Mr John Robertson
@robbotron.bsky.social
Comic/Cult Leader/THE DARK ROOM 🍍 London. Work: Lee@gagreflex.co.uk UK Tour Sept - December PLUS Oct 10th PAXAUS, Nov 18-21 NYC, Nov 22nd London and SO MANY MORE
𝟏.) 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐉𝐨𝐡𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐁𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭 This gift option isn’t just 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴, it’s 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 —with the added benefit of being perfect for the woman who has it all! 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘏𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘑𝘰𝘩𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘉𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘴𝘵 fits your requirements that your present be 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 and 𝘯𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘺, but 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘭 for a budding courtship.
AI COMPANIES: “People who don’t use AI agents just aren’t aware of the vast power they possess to do anything.” NORMAL PEOPLE: “Wow, okay, wow. Sounds great. What can they do? Give me your top example.” AI COMPANIES: “The hardest task of all: Checking you into a flight!”
The UK Arts & Ents industry contributes over £10bn to the UK economy a year & one of these days our politicians might even realise that instead writing it off as icky girlie flouncing bc you can't do a photoshoot in a hard hat & hi-vis gilet at the national theatre without looking like a tit
Danielle Blake@abradacabla.bsky.social · yesterdayI mean for one thing Neil, if you guys invested in the arts at all you’d have come up with a less embarrassing riff on the Bayeux Tapestry than that AI slop
THE DARK ROOM hits Barnfield Theatre Exeter 7:45pm tonight! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ “Rocky Horror for nerds… reader, I howled” Telegraph “NOT TO BE MISSED” Guardian Happy to be there? YES! Pleased by the 1am train home? NO Grab a ticket (not for the train) exeternorthcott.co.uk/book/?show=7...
John Robertson: The Dark Room Live Performance
Alt: The Dark Room, a pale man with long black hair whose face is illuminated only by a torch, shakes his head at you. He is wearing American football armour covered with fluorescent tubing and metal spikes.
static.klipy.com
Tonight’s glamour of showbiz: after finishing a set with pizza fellatio, a point about colonialism and the restoration of a man’s stolen fluids, I’m now on the street waiting for a late night bus and watching a man in lederhosen play ping pong inside a hostel. What in the Bob Dylan lyrics is this
My current ick is seeing people in the arts use AI for posters/anything at all. I don’t care if you’re a kids choir or a small amateur dramatics group, make your own poster, make it part of *your* art and, crucially, not the same as every other death/agreement machine creation.
This will end with monks in remote towers, hiding from the forces of barbarism, keeping culture alive by carefully handwriting copies of vintage Harry Potter slashfic.
Gianmarco Soresi@gianmarcosoresi.bsky.social · 3d agoMf gonna turn me catholic
i worry that men think being A Good Guy is dramatically and heroically intervening on behalf of an endangered woman and then being publicly rewarded on a grand scale when actually being A Good Guy is just usually saying, “hey man that’s not funny” or “wow that’s fucked up” and there is no reward
The difference in UK and US temperament is in the UK we “couldn’t care less” and the Yanks “could care less”. So the UK starts at complete disinterest, but the US has an innate level of enthusiasm that still has the capacity to move downwards. The Aussies, of course, don’t give a fuck.
I feel like it’s worse to bully someone in your community until they’re homeless and financially destitute than it is to report on people doing that
I had a vasectomy last week and am still extremely jet-lagged from my U.S trip. Why these details? Because I did a set last night where the jetlag + pain in my balls collided til I was in a daze, which meant I repeatedly said “I had a vasectomy” and never elaborated. New catchphrase?
John Robertson (@robbotron.bsky.social) has spent 23 years playing video games, doing comic-cons and getting paid to say rude words in public. Join him at #EPIC49 as he roasts the games he loves, sticks the D in D&D and tells dirty stories about geek celebrities he’s annoyed.
I regret to inform you I have written the whole poem. Ed Sheeran’s “The Raven” awaits you at www.facebook.com/johnrobertsoncomedy
Mr John Robertson@robbotron.bsky.social · 2w agoQuoth the raven, “Macklemore”.
People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, but congrats on buying a house, I guess
BREAKING: Bibbsy Bobbins says he would "kick" Guzzle-man and "make him fall over"
I don’t care billionaires think about any country. They don’t live with or near normal people, they sit on social media, have about 12 mates who are just like them and think the world’s turned to shit because the poors are rude to them online. Mental illness with no relief, just an extreme budget.
Sorry I was late, there was an elephant in my room that needed acknowledging
Saw The Odyssey, loved it. Christopher Nolan makes huge movies to watch on huge screens with your hands in your ears every time the bass makes your intestines shake. Didn’t think the movie was having any real emotional affect on me, then I wept through a fight scene. A modern epic. Fab.
"Oh but it didn't FEEL like he ran those marathons" "But tinned g&ts on the HS1 doesn't FEEL fashy" "That dodgy poll funded by reform FELT legit" "It FEELS like Al, Alex & their rhyming kids can't go on 5 holidays bc of boarding school VAT" "It FEELS like that school has a litter box for furries"
Have you seen my snooker table, Doris? No farmer Griffiths. I haven't seen any snooker tables at all this morning.
"What if I buy bootleg merch and pirate the show" What if you put your head in a toilet and your feet in some mayonnaise jars. What if you roll yourself in bubble wrap and stamps and send yourself to France. What if you have an emotional affair with an assymetrical rock. Lots of things one can do
I hope these rabid shits are identified and arrested for the assault, especially the woman In glasses pulling her hair. I thought Reform was all about freedom of speech?
Dave Vetter@davidrvetter.bsky.social · last mo.Content warning: Multiple men violently assault a female protester at Reform's conference at the Birmingham NEC, to the visible delight of Nigel Farage.
Call me a lefty snowflake traitor, but crowing over a woman being assaulted by multiple men (one with a stick) while under investigation for a £5m bung & losing two senior aides for illegal donor fraud is not a brilliant look. Expect serious defensive leaning in Nigel dismissing this at any moment.
Dave Vetter@davidrvetter.bsky.social · last mo.Content warning: Multiple men violently assault a female protester at Reform's conference at the Birmingham NEC, to the visible delight of Nigel Farage.
Can always tell when I’m tired, cos I’ll hear something mundane like “like, share and subscribe” and mutter “your mum likes, shares and subscribes.” Today’s new one? “Your mum’s early works don’t reflect the colourful impressionist masterpieces with which he’d later become associated.”
The Nerd Reich wants to destroy democracy, and its mask has slipped
ANALYSIS: Silicon Valley fascism is waging war on democracy
The author of The Nerd Reich: Silicon Valley Fascism and the War on Democracy, has a warning.
abc.net.au
