When I die, I want them to write that I died of supernatural causes, but offer no explanation.

Welcome friends to the end of the earth no tears, have fun, live love, laugh!…no, don’t mind that dead giraffe. This is only the beginning of a new chapter (I hope!) let’s celebrate, raise a mug, release the hounds! I joke…the dove (the pigeon release pigeon) #vss365 #whistpr

Thing I wrote about pigeons in @urbanpigspress.bsky.social

Pigeon – Syreeta Muir

She’s in bed, slowing herself down to one breath per five Mississippi’s. Wants to make the room disappear/reappear/disappear behind her closed eyelids, so it looks just like dusk through a black si…

urbanpigspress.co.uk

hymen pigeons

And I said what about breakfast at Jimothy’s?

I’m forgetting what you did last summer ooh hang on don’t tell me

Oh, probably just collapse into a pile of goo, you?

Sweet boy

Homemade drying rack getting kinda full

My dog sleeps 23 hours of the day so that she'll be really energetic when the Vikings invade.

After careful consideration, I've decided to win the lottery.

Ever get stuck appreciating the mouth feel of a word? Like, ameliorate, ameliorate, ameliorate. Delicious.

Why is oversight the opposite of overlooking

A peek through the rain clouds

Can't. I have six tries to find a hidden five-letter word.

A conclave of rubber ducks meets in the deep woods once every decade to discuss their centuries long anthropological study of the human race. #TinyStories

If you stand outside under the full moon with a Tootsie pop upheld in each hand, an owl or two will come to answer life's biggest mysteries, or give you winning lottery numbers...or just steal the suckers and fly away. It's a toss-up. Owls are unpredictable creatures.

stagflation is when we don't have enough doe

alexis simpson@amutepiggy.bsky.social · 11mo ago

*angrily slamming the encyclopedia Britannica through a glass table* stagflation has NOTHING to do with deer!

My skeets are rare and hard to catch, like a really cool butterfly or a tropical disease

SHIIIT - where's my phone??

Ammonia and salmonella would be beautiful names for twin girls who are also mortal enemies

When you're floating up in an abduction ray it's like you have all the time in your world to wonder "is this a notification"

Whenever anyone mentions cranking hog I picture them winding up a big pig's tail like they're powering up an old model-T

That weird space left by a deleted word is where I live

More like...like ewww.

Julie Lavender Menace@2tickytacky.bsky.social · 11mo ago

Now, a message from Julie Lavender Menace: Instead of running back to his beloved church, Rev. Dr. Ravenscrof is vacationing in Hawaii. Don't fret, my pets. The Menaces are here for you. We'll have s'mores and two hours of rigorous Bible study. God bless.

Chugging canola oil for its calming effect.

If you’ve ever felt cursed—congratulations. You’ve been chosen. You’re the only one who can break it.