i really have no patience whatsoever for people who are scared of muslims having elected office

I must have cooked more than a thousand risottos, yet every time the emergence of something that looks edible from what had previously resembled a pond is a blessed relief.

Rachel Dratch

The Independent@the-independent.com · 16h ago

James Bond producer shares update on 007 casting: ‘It’s got to be really different’

AI flyers and info graphics have been embraced by charities and fundraisers too😭😭😭😭😭 pls don't make me ignore your good cause ffs

I don't dunk on people but the dude saying 'If you hate AI, could you get through a working day if it all went away tomorrow?!'is testing my resolve on that so much. I don't use your dogshit thief machine incompetence tech, Sparkie. I fucking work for a living.

I was so furious about that Channel 4 ADHD documentary that I done a sarcasm.

The Daily Tism@thedailytism.com · 2d ago

The Great Sun Myth, from the producers of Not Quite Walls, Not Quite Gaps: What are Doors? and Trees: What’s Their Game?, will hear from the growing number of professional opinion-havers who are boldly questioning mainstream “science” and “facts”.

I don’t understand why some commentators seem to think Badenoch is doing well as leader, when everything I see her do fits exactly this description. Sorry, she just comes across as very stupid

Dorian Lynskey@dorianlynskey.bsky.social · 18h ago

Badenoch represents double-down conservatism. Never apologise or moderate. Insult your opponents. Patronise journalists when challenged. Contradict yourself, lie, whatever it takes, but never back down. And that's how you end up creating an extremely avoidable Tory antisemitism scandal overnight

Just thinking how Johnson spoke like a newspaper column — colourful, bantering bullshit — whereas Badenoch speaks like the worst kind of comment section: querulous, chippy, pedantic (I'm just talking tone here, not content)

Last week, I went to the theatre. Stood up to let a late middle aged couple into their seats next to us. Earwigged them as they sat down. “Hmm. Quite an angle.” “AI says it’s not a bad view.” “Ah! Good!” They were sitting in the ACTUAL seats. But they were trusting AI more than their own eyes.

This is one of the many examples of why the producer pitching question “why now?” is a load of old shitpoop

Neil Norman And His Cosmic Orchestra@fubsyshabaroon.bsky.social · 2d ago

Perhaps the unlikeliest of comedy sketches to crop up in 2026, but also one of the funniest:

Rain delay at Headingley. Weather I see what you’ve done for others #thecricket

Right, which one of you did Ship of Theseus last night, so I know who to shout at #OnlyConnect

If you see someone with nonce glasses remember to clearly say “Meta, stop recording” before you kick their arse. The only thing those things have disrupted is the “You wouldn’t hit someone wearing glasses would you?” industry.

The islanders are now using ChatGPT to tell them which beaches they can use to avoid the shark, but obviously chat keeps being wrong and they keep getting eaten The shark wins, the end

weinberg@weinbergs.bsky.social · 7mo ago

let's pretend: Universal announces a screenwriting contest for Jaws 5. What's your pitch?

Say what you like about Rod Liddle. No, really, go on. We may as well stretch this into a second day.

Wow, The Media Terves And Sensible Opinionist Set seem VERY touchy about us orrible oiks repeatedly mentioning that their dead bestie Rod Liddle beat his pregnant girlfriend and wrote repeatedly about wanting to view CSAM and rape children just bc it's true, we should probably all stop saying that

The asterisk in B*Witched is hiding the letter a. It's an old Scottish swear word meaning "testicle rash".

astronaut: houston we have a problem nasa: that's not the sort of language we use at this company astronaut: sorry, houston we have an opportunity to excel

I don't think people are ready for this kind of joke yet.

Rod Liddle was very much like Marmite, in that you wouldn’t want him on your television screen, radio, or newspaper.

I do not think I am too smart to get entangled by the obsequious, designed-to-be-addictive AI chatbots and writing generators. They scare me beca what if I lost the ability to write without them (which is the business plan of the technology) So, like cigarettes, I simply won’t start.

perfect illustration of how these people will ignore all sorts of horrible bigotry - often towards women, including domestic violence - if the bigot in question demonstrates the correct level of transphobia

Libby@captainlibatron.bsky.social · 3d ago

Dear god

hoo boy is this an answer which raises more questions

Adam Bienkov@adambienkov.bsky.social · 3d ago

"Questions about [my] money could go on for years," says Nigel Farage, when asked about the secret deal he struck with the convicted fraudster George Cottrell before agreeing to return as leader of Reform UK.

The greatest magic trick of them all is *lying*. The reason you can't figure out that coin vanish even after the conjurer performs it three times in a row is that they *didn't* do the same trick three times in a row! 1/

It's hard enough creating an hour of comedy, let alone getting reviewers in. So if you're doing a Fringe show, I'm giving it 5 stars. Feel free to pop em on your poster

The downfall was TV Tropes (and YouTubers lifting from it). It's a fascinating website yet, it's encouraged millions to scream at the telly, when they spot a recognisable thing, "TROPE!" You don't want stories without tropes, like you don't want music without a key, except as arty experiments.

Alasdair Stuart@alasdairstuart.com · 3d ago

And the point: 'Because to be able to identify the mechanism does not invalidate the mechanism.' That resonates with me because of my weird training. One part growing up with an English teacher parent, one part Radio 4 audio drama, one part close up magic

Ratatouille is a film about the difficulties of being a head chef

The Ring is a film about the importance of looking after your emotional well-being

House clearances undertaken is the usual terminology but ok

I’ve never been more hyped to repost a bunch of bums onto my timeline

Sara Gibbs@sararoseg.bsky.social · 3d ago

For those of you who don’t know, Chapter Two, landing tomorrow, is titled An Army of Bums. What could that mean? Is it a metaphor? No. No it is not. We are also so sorry for the lack of umlaut I don’t know what we were thinking please don’t cancel us.