@iammardikins.bsky.social @colonelescargot.bsky.social @nickynoo007.bsky.social I found film of our last party/unholy cannibal festival

@nickynoo007.bsky.social @iammardikins.bsky.social I discovered a device that lets you see what’s happening in @colonelescargot.bsky.social’s mind

There once were 3 Trappist monks who had taken a vow of silence, but their Abbot rewarded them for their good service by allowing each one to say just one sentence on their saint's day in successive years. In the first year, the first monk said "Cream first"...

... In the second year, the second monk said "Jam first" In the third year, the third monk said "I just wish you two would bloody well shut up about those damned scones!"

My autobiography 'I thought that cunt died years ago' will be available in no good bookshops from Monday.

I’m always in the shadows & behind people. As @nickynoo007.bsky.social says “shoot them in the back. It’s much safer. Remember, you want them dead, not to respect you”’

Another tough call with Mum tonight. She's so ranty and disillusioned about so much, while simultaneously sounding normal. It messes with my head and makes me feel guilty. Fuck vascular dementia! Fuck Alzheimers! Fuck all dementia! And fuck brexit!

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

My epitaph? Found pissed in a ditch.

I saw the interview you did, when you were at school

Just talked to Mum ❤️. Feeling sad and emotional. She was fairly lucid. We talked about politics and the dreadful behaviour of the Argentinian football team. It's easy when she's confused and ranting conspiracy theories. On days like these, I just want to demand her release or break her out of there.

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

Gabby: What was your highlight of the half time show? Wayne Rooney: When it finished. I thought it was crap. 10/10 punditry. No notes.

Aye, he does The touchy feeling give him the creeps so I do a mental health check every few days, if I feel sane enough to talk about very personal things without an @infinitescream.bsky.social

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 2w ago

@wulfhelm.bsky.social is going to LOVE this!

The deep breath before the plunge.

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 2w ago

Is

Mum's take on the England v France game. I love that she's enjoying watching and has her favourites, but I also love the way she expressed herself today (nothing like she used to), "France did not turn up in the first half did they. I am backing Spain tonight - but I have been mostly wrong so-far 💖"

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

WULFERHAMPTON MUSTER! We need a session of group hugs, and general support and milling around the latrine pit, finishing off with mead hall burning. Honorary guests Phantom and Bloke. Hatboi to do a ritual stabbing and speech.. Basically, glad to be part of this mad group too xx

One of the first changes that I noticed in Mum was her use of language. She never swore. I remember her being so angry at someone once, "He's a...a...a git!".That's as bad as it got. Once. Now, she'll quite casually say fuck. I still can't quite get used to it. 1/2

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

Same here, I can deal with most shit life throws at me when it happens Being cool about it is another matter, I have a strong moral compass, and when wronged I get angry Then even If I can't I'm prone to exploding 😆 🤣 Pandguru gives perspective

As my granddad taught me, if you can’t kick a man when he’s down, how will you ever kick him when he’s standing up? Not entirely sure of the lesson here, but…

Last October I drove over to the UK as an emergency. Mum had got aggressive with Dad. He fell. Everyone felt it safer to separate them. When I arrived, I managed to persuade Mum to come away with me (no mean feat). I said it would be a girls' trip (we'd never done that before). 1/6

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

Just had my daily call with Mum. It was a short one because she loves watching the footie (and Wimbledon). I had a little cry afterwards. It's hard when she's mostly sweet and normal and only goes on about her conspiracy theories a bit. I just want to Thelma and Louise her out of there tonight! ❤️

@nickynoo007.bsky.social good to see the National Trust following the correct rules here.

National Trust@nationaltrust.org.uk · 3w ago

Wishing the England men's football team all the best for their game this evening. We've got our match snacks at the ready.

@colonelescargot.bsky.social has been putting it on...but it could be worse. youtu.be/Ivv7ewrYvUE?... @natsommers.bsky.social @firehorsep.bsky.social @devonianmatthew.bsky.social @vandyke4ad.bsky.social @bearlykat.bsky.social @skiwithstyle1.bsky.social @rogerday.bsky.social @stephenold.bsky.social

Every posh person's nightmare... | The Catherine Tate Show - BBC Comedy

YouTube video by BBC Comedy

youtu.be

Just had my daily call with Mum. It was a short one because she loves watching the footie (and Wimbledon). I had a little cry afterwards. It's hard when she's mostly sweet and normal and only goes on about her conspiracy theories a bit. I just want to Thelma and Louise her out of there tonight! ❤️

Bloke From Barnsley AKA She Who Can't Be Arsed@nickynoo007.bsky.social · 3w ago

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

I have to keep a reflective journal for the doctorate I’m doing (have to do a reflective portfolio), so I have 1 book for that, and the other one is for things that cannot go in the reflective portfolio - reflective whining is underrated as a doctoral strategy.

As we enter the sunlit uplands it can be quite difficult, initially, to absorb all of the benefits of Brexit. I congratulate myself on not having to employ 300 people anymore, it has given me so much more time to do odd jobs for those who were insulated from the fallout. 1/3

I don't post much on here, or anywhere else for that matter. In the past, I posted so much on Twitter that I now wonder how I managed to find time for anything else. Nowadays, I feel drained just thinking about actively using social media. 1/16

The Government must block Nigel Farage’s resignation until the Standards Commissioner finishes investigating him. The people of Clacton deserve the full facts. If a by-election does go ahead, all parties should stand aside. We cannot give oxygen to this vanity project.