THIS IS THE ZODIAC SPEAKING

@meatresponse.bsky.social

low-grade moron

People talk a lot about the causes of declining birth rates, but it's really simple. People used to need enough kids to put on a touring Shakespeare production - maybe six, even eight. But with the rising popularity of Samuel Beckett? Two is sufficient.

officer: 912, what’s your emergency? me: 912? this.. this isn’t the cops, is it? officer: that’s 911, 912 is fashion police me: well i need help. i just got stabbed a bunch, and the dude who did it is getting away officer: okay. what is he wearing?