In walks a dame with legs til Thursday and trouble written all over her face. “How can I help you?” I says. She snaps, “I wanna find the person who wrote on my face.”

Music offers a bond, it's hard to explain. Love this.

Ms. Winston Smith@judenmarysmomma.bsky.social · 20h ago

To lift you to joy

One Halloween, I fired off three (3) eggs broadside at the P&B bus as she passed me at 30mph. I just wanted to document this for historians.

They woke me up in the corn maze again but this time my keys weren’t still in the ignition.

pound town, but it’s just an English bank

And look, I love cool tech stuff, but this isn’t cool tech stuff, it’s an obvious scam from a known scammer. Honest reporters should treat it as such.

Can we see some actual real life applications of this technology? Can I see what happens when you try to take off next to a crowded sidewalk after picking up your to-go dinner order? What’s the actual range and flight time? (Assuming this thing can actually fly and not just fall)

I’m going to be so pissed if I get killed by a Tesla falling on my head like an anvil falling on the goddamn Coyote.

so many ghosts in my life would be loving this brewers win. i hope my dad, grandpa & lee are all hanging out with ueck somewhere together. 💙💛

Funniest play of the LA/Milwaukee game was Will Smith's double/Frelick's error. Watch the security people down the line. One barrel rolls off the field into the stands. the one near the foul pole panics, grabs the chair and darts into fair territory. You can see the fear in their eyes, total panic.

The scariest houses don’t put up any Halloween decorations

From my attorney. My new phone also blinks out. This has happened my whole life and why I don't wear watches or jewelry. I have no idea if it's significant or not, but enjoy it just the same

Still trying to understand how Napster got shut down, but Anthropic is going public and still hasn’t paid us authors yet after stealing our work.

Stop calling them data centers and refer to them as bullshit factories.

I get my old/new ride back next week with new ignition, coil overs, and after 15 years...a parking brake. My pappy said son...don't be a crook

I don’t think I’m funny at all. These posts are cries of pain

"Are you taking advantage of your employer 401k match" UH the employer should be taking advantage of my offer not to release sixty live frogs into the ventilation shaft

I don’t care who has me blocked. I want to know who has thrown up in their mouth a little while reading one of my earnest skeets

I remember when I could remember, those were the days.

I forgot that Jake Bauers kept playing because he needed the health insurance. THANK YOU SHITTY AMERICAN HEALTH CARE!

Made some exciting new advances in the field of emitting unclassifiable noises during staff meeting today.

When I used to buy an oil filter from the store they had a mini phone book list of proper filters for my vehicle. Now I have to rely on lying chat bots to give me correct information and this is not progress.

I wonder what Ray Charles thought of this cover? I know I thought it sounded an awful lot like Ray Charles actually singing, but it was Richard Manuel. youtu.be/rmV2KkbLU3E?...

Georgia On My Mind - Richard Manuel

YouTube video by Christopher Conte

youtu.be

my favorite led zeppelin song is the one where they sing about the psychological descent of a mystical elf who uses an ancient tarot deck to guide him to the dark underground realm where he beats a sprite to death with an obsidian scrying crystal.

Some of these beginning/end legal tomes are quite comical. I had no idea there was a law on fright

So when the worst boss i ever had insisted i wear a tie to work, i went to a thrift score and scored 5 for $1. $2 later and within the next work week, their tie mandate died peacefully.

Remember, voting is the easiest way to make your voice heard! Check out the link in our bio or kluweoc.com for resources and be sure to return your ballot before Tuesday, November 3. #gotv #vote #ca #oc #ad72 @chriswarcraft.bsky.social

AI execs: “Our product is going to kill you 🥰😘” the general populace: “we don’t think you should do that” AI execs, dancing on a yacht powered by orphans: “Yooouuurre gonnnaaa diiiieee🎶🎵” everyone else: “i really don’t like this” AI execs, frolicking atop a mountain of skulls: “Why so hostile??”

Salt is quite literally older than dirt but given everything these days, this container supposedly expiring next week feels about right