getting reports that crab man is iridescent. but they're all shades of green
on vacation and my brain is normal now so in lieu of posts i can offer you some ελληνικά γατάκια
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my son, Choward, is grounded and will be off the internet after i caught him saying that "wasbappin is the christopher hitchens of today"
my son Choward was sad today because he says he feels he's always misunderstood. i told him to try speaking louder. important reminder that we need to be there for our children to offer them our wisdom #parenting #parent-win
i caught my son Choward battle rapping with his friends and he started with: "im eating a banan of, bitch, and thats not all" but then he couldnt come up with anything else but his little friends were cheering him on and saying it was "fire". the kids are alright
this is exactly what i mean see? its not a dungeon its an oubliette. anyway, i am to enter it and never be seen again
greek yoghurt walnuts pear and honey is like a delicious snack, to me
imo we should replace everyone's phone with great stone spires watching silently over the endless desert at the edge of our world
You'd think it would be impossible to move a ship with just your arms, but it's just a matter of having the right tool for the job - Oars. And plenty of them. But it wasn't long until people sought to harness the most fickle force of all - wind.
going to be honest with you big man I heard fuck all when I put that shell to my ear, but for a fleeting moment the coolness of the shell against my ear soothed me
gf is insisting on telling me about "mewk" which is something she just made up
sun tzu at mechanic: alright mr tzu, your car is all fixed up it'll run you about- sun tzu: perhaps we could discuss this in a different location mr tzu your bill? sun tzu: tell me about the bill in a bog. mr tzu. sun tzu: I will be on the adjacent high ground.
Can’t you see the divine in the mundane? Do you need the robes and the rules and the stale ritual? Don’t you know that god is a exhaust burnt fennel growing from the central reservation of the A38?
*aloud, shattering the dismal silence of the open plan office* you guys are all my muchachos
tearing up explaining to my gf how unfair it is that MF DOOM died
[dark figure behind a smokey desk]: *There will be a reckoning.* me: yes i expect so [dark figure]: *There must be recompense.* me: no doubt. wait.. for me? or you? [figure]: *There will be an accounting.* me: well.. that's good i guess. you are my accountant after all
[explaining to a young wolfcub where babies came from] well you see there are two wolves inside of you
