It really takes a lot of courage for hamburger to ask for help.
Jez
@jez1.bsky.social
Badly wired bsky.app/profile/jez1.bsky.social/search
Are Canadian forests still on fire or just the peoples genitals?
yes! and fun fact, cypress hill's "hits from the bong" incorporates the main riff from 'son of a preacher man' in it
Cypress Hill - Hits from the Bong (Official Audio)
YouTube video by CypressHillVEVO
youtube.com
“Son of A Preacher Man” is a good soundtrack for life. Driving along a lonesome highway? Son of a preacher man. Eating a wheel of cheese? Son of a preacher man. Having sex with a guy named Billy Ray? Son of a motherfucking preacher man
onf: something (or someone) that's so proportionately both on and off that it can't be either or neither
I had the fastest office chair in accounts receiving and that's how I met your mother.
I read that you can think about shooting free throws for a month without setting foot on a basketball court and get better at it. I tried that with playing guitar. A month later I threw my guitar straight through the net.
I have an appointment to get a badass tattoo this afternoon, but my stomach feels yucky because I am nervous—if you are into tough guys
me: What a good looking baby. How old? them: Thank you! She’s 15 months. me: So she’s 1…
Caulking the windowsill with peanut butter to ward off people allergic to peanut butter
I’m developing a new search engine it won’t return slop or snitch you out to the fbi it’s called FuckFuckNo
I am no longer a young dude, therefore, my contractural obligation to carry the news has hereby ended
doesn’t crime go down when most people are generally having their basic needs met, or something like that
Anyone who has a working brain experiences pain when Trump speaks.
The Baseball Furies just needed to add an R and they’d have been the best gang ever.
Pardon me, is this road less traveled by? I don't normally bring an empty barstool out to the woods and gesture as if some path sits alone and approachable next to it but I saw you from across the zooming in on google satellite maps and
The internet is secreting a toxin more deadly than any tree frog today. Do not lick your phone.
A cool thing to say before someone shoots you would be "those bullets better be silver, playboy"
[wine & paint night] Wife: wtf is that Me: Rihanna fighting Godzilla in machu picchu Wife: Drunk Guy Behind Me: that's fuckin rad
Every day mudskippers exit the ocean to ravage the mudlands so I don't think now is the appropriate time to be upset that I insulted your granddaughter, Susan.
There's your traditional successes, then there's putting dinner in the crockpot first thing in the morning.