You ever stare at your dog like I can't believe this is free. He could easily charge for this

I have, with my own eyes, watched my tax dollars in the form of missiles as they hit buildings inhabited by civilians. I'd much prefer subsidizing a grocery story I don't use.

USA TODAY Opinion@usatodayopinion.usatoday.com · 2d ago

Opinion: Mamdani's idea may sound appealing, but it's NYC taxpayers who will take the hit, subsidizing discounts they may never even use.

Remember to be kind to yourself today. You can be evil to yourself tomorrow. On Wednesday you should be kind to ducks. On Thursday the ducks will be evil to you, so watch out for that

My ideal sleep setup is one flatter pillow and one thicker pillow like they’re an old timey comedy duo.

I just found out "summonsed" is a word and now I have to leave the English language

Groggily, you wake up, opening your eyes to see sunlight on spring leaves. You blink and stretch the young muscles of a spotted fawn. “Data centers”? “Explosive diarrhea”? The memories fade quickly, it was all a dream. Your mother licks your brow affectionately. Oh look, jewelweed, your favorite.

Biblical Angles for Antler Gallery at Seattle Art Fair, Fri-Sun, July 24-26

Carrying a little mouse in my jacket pocket and whispering to it like a spy talking into a hidden microphone

If you're not outraged, you should be

America keeps trying to get me to go to her birthday party and I’m like no girl u need to go to the hospital

Close your eyes and imagine the thing you want most in the world. Now imagine yourself achieving that thing. Now imagine a worm wearing a shoe. Now do a cartwheel.

Dems have to run on this hard. Do not let the RFK types try to spin what his own party just signed off on here. Actual Monsanto, the comic book villain of Adbusters days, was shielded from liability over poisoning Americans. I don't care if it's slopulism: this Supreme Court wants you dead.

Kyle Griffin@kylegriffin1.bsky.social · last mo.

Reuters: U.S. SUPREME COURT RULES IN FAVOR OF BAYER'S BID TO LIMIT LAWSUITS IN STATE COURT CLAIMING ITS ROUNDUP WEEDKILLER CAUSES CANCER

Subscribing to the print version of the Onion was, and continues to be, a great decision. @theonion.com feel free to use this as a testimonial

Reminder: If you're the kind of person who complains about how "divided" we are, but not the actual reasons for that division, you are always welcome to adopt someone else's better and smarter opinions in the name of unity. :)

you: Please, dr moreau. your unholy creations are an affront to god. creatures of land should not combine with creatures of the sea. a baby belongs with its mother sheep, not imprisoned within a pearlescent shell until you see fit to pry open its hinges dr moreau: clamb

Touching grass is not enough I need to share a sunny log with five or six turtles

I've lived in Seattle 4 years and have met 3 dogs named Pickles

Secretary Roadkill is literally trying to ban Prozac.

Matt Novak@paleofuture.bsky.social · 3mo ago

Kennedy's health officials explored US ban of some widely used antidepressants

Looking to hire a very small person to ride around on my shoulder like a parrot. Or a very large person whose shoulder I can ride around on like a parrot. Or a very average sized person who can calm me down until I get over this whole parrot thing

Me, describing the cats: They are jerks and one of them pooped all over the floor. Him, not understanding the context: I told you not to listen to the news in the morning.

Happy May Day. They can’t kill us all.

My latest newsletter is about how the media defines "political violence" as something that happens exclusively to politicians, and ignores its primary victims: everyone else.

What's Political Violence?

When the media talks about political violence, they're only telling part of the story

stringinamaze.net

get out of my brain abby

It's Abby. Yep@itsabbyyep.bsky.social · 3mo ago

yay weekend

Lol folks on Seattle Now complaining about stores giving out grocery bags with no handles. Bring your own bags and you'll have the bags you like. It's easy. I just keep some stashed in my car and backpack. You can even get ones that pack up very small. So simple. Get it together, Seattle @kuow.org

Time for my emotional support roasted potatoes

Imagine being a Greenland shark. Deep under the ice, below any sight of the sun, you float almost motionless above the seabed. You do not know what is happening anywhere else in the world. You do not even know there is anywhere else in the world. This is the seven hundred years of your life.