CHAFETZ PLANS TO LOSE WEIGHT ON ALL-FRENCH-FRY-AND-GIN DIET

FinTwitter@fintwitter.bsky.social · 11h ago

SPACEX PLANS MOON FACTORIES POWERED BY HUMANOID ROBOTS

Awful idea from a dream I had: Shows, but especially anime, should offer not just language dubs, but regional dubs. If I want to watch a version of Neon Genesis Evangelion where everyone is from Southie, that should be an option available to me. "Get in the fackin' robot, Shinji, I swear to God."

[running into my ex- and her new guy at the grocery store] “I’m dating someone new as well.” “What’s her name?” [looking around wildly] “uh…Kerrie Mayona.”

Buy Mass Effect The Board Game!@ithayla.bsky.social · 4d ago

this was on sale at the supermarket. dee took one sniff and said 'that smells like europe to me' (it's a curry mayo)

say what you will about AI, always-on voice recording and auto dictation has been a game changer for my workflows. Save post and close app. Yeah Footlong meatball sub on white. No veggies. Don't toast it. Ranch and barbecue sauce. Yeah, ranch and bargecue sauce. More. More. Little more please

We could have had Wikler!

Scott Lemieux@lemieuxlgm.bsky.social · last wk.

The DNC needs new leadership, immediately: www.nytimes.com/2026/07/26/u...

A non-zero part of this is that giving to a D politician, literally any of them, gets you on a list with more texts and emails than you could ever imagine, each of them less trustworthy-looking than the last. I donated to a local race and now I get stuff for establishment Ds in other states. GTFO

Dean Obeidallah@deanobeidallah.bsky.social · 2w ago

Democratic National Committee is horribly struggling. Republican National Committee is sitting on nearly $130 million. While DNC is $2 million in debt. Bad management of DNC but also another sign that the energy in the Dem base is for change--not the establishment. www.nytimes.com/2026/07/26/u...

I never really understood road rage, until today.

This is painful and embarrassing, but I don’t have any choice right now www.gofundme.com/f/help-richa...

Donate to Help Richard Keep the Lights On and Feed His Cat, organized by Richard Kadrey

This is painful and embarrassing, but I don’t have any choice right … Richard Kadrey needs your support for Help Richard Keep the Lights On and Feed His Cat

gofundme.com

I realize that practically everyone in this strip is Damaged in some way but giving Crystal “apocalyptically terrible taste in men” is kinda mean

Dreamboat Branny 🦢@bransonreese.bsky.social · 2w ago

swanboy.com/comic/you-ag...

HOME DEPOT: We didn't tweak the design or anything. The skeleton just started doing it on its own. And the only thing it says is the exact date that you will die. We cannot kill it because it was born dead.

Chappell Ellison@chappelltracker.bsky.social · 3w ago

They say innovation is dead but

"parasite outbreak blamed on taco bell because they're the only company reporting it" feels very "1918 flu blamed on Spain because they're the only country reporting it"

Ah, Landsman. As sure as the sunrise. The OH legislature has gerrymandered me out of his district for the upcoming election (and into some R+12 horeshit) so I get to go from a Rep I'm embarrassed about to one I actively wish to see dragged in front of a tribunal. Mmmmm, representative democracy.

Prem Thakker ツ@premthakker.bsky.social · 3w ago

Here are all 98 Democrats who voted *against* the amendment to cut military aid to Israel. As well, the 10 Democrats who voted "present":

Goodbye, little buddy. You weren’t here for nearly as long as you should have been, but it’s hard to feel cheated about the time I had.

Finding out this morning’s news by waking up to the Fark.com headline “Lindsey Graham beats Mitch McConnell to death” is just… i tip my cap to you, Subby. Bra-vo.

Really hoping for a shot of Argentina's little libertarian elf president in the crowd. Show me that freak doing air guitar for some reason while looking like rockabilly Dudley Moore.

I said this aloud in a crowded room of England fans when one of the final Norway shots sailed over the goal. felt AMAZING

Seth Rosenthal@sethrosenthal.bsky.social · 3mo ago

saw a truck for a company called Absolute Chimneys and I can’t stop saying that to myself as if I’m an English soccer announcer calling a free kick that sailed over the crossbar

Took the kid to Chicago for the first time this weekend. I had forgotten how much I enjoy this city, particularly in the summer

Guy Falls Night

The Journal@thejournal.ie · 4w ago

A man has died following a fall from a bonfire in Belfast during an Eleventh Night event. jrnl.ie/7098876t

“Why don’t we build the whole plane out of the black box” but for “market price” showing up on a menu

David_j_roth@davidjroth.bsky.social · last mo.

Business idea: algorithmic-style Dynamic Pricing at restaurants. You can get French onion soup for $1.75 when it's really hot out, but a tomato salad costs $57 in August. Everyone hates it; Softbank has already contributed $150m in funding just off the concept.

Man got Chotiner’d without even agreeing to an interview. Astounding

v funny to see all the europeans getting extremely mad at us for celebrating the balogun unsuspension in a rabidly partisan manner do you want us to get into soccer or not

Bluesky is both the sports app and the Catholic schism app, everything you’d need in one place

Between Chuck throwing his brother in the dungeon, Bob from Chicago excommunicating schismatics, and drunk Pete’s Christian fundamentalist military getting bogged down in an ill-advised adventure in the Middle East, medieval fans are eating good.

hammancheez@hammancheez.bsky.social · last mo.

People : oh wow they ordained those illegal bishops i wonder what the pope might d- Pope : EXCOMMUNICATE DAY WOO People : u didnt let me fin- Pope : I DIDNT STUTTER JIMMY

I’m so SICK of false advertising, y’all! I drank this whole thing and you’ll never guess what I had to do not even an hour later.

5-4 on an amendment whose language is so plain a fourth grader couldn't misinterpret it

ElieNYC@elienyc.bsky.social · last mo.

Christ, Kavanaugh joined the judgement but dissented on the Constitutional question... meaning that the vote is only 5-4 that the 14th Amendment exists.

I feel like she, specifically, should know better

i asked if my 6yo was bored and he said “a little bit” and i said “why don’t you go play with magna tiles” and he said “that’s still a little bit boring” and i said “what!! playing with magna tiles is the most exciting thing in the whole world!!” and he said “that’s not TRUE, you’re just FORTY”

The thing about me recommending shows is that I personally hate getting recommendations. You could recommend me to myself and I’d be like “get fucked.”

Extreme carceral Buddhist government that sentences you to 2 consecutive life sentences so when you die in prison and reincarnate into a random pond frog they find it and throw its ass in the slammer too

Looking up “pearls before swine” and getting this post

lauren@lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · last mo.

it was literature pub quiz night and our team name "flowers for algae gone" didn't get a single laugh, this isn't the country i grew up in