

Sci-fi authors Scalzi and Stross decry AI's dystopian impact on their craft

Asteroid strike on the moon.

Call Me Al by Paul Simon is, in fact, the opening chapters of 90% of cyberpunk narratives.

Along with everything else to despise about Farage: "Inciteful" FUUUUCK OOOOFFFFFF IT'S NOT A FUCKING WORD

If we Jews are the "chosen people" as some claim, then I have little doubt that we must have been chosen to call out Israel's genocide and war crimes, which it has had the effrontery to carry out in our name.

Newsfeed algorithms are funny things aren't they.

The other vile excuse people use is "it's not genocide because there are still Palestinians. As if the fact that I exist means the Holocaust wasn't q genocide. As if stuffing your pockets with produce and running isn't shoplifting until you get home and eat it. It's a genocide in progress.

@elizabelta.bsky.social · 4w ago

I used to think that the problem with the Fucking Sensibles, the bland and featureless centrist dregs who took over the Labour Party and deliberately lost two general elections when they briefly lost their grip on the leadership was their pessimistic belief that Managed Decline was the best... 🧵

the whole "women's sports exist to protect women from men" framing is hilarious, given that a lot of these divisions were initially formed because men were deeply embarrassed any time a woman beat them at a sport olympic shooting was mixed gender right up until a woman won the gold

"They don't even bother to lie badly anymore, I suppose that's the final humiliation".

🕹️ Davey Sloan 👾@sloanysoft.itch.io · last mo.

She should definitely have got some financial advice by now.

okay from a quick google she has appeared in at least ten separate "I am an old pensioner and can't afford to heat my rural bungalow that I live in by myself" articles in the past 5 years

Elaine in this article "can't remember the last time she used her oven" but also spends £200 a month on petrol (so driving probably ~50 miles a day?) (she's also a professional old person; she was on Good Morning Britain last year, and then also at the Nov budget, and the year before lmao)

'I can't afford to turn the oven on': 7.4m households struggling to buy essentials

As Andy Burnham promises “breathing space” for households, millions are unable to buy items such as clothing, heating and food.

bbc.co.uk

Just realised that when the chuds talk about "historical accuracy" in movies, they mean "like the history and bible films I grew up watching with my dad that were shot while the US had segregation and Hollywood would cast John Wayne as literally any ethnicity that might appear in the narrative"