Why is a woman still not safe

@treemuseums.bsky.social

dirty leftie. sitting under a tree by a creek reading a book. feminist of course. mama bear to a queer kid. fix your hearts or die ❤️

It's demoralizing living in a nonstop Abuse-a-thon: we've had to learn the sordid details of so many men's abhorrent behavior; I mean this summer has been Graham Platner, Andrew Tate, Jared Leto, Max Miller, plus the horrific L.A. rape-murder of the child by the rapper, to name a few lowlights.

This is another way we live in rape culture; we live in a culture where we have to hear about monstrosity all the time. Sometimes I look at those top stories lists and wonder if I'm the only one who notices that two or three or four of the ten are about violence against women.

There’s no contradiction between this kind of pornographic misogyny and puritanical misogyny of the old Christian right. Both use sexuality to enact men’s domination over women. That one sect forces sex and the other prohibits it is largely a matter of taste.

But when it comes to their own wives, children and, frequently, staff members, in the same way that they'd be outraged if vandals trashed a shed on their property but would feel wholly justified in trashing it themselves, their concerns re: sexual violence begin and end with Who Owns That Person.

Which is also, not coincidentally, why they're angrier about people wanting the Epstein files released than they are at their contents: because they see the victims as either the rightful property of their abusers, or as ownerless property that the abusers were free to claim.

Conservatives scaremonger to their base about the sexual threat posed by outsiders (migrants, liberals, queer folk) solely because the hypothetical victims here "belong to" conservative men. But they reserve the right for those same men to treat their own property however they wish.

Men believe they should get to own a slave with no effort on their part. “Can’t you just manage my life and my emotions and my ego without getting anything in return?” THEY ARE NOT. LONELY. ENOUGH.

so anyway this weekend I was at a coffee shop and next to me was a 37-year-old realtor meeting with her client, a 77-year-old male toddler I know their exact ages because he asked her, then harangued her when she demurred, then told her he was 77 to peer-pressure her into disclosing

"Those in favour of women's rights versus those in favour of trans rights" - 5 minutes on the BBC and it's really not a surprise that the UK has turned into one of the most transphobic countries among developed democracies

I wrote this essay Monday evening, in a state of agitation after watching Max Miller’s use his wife’s act of making him dinner as evidence that he couldn’t possibly have abused her. I published it this morning, and mere hours later it’s all gotten even more horrific. 1/ dot-connecting.ghost.io/on/

On Max Miller’s dinner

Believing survivors means understanding that survivors do many things to keep themselves safe — including cook dinner for their abusers.

dot-connecting.ghost.io

Really weird to me how incredibly rich white men get to say stuff like "in three to four years we'll be achieving nuclear fusion from honey" and the stock markets go "wow, sounds great bro!" and the news just reports it with maybe a paragraph at the end of "critics say this is unlikely".

It's difficult for words to convey just how disappointing this NSW Govt decision really is. Apparently, some kinds of hate deserve criminal punishment, while others don't. And the main difference seems to be whether faith groups are doing the hating. #nswpol #auslaw www.smh.com.au/politics/nsw...

NSW government rejects own inquiry’s hate speech findings after months of delay

The Minns government will ignore the key recommendation of its own inquiry into hate speech laws.

smh.com.au

This is the no win situation abusers like Miller place their victims in. If an abused woman prioritizes protecting herself & her children by seeking authority intervention & limiting accessibility, they'll accuse her of alienation. If she fawns, it's evidence he's a good father.

BildBildBild