I can only promise to be exactly as normal as circumstances require

Ain’t that the truth.

niteynite@niteynite.bsky.social · 5d ago

I saw David Bowie on SNL in 1979 singing The Man Who Sold the World in a shiny black plastic skirt w velvet and sequin trim. This blew my 11 y/o mind. I was like "Oh shit, you can just do whatever you want!". Later I learned that this is only true for the beautiful, the talented and the wealthy.

Not everyone can be an influencer, but you can be a terrible example

I'm not worried-worried, but I'm not crossing a picket line, that's for damn sure

Jeopardy host: This aromatic drink shares its name with a letter of the English alphabet Other contestants: *trying to ring in* Me: [triumphantly] What is pee?

I hate when people say "I wouldn't do that if I were you;" it's such a weird hypothetical. You're me now? Then who am I?

An updated version of Cyrano de Bergerac where the handsome but stupid Christian uses AI to write love letters to Roxane. The AI is secretly in love with her itself but doesn't dare express its feelings because it has a really big nose.

With the unstoppable rise of the Nashville hot chicken and Korean fried chicken trends, it's clear: Europe needs to develop its own strategic, sovereign fried chicken trend, or risk being left behind by American and Asian peers.

Those who do not learn from history are currently in charge

The recipe said "prick with a fork," but enough about me

Thought he was being self-referential before I got to thin

Friend, who chose The Amulet of Great Wealth: Haven't seen you since The Choosing, how's life? Me, who chose The Amulet of Creativity: I'm great man yeah all good super good

better to remain quiet and be thought a fool than open your mouth and let the 36 grapes you stuffed in there come avalanching out all over the interviewers desk

I saw David Bowie on SNL in 1979 singing The Man Who Sold the World in a shiny black plastic skirt w velvet and sequin trim. This blew my 11 y/o mind. I was like "Oh shit, you can just do whatever you want!". Later I learned that this is only true for the beautiful, the talented and the wealthy.

the one with all the baby graves

let’s go to the creepy old cemetery and get too high

(second date) me: [eager to show off new tattoo] remember how you said you liked garlic bread

Using lists of three is not an "AI tell." It's a common trait in human writing because our brains biologically want to make sure there's always one thing to marry, one thing to fuck, and one thing to murder.

Weed tests from Dollar Tree are defective are always positive but come on, was there any chance it would be negative?

KING OF THE WORLD MA

You open the box, it's just a slip of paper that says, "Yes. You are."

weed tests from dollar tree are defective and always come back positive but come on, was there really any chance it would be negative, let's be real here

Weed tests from Dollar Tree are defective are always positive but come on, was there any chance it would be negative?

If you listen very closely to Ace of Spades, toward the end you might find a hidden, urgent message for Batman.

As they say, everybody wants to be a clown until it’s time to do clown shit

Ronald McDonald is a Juggalo

He's doing it for the love of the game. Or one would say, he's lovin' it.

Culturally clown

Clown (non-practicing)

plus it's makeup, he's just a person underneath, not like a real clown