*busts into ur room throwing immaculate punch/kick combos at u

I think there'll come a day when the internet as we know it just burns. The posts and ideas people remember will transform into aphorisms, idioms, and folklore. People will say they can't be killed in a way that matters, or that they'll walk backwards into hell, and it will just be their parlance.

I’M NOT LAZY. I’M LIVING AT A SPEED THAT YIELDS HIGHER FIDELITY. LIKE RECORDING TO YOUR VCR ON SP INSTEAD OF SLP

Wednesday? I couldn’t. Oh all right, just one

When you’re sweeping and consolidate the dirt piles: that’s the good ess right there

Like a decade ago(?) i worked with a dude who only ate solent type shit. It wasnt soylent but every day he only drank water/coffee and only ate two big smoothies of his homemade nutrient swill. So we go to this mandatory dinner w/out CEO and he brings one. Our boss was like 'No you have to eat food'

im a gas station 10

going absolutely apeshitt in my lords wheat fields

there I was eating the spring roll, and that's when I realized- oh no, the mint, is it like lettuce? is this going to kill me? did I make it through everything to die of this delicious bite? so anyway I dipped it in the peanut sauce and took another bite

(Fitter Happier) still eats produce that can be washed with soap Nothing too leafy No alfalfa sprouts

In this episode ill be eating everything i find under my couch. Glory to god the creator. Without Him we are nothing. Alright lets get this couch lifted up. LOTTA cat hair wow. Ok lets get started

(into drive thru speaker): I said a HANK of MUTTON

The Bible has 150 Psalms. Not that hard to have more rhymes than that. Next

My wife: did you remember to get yogurt at the store? Me:

Massimo (mirror)@rainmaker1973-m.bsky.social · yesterday

LS2 ADVANT X CARBON helmet [📹 slim.dhifallah.54] Original post

I'm 1 of 3 sisters, so take this writing tip from me: never have anyone call their sister "sis". Calling them "dude" is much more realistic

my bare feet are like a dowsing rod for cat puke on the carpet 💫

"Don't take anything personally" applies to your personal life as well. It applies to your own thoughts.

Whenever I am tempted to imagine what another driver might be going through, I remember this and stop

Despite all my rabes, I am still just a bat in a cave

I thought fondly of a man in a meme and wished him well

for me it’s the tiny cigarette hanging out of the shrimp’s mouth

The best part of “you’re telling me a shrimp fried this rice?” is imagining the tiny frying pan

Top 10 mysterious outsiders who wandered into town and changed our lives forever

Time for my dreams to turn my fears into weird little plays

ATTENTION: my new online store is now open! this will be my new go-to for all merchandise going forward. two designs are available NOW for clothing, posters, stickers, and more - check it out at the link below SHARE WITH OTHERS AND GET THE WORD OUT I HAVE SPOKEN bornmiserable.threadless.com

bornmiserable's Shop | Featuring custom t-shirts, prints, and more

bornmiserable's Shop

bornmiserable.threadless.com

(California Love voice) existential crud

rap shows this week with my brothers @clppng.bsky.social Santa Ana is sold out. tix for the rest still available I might got some copies of the new LP with me photo by @alexsteed.bsky.social mikeeaglestinks.tumblr.com/post/8966612...

sunday again huh? guess what else- beatclub vintage damo era can footage just dropped into your timeline. do you click and expand your mind ??? CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE it’s groove time 🪩📻 youtu.be/64Gs6-6fbW8?...

Can - Halleluhwah (1971)

YouTube video by Beat-Club

youtu.be