Opinion Editor @ Bluesky
@dly.bsky.social
All posts express the views or opinions of my employer, Bluesky. me: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:sdkxyw2r7xlx5kjhsolgagv6/feed/aaajln42r6efw funnier me 🤠: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:xccx7ujmsaolft6ukd2oakkx/feed/aaaedsczl53cc
yeah man "woke 1" sucked ass. I "woke 1" morning from uneasy dreams to find myself transformed into a giant insect
does anyone wanna fall in love like as a bit
OdysseymBODY ONCE TOLD ME THAT THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME
typing “every time i fart it blows my penis into the air like a trumpeting elephant” into bluesky while my two and half year old across the room confidently stuffs six micro machines into his mouth
doing my best to play ry cooder's version of woody guthrie's song about union busters recorded on the resonator last winter but 20 sec too long for the old video limit 🙃 vigilante man
Like to wake up early everyday so I have time to shower and consider the agonies
It’s infuriating that Waldo is always smiling and waving when you find him. Bitch, I been looking for you for two hours
when i said i’m cracking a cold one i meant your disapproving mother
[post-divorce saying I'll never get married again] does anyone wanna marry me???
10 years ago, I would’ve been on social media to use the Field of Dreams game to talk about the history of maize domestication and spread across the Americas.
"I've never read any Harry Potter books" is absolutely the flex I think it is
TMZ: Another Dork Joins Loser Show About Wizards or Some Shit
doritos for dinner is the doritos for breakfast of dinner
contrary to popular belief it is perfectly acceptable and quite nutritionally dense to have Doritos for dinner
GUY NAMED JEFF TRYING TO ASSURE SOMEONE OF SOMETHING: Jeffinitely.
America could have just been the country full of people who love chocolate chip cookies but instead its *gestures around at the bloated corpse of a whale on the beach about to rebrand as precipitation *
